{{{{{{{Bubba}}}}}}} You are so right. But not right at the same time. A sort of "Catch 22" type thing. Oy.

Thanks for the slurpee with a touch of Gran Mariner. Yum! *Hiccup* Oops. 'Scuse me. *Blush*

Hey, I only just signed back on again, read your post, then saw you'd responded here.

I need to shut down my PC, come back up and run a few "crap cleaning" programs cuz this poor contraption is so overworked and it's a piece 'o crap on top 'o that. Heh. Then, I'm on my way back to your thread again. It should be about between 10 to 15 minutes before I get back and I ain't got no idea how long it will be for me to type out what I wanna say to you after having read your last post at your Shooting Star thread. So, gimme about 25 minutes totaled or so. Thanks and Hugs!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Hi Alex! I came to play one of your favorite songs from one of your favorite scenes in the movie Labyrinth with David Bowie. Oh how you would Laugh and make your Happy Sounds! It was so cute whenever David would sing the word Baby and you would repeat him and even say "Hello Baby" using your sexy voice. Also your "Baby! Baby! Baby! I'm a Baby! Pretty Baby! Baby! Baby!" Man you really got into this one. I hope you enjoy and like the images I made just for you My Sweet Baby!

Dottie

I didn't see your message until this evening and oh... what can I say Dottie. You are such a special person!

I have felt like bawling all day but can't show it 'cause hubby thinks I'm off my rocker and this just proves the point. Then reading your post, well it's so comforting and best of all that you really understand. I cried my eyes out (in the bathroom where no-one can see me) but I so needed to do that.

I have lots to say but I can't talk like right now but will be back.

Just a couple of things. Have you tried pming me? 'Cause mine just haven't gone thru, but if you can pm me I can give you my email address if I am able to respond that is.. it seemed to work before, I wonder if I am pm the wrong person or something...

Also I have already paid through visa for the vet. The visa people said that they couldn't refund even though what we asked for was not actually what was performed. The vet however didn't explain what she meant by "exploratory surgery" and offered no other options or quotes for any other possible types of surgery. In fact she expressed there was no need for anything because the organs looked good on the x-ray and the bloodwork was good. So obviously a severed bowel cannot be detected on an x-ray. But I am putting in a complaint to the Canadian Vet Association. It is so stressful to write this down - I also can't stand the thought of going in to that vet for any records, not sure if I will have to. Anyway, another story but it sickens me, the whole thing.



Wow, Dottie that is just so cool. I never thought of birds this way, but it's true they are angels - pure souls, like our dogs, cats, rats, ferrets etc - but they even have wings. I've always been fascinated that a bird could actually bond with a human. I saw a program once where a women had an amazing love bond with chickens - I think because of how we live most humans cut ourselves off from this amazing connection. And the dinosaur connection, I have heard that too - so interesting.



Thank you for that perspective - really thank you so much. I think that is why Ziggy was special to me. Her fur was dull and she had spent most of her time at the SPCA in a small cage since for some reason her spay was postponed. I thought of how little and unloved she looked in there and how much she loved and appreciated our home. I have never seen a cat show so much gratitude. She "came out" of herself and was the big personality she was always meant to be in our home. I know I will not have a Ziggy or a Zita again. My heart has no room right now to be broken again, and I know our 17 yr old Rosie dog is coming close to the end also. But these are the big questions about cats or birds in need - and I put those questions back to you because I know there is a special bird out there - not Alex, of course not to replace or diminish him - but one that would so benefit from your care. And having said that I do know the hurt involved also.... oh do I ever having lost my "cat in need" as well. But this was so different than your cir%%stances.



Well amazingly simple, and it certainly does make sense. It takes away those "what ifs" doesn't it. Maybe in some other dimension we're living out the results of other choices but whatever we're experiencing here, now, however much it hurts and however much we would like to send it back. It is. It just is anyway.

Much more to say, but I have to run.

Lots of love Dottie and thanks a big bunch for your thoughtful response!
Jan

Hi {{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}} My eyes are a bit out of focus right now and so is my brain. Oy. I usually get that "pick me up" feeling in the evenings so can see and concentrate better. I promise to come back some time this evening to respond to you unless the electricity goes out or I drift off to sleep cuz I may try to escape what day this is. Oh, I sure do know that you know what I mean.
Oy Vey. Oy Vey. Oy Vey. That is a rare and triple Oy Vey. Arg.

I want you to know I see that you posted a response and I will be back, Dear One. Love You Soooo Much!!!

Big Tight Comforting Hugs!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Editing: Jan, what I mean is that our electricity in this part of town shuts down way more often than other parts of Tampa because of stuff like storms, someone messing with a breaker box way up on one of the lines, a car crashing into a post and out goes everyone's electricity and stuff like that. I just wanted to make sure you know it's not me and my bills are all paid up so I don't want you to worry.
I thought I'd better clarify about the electricity thing. More Hugs!!!

(((((((((((((((Dottie)))))))))))))))))

I know what day it is and I understand wanting to escape.

I hope you get a clear message about where Alex is and what really happened - I'm just putting it out there to those unseen to give you comfort and connect you with Alex again...

And also sending you peace with "what is", because, in your words - "if anything was supposed to be some way other than it is, then it would be that way and not the way it is."

Sending you love, healing and hope.

Jan.

Okay, thought I posted this, but I somehow didn't.

To you Dottie from Alex!
- Making the fonts bigger since your eyes are out of focus today. This song popped into my head this morning so maybe it was for you...?


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Urv7tyeJ7qE


Here are the lyrics

Ordinary Miracle

It’s not that usual when everything is beautiful
It’s just another ordinary miracle today

The sky knows when its time to snow
You don’t need to teach a seed to grow
It’s just another ordinary miracle today

Life is like a gift they say
Wrapped up for you everyday
Open up and find a way
To give some of your own

Isn’t it remarkable?
Like every time a raindrop falls
It’s just another ordinary miracle today

Birds in winter have their fling
And always make it home by spring
It’s just another ordinary miracle today

When you wake up everyday
Please don’t throw your dreams away
Hold them close to your heart
Cause we are all a part
Of the ordinary miracle

Ordinary miracle
Do you want to see a miracle?

Its seems so exceptional
Things just work out after all
It’s just another ordinary miracle today

The sun comes up and shines so bright
It disappears again at night
It’s just another ordinary miracle today

It’s just another ordinary miracle today


And another link for you Dottie - wow I can see why Alex was so endearing...

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/395796/talking_quaker_parrot/

take care Dottie - thinking of you.

Jan.

Oh My Gosh {{{{{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}}}}} What Beautiful Gifts you've brought me. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you so very much!!!

The song with what I believe to be scenes from Charlotte's Web is absolutely amazing! I don't recall seeing that movie but have seen the animated Charlotte's Web several times and never get tired of it. Love it so very much. I want Wilbur piggy. Can I ... I mean May I have him, please? I can? Thank you! I'm reminded of Grandma Brennan from my old neighborhood when I was a tiny thing growing up. Remember, this was not a rural area in nature. There were good sized yards for each home. Still it was a street with houses on each side, yada, yada, yada.

She wasn't my Grandma but everyone called her Grandma Brennan cuz she was grandma to all us kids. Well, she had a pet pig and that may have been a little before my time but I doubt it. It's just that I may have been a babe in arms at that point. Anyway, Grandma Brennan loved that pig so much. She'd put a collar on it and walk it up and down the block. Then the pig got bigger and bigger cuz it was a regular pig. Not a Pot bellied pig. Mean 'ol neighbors began to complain about her pig being so big. From what I can recall, Grandma Brennen's daughter told her she'd have to give away her pig. She lived with her daughter Earlene. I only wish I had been older when that happened cuz I'd have had a thing or two or ninety-seven things to say about that. I wanna slap some of those neighbors silly. Still do but I can't cuz they're dead but it's on my "To Do" list when I go to Heaven . . .

I will walk right up to them and say, "Oh Hi, Mr. Tiemann. Great to see you. Say, do you remember about Grandma Brennan's pet pig and why she had to let it go? Here take this." Wooossshhh! Smack him upside the head with one of my Angel wings. "Oh, Mr Tiemann. Remember what you did to Mildred Hinkle's pet squirrel, where you did it, why you did it and how you did it?" Wooossshhh! Wooossshhh! Wooossshhh! Smack that man literally to Kingdom Come for that one. But, he was a very dear, sweet, loving and wonderful man. Hand to my heart. I can't say as much about a couple other of the grown up female and a one or three of the male grown up male neighbors. Actually they were all wonderful people. They just did some bad things sometimes and really good things most of the time like all the rest of us.

I did get that nap and woke around 8:00 PM my time where I live. One thought came to me immediately. If Ann is reading this, it was in that same Vet Clinic where I volunteered and told you about the sweet, loving, friendly Doberman Pincher but won't say that fur kid's name or anything else about that fur kid at this time for reasons that will be obvious at least to Ann. Amazing, ain't it Ann? Same name and I told you all about it before ... You know. Before.

What came to my mind was another time in that Vet Clinic when a family brought in a cute as heck puppy who was having trouble breathing. I don't really know if anyone cares to hear about the rest that happened cuz it doesn't have a happy ending.

Then I came here and saw what you Gifted to me, Jan! OMG! Wonderful! Wonderful! Wonderful!!! I want to grab you and Hug you Sooo Biggg!!! Yeah, I'm having a very difficult time right now even though everything is the way it should be. Just like we talked about, Jan. My heart is racing and I can hear it beating in my right ear. Sounds to me like my blood pressure is up. I'm afraid to cry too hard or it may make me feel more physically ill than I already am or could put my health in jeopardy. Can't have that cuz I got plans to take down and rid the world of at least three very bad, bad, bad Monsters. Legally, of course. You know that. I could never physically hurt/harm or stand by and not help someone or animal who needed any kind of help even if it was one of them three Monsters. Why is that? I think it may be cuz I'm stoopid and dumb as dirt or something cuz Dayum! Hey, I ain't no Mother Teresa, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. or Mahatma Ghandi. I'm nice but not that nice so what the heck is my basic problem ... Oy and don't even answer cuz it's a rhetorical question. Still Oy Oy Oy I have got to be dumber than a bag of rocks. Sorry, no insult to the rocks.

Again, thank you! Thank you! Thank you so very, very much, Jan!!!

Tons of Hugs, Love, Peace, Hope and Many Angels!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Dottie

There's another version of the song with more piggie and other animated character shots. The intro is a bit weak but it gets better...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XP33Kn8RjRE


And more quaker birds for you if you haven't seen them already -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m35DG9RhqSk...feature=related

Plus an early Christmas song -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sy835onhOI...feature=related

And if you can get past the people who won't stop talking - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fq9Rh6KDCwE

or if you didn't think that was funny?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZzPABxg3sS4&NR=1

There are tons of these on Youtube. You've probably seen many of them. Wow, what great birds - I have a new appreciation for them.

Wondering - do these birds long for the freedom of flying do you think? I don't know much about birds in captivity.

Thinking of you and hoping for more than an ordinary miracle for you and for Alex!!!!

Jan.

Oh My Gosh!!! {{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}} Thank you!!! Thank you!!! Thank you!!! I have not watched the videos yet because I want to make sure my PC will allow this to go through first. Yes, still PC problems but it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin' so I can't complain. It wouldn't do me any good to complain anyway. Heh. I promise, promise, promise that as soon as I send this that I will come back and hopefully my PC will allow me to view all these Wonderful, Wonderful Gifts from You! More Big Big Biiiggg Hugs!!!

This goes out for You, Alex, Everyone Here at LS, their Fur and Feather Babies and all the World over. For Hope, For Peace and I send Much Love!!!











Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

OMG! {{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}} My PC cooperated with me. So I had to sing this ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mw6H3crLzpg

Yep, I said, "Hallelujah! My overworked PC let me see all you Gifted me. Thank you so Very Very Much!!!"

Okay, that other clip with scenes from Charlotte's Web is even more amazing! So, I just have to see that movie. Then it hit me and I remembered something. Someone posted a Website on some message board that has thousands and thousands of movies. Many are older ones but some are practically new releases. Wow! Maybe that movie will be on that Website. Hey, they are all free! Go here ...

http://www.watch-movies.net/

See all the letters in the middle? Just to the left of all those letters of the alphabet it says Movie Titles. Click on the first letter of the first word in the movie title you're looking for. Once you get there, then go to your left and type in the name of the movie you're trying to find. For example, I clicked on the "C" at the first screen. At the second screen that popped up, I typed in "Charlotte's Web" and voila! OMG! There's only one and that's the one! Lookie ...

http://www.watch-movies.net/movies/charlottes_web/

For each movie, you have the option of watching it in 4 parts or the entire movie. I think I like the four parts option. Oh, the movie will not begin by itself. After you pull up the movie and it's on your screen, look to the left at the bottom and click that button to begin the movie and also to make it pause. Jan! I can't wait to watch Charlotte's Web! Thank you!!! Thank you so much!!!

That Quaker singing, "How much is that doggie in the window" ... Is So Adorable! Awwww!!! Big smile here!

Then ... Oh My Gosh! The Quaker singing Jingle Bells does know all the words including the "Ha ha ha" parts. It just needs a little more practice. Awww! So cute and smart!

Now, the Quaker with the woman and man talking ... That's a hybrid blue Quaker and Sooo cute! Apparently a juvenile. I'd say give or take one but no more than two years old. Wanna know why it doesn't want to talk but the others were singing like crazy in the other two videos? One does not take a cam corder and point it at a Quaker or most any other parrot and expect it to do its thing unless that parrot is very, very well trained and accustomed to that cam corder. They are shy and many times very frightened by cam corders or even it you walk past their cages carrying some unfamiliar object. True. Those other two were done with a cam corder type thingy already set up and pointed at the cage.

For example, this one may have a cam corder set up but mommy is there and that Quaker wants out. So obvious that anyone can tell. Still, its singing pretty well. Awww! Lookie ...

(Click Below) I'm Singing "Oh What a Beautiful Morning!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kNQxnmRFa44

And these next two are what I'm talking about. They have a fixed set up which their mommy or daddy can turn on and leave the room to let their feather kids do their thing without any distractions. These are Great! Lookie ...

(Click Below) I'm Singing "If You're Happy and You Know it and You Really Wanna Show it Clap Your Hands!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fvf-XpHX05k

(Click Below) I'm Singing "Supercallafagilistecexbeallidoshious! Even Though the Sound of it is Something Quite Atrocious!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8h_rO5CYQY

That last one of the Quaker laughing while sitting by a lovebird is hilarious! Alex's laugh sounded exactly like my big time laugh which was a riot and I kid you not! He loved to laugh for people. I remember when my late Kenny's mom was visiting us from Oklahoma and we were sitting in the living room. Kenny's mom was sitting in the recliner chair with her back to the cage where Alex was at the time. Well, mom let out a good laugh about something so Alex started laughing like crazy. I mean to tell you, he sounded exactly like me when I laugh hard and long. So, that made mom laugh all the more which made Alex laugh even louder and harder which made mom laugh even ... You get the picture. OMG! Hahaha!!! And, that's how Alex learned to say, "Shut up." Cuz mom finally started saying "Shut Up" while she was laughing. She said it several times and now you know how, when and why Alex learned how to say shut up. LOL!

Thanks so much for these Wonderful Gifts and Sweet Memories, Jan!!!

I wish to end by telling you this ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HecoP8WMY9E

And I mean it from the bottom of my Heart!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Hi Dottie-----Thought I would drop by to say hey and hope your doin ok.I know there is a milestone date coming up and was thinking about you.
Your forum pal, Bubba.................

Thanks so much, Bubba and Big Hugs! I had the strangest day dreaming off and on but it was the same dream. Hand to my Heart. I was composing a very beautiful post for you and Willy. I don't even know if those images exist and will try my best to recall all I said in my dream and find those images. Well, even if I do find them, I don't think they would all go on one post at your thread so I'd have to make some clickable for you to bring up.

Most of it was in gold and in message form within those gold images. I kid you not. All day long. If they don't exist, I'll try my best to recall all that they said, my own added comments and then make them myself but you know how dreams go. I sure wish I had written it all down the moment I woke. However, in my mind, I had already sent them to you in your Shooting Star thread. I will do my best. It may take a while and I may or may not be able to recall but I sure would love for you to see what I dreamed I gave to you and Willy cuz Wow and Awesome! Honest and for true.

I came to sing a sweet lullaby to Alex tonight then I'll come to your thread and ask you to please come here and read my response to you, Bubba. Okay?

Hugs, Love and Peace to You, Your Dear Wife, Willy, Lily and all the Gang!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Hi Dearest Most Precious Alex. I came by to sing you a Lullaby and tuck you in. I hope you like the images I chose as well as the song. I think you will My Treasured Feather Child. Shhh ... Here's your Lullaby.

Hey Dottie-------I couldn't find your story about the doctor visit and the pain caused by the stress.Maybe your could direct me as to which thread and what page to go to.The second story is not earth shaking but maybe at least coincidental.I was talking with someone yesterday about Willy and she shared a story about her cat that she adored and his eventual passing.Seems she had adopted her cat before she was married and he followed with her into marriage.She had bonded with him and considered him her child even after she had her own children.When he died (in her arms) she said to him to go to the mansion and wait with God and she would be with him another day forever.To this day many many years later she is still in deep sorrow about his passing.That story was enough to keep my attention as it was but then she told me his name.His name was Alex and I about fell over.I of course immediatly thought about you and realized once again just how many of us that there are who go through what we have been talking about the past 5 weeks.I have never known anyone in my life with a pet named Alex and in the course of just a number of weeks I now am aware of 2.I will say an extra prayer for you tonite and of course on the 16th for you and the eventual reunion of you and AlexYou know the longer I am away from Willy the more I think that he (and I'm sure Alex as well )are lookin at us and and sayin to each other "Our mommy and daddy really need to quit cryin because were right here and not goin anywhere till they get here.They really have nothin to worry about and there makin themselves sick for no good reason"
That's what I'm thinkin for some reason..............



If it is ok to ask and if you are up to it would you tell me about my relationships with the people below using your abilities:
1.Scotty 2.John 3.Pepe Again if you are not up to it FAHGET about it and get some rest.ok????? Pleeeeezzzzzzz?????????


No Pity(as you always admonish) I just want you to be okay.......okay????--------Your Buddy Bubba...........

Hi, Bubba. About me not being able to cry too hard: It's here on page 8, Post #159 down near the very bottom. Okay?

Oh My Gosh about your friend and her fur kid named Alex. Holy Cow! As far as her still grieving after all these years, I won't even tell you the very first song that popped into my mind cuz you don't need to know. I will say this about that song, when it gets to that one part, I cry my eyes out every single time and have for many, many years even when I was in my 'great times' part of life. Yep, it's a pretty old song but sure does apply.

I believe you're right about Willy and Alex saying those things to us. Honest and for true. I do know they can sense us, sometimes visit us and it would upset them horribly to see us so sad. That's a fact, Jack. Word.

Okay, you asked me: "If it is ok to ask and if you are up to it would you tell me about my relationships with the people below using your abilities: 1. Scotty 2. John 3. Pepe." I'll be glad to do that, Bubba. You betcha. Of course, you know where my mind is not though. Sorry about that. I just can't seem to help it. Please give me a few days to get over this one year anniversary stuff then I'll work my "magic" for you as best I can. My pleasure, Bubba. And, I'll do my very, very best to be Okay. You have my word. About doing my best to be Okay, that is. Heh.

More Hugs, Love and Peace to You and Yours!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Dottie the main thing to be as well as possible during these next few days.Luckily I am of somewhat clear mind at the moment and will be checking in again tomorrow to make sure U R ok.We both need rest and it is late.So I'll be back(in arnold swatchinwhatshis names voice) later tomorrow.I wish for you a deep restful sleep.........toodle loo.........Bubba.............

Dottie real quick before I nod off.You probably know this already but I'll take a chance.Learned think from a shrink when I was being treated for Panic Disorder.Lay down or at least in a lazy boy recliner and stretch all your muscles by pointing your toes forward and stretching your arms for a few seconds or more.Do this as if you are trying to push all the tension out of your body.Then, inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth.All slooooowlyyy....This should help you relax and bring down your B.P...............If this dosen't work go for the Jack Daniels.........naw just kiddin.........I think the breathing exercise will help.............Sleep well friend.........Bubba..........

Okie Dokie, Bubba. C U Latuh ...

More Hugs!

Your Pal,
Dottie xoxoxox

Edit: I just saw your second post. Okay, thanks! I'll try that, too. More Hugs!

Dottie

I know tomorrow is a one year "anniversary" for you. In case I am not online tomorrow, I just wanted to drop you a note here and let you know I am thinking about you and will be tomorrow also...for I had written your name on my daily calendar as a special day to remember a special person.

I am so sorry for all you have gone through and if I could work miracles...your story would have a happy ending and none of what happened would have been allowed to happen.

Just know you are being thought of and as we all share the same pain...we understand what it means when we all share a tight HUG!

Hugs, peace and healing are my wishes for you. You and your babies, especially Alex, will always be together...they and he can never be taken away from your heart....they are safe there now.


Judy

Dottie----------Just stopped by to check in on you.I'll be brief today.Wishing you a quiet and peaceful day as I know this is a difficult one.Adding you and Alex to my prayers today.Talk tonite or tomorrow.Hugs,
Bubba...............

Dottie

Hoping you have internet and video access today.

To you from Alex:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGwDYBWEDSc...feature=related



Fields of Gold

You’ll remember me when the west wind moves
Upon the fields of barley
You can tell the sun in his jealous sky
As we walk in the fields of gold

So she took her love
For to gaze awhile
Upon the fields of barley
In his arms she fell as her hair came down
Among the fields of gold

Will you stay with me, will you be my love
Among the fields of barley
You can tell the sun in his jealous sky
When we walked in the fields of gold

I never made promises lightly
And there have been some that I’ve broken
But I swear in the days still left
We’ll walk in the fields of gold
We’ll walk in the fields of gold

Many years have passed since those summer days
Among the fields of barley
See the children run as the sun goes down
Among the fields of gold
Youll remember me when the west wind moves
Upon the fields of barley
You can tell the sun in his jealous sky
When we walked in the fields of gold
When we walked in the fields of gold
When we walked in the fields of gold

And another song for all of us here at the forum!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1eR1ni6sZK4

Life is Eternal

I've been doing a lot of thinking
About growing older and moving on
Nobody wants to be told that they're getting on
And maybe going away
For a long, long stay.
But just how long and who knows
And how and where my spirit will go
Will it soar like Jazz on a saxophone
Or evaporate on a breeze
Won't you tell me please
That life is eternal
And love is immortal
And death is only a horizon
Life is eternal
As we move into the light
And a horizon is nothing
Save the limit of our sight
Save the limit of our sight

Here on earth I'm a lost soul
Ever trying to find my way back home
Maybe that's why each new star is born
Expanding heaven's room
Eternity in bloom
And will I see you up in that heaven
In all its light will I know you're there
Will we say the things that we never dared
If wishing makes it so
Won't you let me know
That life is eternal
And love is immortal
And death is only a horizon
Life is eternal
As we move into the light
And a horizon is nothing
Save the limit of our sight
Save the limit of our sight

Dottie

Have you seen this....?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnTT7u5U4Yo

Hope you're doing okay.

Jan.

{{{{{{{Judy}}}}}}} Thank you so much! Sorry that I've been "hibernating" for so long but I know that you especially understand because of your "anniversary" not too long ago. It's been a bit of an emotional roller coaster ride just as it is for so many of us that share this pain.

I knew you'd remember and be thinking about me, sending love and prayers because you're so very special and always there for everyone even through your own tears and sorrow. Please know that I've been thinking about and praying for you and yours, too. Judy, you always know just what to say using your words whereas I mostly rely upon images, songs and the like. Truly, you are a Treasure!

God Bless and Big Hugs!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Hi, Bubba! Sorry that I was gone so long. This is the first time I've turned on my PC since the last time I was here and as soon as I turned it on tonight, I did come straight to LS.

Thank you very much for your kind thoughts, prayers and hugs to Alex and me. It does mean the world. Hey, we can use all the prayers and hugs we can get, right? You bet. God Bless You and Yours!

Hugs, Love and Peace to You, Your Dear Wife, Willy, Lily and the Gang!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Hi Dottie, Hope you made it thru the week ok. I know you were dreading it. It's so very hard. I struggle each day still to try to move on. A lady I work with thought I was mad today. I said no just feeling a little sad. I miss my cat. She looked at me like I had lobsters crawling out of my ears. I cried on the way home again. Someone else said "have a nice 2 days off". I don't even look forward to my days off anymore. It's not the same. I sure you and others know how I feel. Just really wanted to say you have been in my thoughts.. Hugs.. Ann

{{{{{{{Jan}}}}}}} It's so very difficult for me to type through my tears. I love that song sung by Eva Cassidy and God rest her gentle soul. The photo is awesome! Awesome! Awesome! It goes so perfectly with that song and video.

I must confess that I'm sitting here right now, crying my eyes out and saying, "My God. This isn't happening. This isn't happening. This isn't happening." Over and over and over ... You see, that's where I was in my state of "hibernation" for the past couple weeks or so because I felt another breakdown coming on and it's how I get through it and remain normal and functional. I go into my "This is not happening" mode.

Jan, a couple days ago as I walked by Alex's nest box, I heard a very faint and quick "chirp" that Alex would make when he was either dreaming or waking and ready to come out of his nest box. I wasn't even thinking about him, however I did stop to listen and see if any other sounds came and none did. I feel that faint quick chirp may have been the sound of something else and I was mistaken.

Then a day or two ago while I was sitting at my sofa playing with Buddy dog and Styx kitty, I heard wings flapping for a couple seconds. Again, I wasn't thinking about Alex at all but it's the exact sound he made when he flapped his wings and the sound came from the direction of his cage. Was it something else I heard that just sounded like wings flapping? I know for certain that neither the chirp sound nor the wing flap sound were auditory hallucinations. So, no. They weren't hallucinations. I'll shoot a PM to you to explain. Wink and Nudge. Still, it could have been something else.

At one point within the last three days, the light fixture flickered again. Just one time only and stopped. This is the second time in 20 years that the light fixture in the dining area has ever flickered. Still, just that one time only and I was not sitting at the PC when it happened ...

Oh, I could go on and on but mostly I want to reach out, give you a HUGE HUG and kiss or your cheek and say THANK YOU! Alex loved that song so much sung by Eva Cassidy and I did sign into my YouTube account to add it to a "Playlist" I made with songs and videos in Tribute to Alex. I need go add the Miracle Day song videos you gifted to me and Alex. I love them both so much! Thank you, Jan! In fact, I'm going to go add those videos right now then come back.

Please know that you, Ziggy, Zita and all are in my thoughts and prayers, Hon!

Big Tight Hugs!!!

Always,
Dottie

PS. You owe me a box of Kleenex. More Hugs!!!

{{{{{{{Ann}}}}}}} God bless you, Dear One! I can only imagine what gawd awful pain you're feeling. I sure do empathize with you greatly. You know that for certain. As far as the lady at work not understanding, she could "walk a mile in your shoes" as the saying goes.

Oh, how you miss your fur baby and it's still so fresh in your mind just like yesterday. Why the heck does it have to take so gosh darned much time to get past this terrible pain, sorrow and grief? Rhetorical question, of course. You know what, Ann? This reminds me of a song ... Which is no surprise, I'm sure. Most things remind me of an image or song. Anyway, this is a very, very old song and I always even to this day cry my eyes out when one part of the song comes up even though I began crying like crazy when that part of the song came up before any great fur kid losses happened in my life and the song is ...

"Mr. Bojangles." Every time it gets to the part that goes: "He told me of a time working minstrel shows, traveling throughout the South. Spoke through tears for 15 years how his dog and he traveled about. His dog up and died, up and died. After 20 years he still grieves." My gosh. I'm crying right now just thinking about it.

I feel we'll still have tears in 20 years from losing our babies. Those special and unique fur babies and feather babies that left the biggest foot prints in our minds, hearts, souls and lives. Is it worth all this pain and suffering of having lost them? Absolutely! I cherish every moment I had. Still, that just don't make it any easier. Does it, Ann? I wish I could reach out and HUG you so big!!!

Big Tight Comforting Hugs to You and Yours!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

My God, Jan! That is so magnificent! I've never heard it before and the video is awesome along with the Quaker photo you chose to post with it. I've saved all to my files and YouTube Alex Tribute playlist. Thank You!!! Thank You!!! Thank you!!!

More Big Tight Hugs!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Yes, Jan! I've seen that one of Einstein the African Grey performing and love it! Love it! Love it! Many thanks, Hon. Awww! He's a "Super Star" and says so himself at the end of his performance. Awww! God Bless You! I have some others of Einstein. Have you heard him singing "Who let the dogs out?" So funny. Thanks again!

More Hugs!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Dottie

Just a quick note to say hi! I was worried about 'ya.

Back soon 'cause I gotta go right now.

Sending you lots of love and strength - your presence here is so appreciated!

Jan.

Hi Dottie - I really hope your tears are healing tears. I don't know why but that song wouldn't go out of my head and I knew it was for you, but really I don't know why.



You know I hate saying this because there is that faintest chance that Alex is alive, but I really do feel he is sending you signs. I had something like that with Zita, but mine were visual - out of the corner of my eye stuff, when I wasn't thinking about her. The most vivid I ever had was seeing her directly in front of me outside, and I wasn't thinking about her at all in that moment but she disappeared - it was like she faded away - as quickly as she showed up. I do think these experiences are very real and they are signs from our fur and feather babies telling us they are okay. Think of it from their point of view - they hate to see us suffer and would never want to cause that for us. I know I find myself going to sleep and hearing myself repeat over and over "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry." Of course I am talking to Ziggy, Zita also. No matter how I rationalize it my whole self says, "this should never have happened". But as you say, things are as they should be and the proof is that they are that way... I wonder when we have these thoughts if our Alex and our Ziggy are saying - please be at peace, I am there with you, I will see you again, don't despair. I told you about the dream I had about my dog who died when he was hit by a car - this was when I was 15 years old. He sent me a very clear message that he was happy, at peace and would be there for me whenever I needed him. I'm sure if it were easier Alex, Ziggy, Zita and all of our other fur friends in spirit would be giving us those messages. In fact they probably are...



Virtual kleenex on the way...

love Jan and my fuzzy bunch

Ann - I just have to repeat that those "looks" are entirely about "them" and not about you. You are one of the special sensitive souls who fully receive the love and joy of an animal. Think about how much those people who don't "get it" have missed in their lives - for all the pain we feel, we felt equal amounts of joy in their lives, this we must remember!

take care

Jan.

p.s. I was also thinking that we all really need to start educating these people about the sacredness of animals, and the real, deep grief we can experience in losing our pets. People need to stop giving those "looks" and instead understanding the special connection to the animal world!

For My Most Cherished Beloved Feather Child Alex. This song reminds me so much of you and me together. I really can't remember when you weren't there and I swear we've been through everything there is both good and bad. You never did let me down, my Very Best Friend. I can't even begin to count all my tears you kissed away. It got better and better every day and together we were strong. So very strong. The sweetest days I've found, I've found with you! My gosh, what ever did I do before you?

Alex, I want to say, "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!!!"

I chose this image of the computer and enhanced it. How much this reminds me of all the days and nights you and I spent at the PC laughing, crying, I would make images and you'd help by walking on the keypad sometimes. That was fun! I hope you like the flowers all around the room and at the PC in the image as well as the heart shaped moon with a loving Angel there. I really think you'd love the twinkling stars and would make your beautiful happy sounds. I can hear you still. This song is for you, My Precious Alex with all my Love and Many, Many Thanks and Big Kisses!!!

Yes, Jan. They were healing tears in a sense and you wonder why that song wouldn't go out of your head and you knew it was for me? Perhaps it's because Alex loved it so much. Honest and for true. I've never seen that particular video but Alex loved Eva Cassidy singing Fields of Gold, Somewhere Over the Rainbow, Songbird, Time After Time and a couple others. Wow! I kid you not.



I know you'll understand when I tell you it's my belief that when there's such a strong bond between two people, a person and an animal or two animals, they can still send signs while they are alive.
So, no. I haven't given up hope that Alex is alive but I have less and less hope that I'll ever see him again on this earthly plane. As for you and what you experienced with Zita, I believe you were either being given a sign or were visited, Jan. I truly do. Big Smile here. You bet!

Tons of Hugs and Lotsa Love to You and Your Fur Babies!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Hey there Dottie---------Glad to see U R back---------Hope U R doin ok.----------Talk atcha later,
Your buddy, Bubba...............

Hey right back atcha, Bubba! Great to see you, Dude. I'm still breathing and we know how that goes, don't we? We sure do. How are ya doin' Bubba? Thanks so much for coming by to say howdy. I truly appreciate that. I'll talk atcha later, too. You bet!

Hugs, Love and Peace to You, Your Dear Wife, Willy, Lily and all the Gang!!!

Your Pal Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

PS. The movie Forest Gump was on TV the other day and I thought of you. Besides Forest, I do believe that Bubba is my other favorite character in that movie. I'm smiling at you!

Hey Dottie---------Good to hear from you.I'll talk more later as I am out the door to work.I saw Forrest Gump the other day as well.I had forgotton about that Bubba till I saw the movie again.What a great movie.Catch ya on the rebound,

Forrest,Forrest Gump..............oops,I mean Bubba.................

Okie Dokie, Forest ... I mean Bubba. *Smiling at you!* We must have posted to each other at the very same time cuz I just now finished posting at your Shooting Star thread. I'll be sure to check back in on ya, Dude. Take care!

Big Hugs!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

PS. I love that movie, too. Lots and lots. *Another Smile!*

Hi Dottie

Here's another song for you! lotsa love... Jan.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTQfERb9HVk

(or the cute guy version)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vix4Of6_hZ0

I hope you Dance

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat
But always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small
When you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me you'll give faith a fighting chance

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Living might mean taking chances
But they're worth taking
Lovin' might be a mistake
But it's worth making
Don't let some hell bent heart
Leave you bitter
When you come close to selling out
Reconsider
Give the heavens above
More than just a passing glance

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
(Time is a real and constant motion always)
I hope you dance
(Rolling us along)
I hope you dance
(Tell me who)
I hope you dance
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
(Where those years have gone)

I hope you still feel small
When you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
Dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance
(Time is a real and constant motion always)
I hope you dance
(Rolling us along)
I hope you dance
(Tell me who)
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
I hope you dance
(Where those years have gone)

(Tell me who)
I hope you dance
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
(Where those years have gone)

Oh My Gosh! Jan, I gave that exact top video to someone here a while back and love that song so much. It's a Gift of many, many Wonderful Blessings and that photo of the darling, beautiful, Angelic bird "Dancing" which you chose is Awesome! Thank you!!! Thank you!!! Thank you!!!

And Jan, I Hope You Dance, Too!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

You are so welcome!

You do such wonderful images for everyone here that it's the least I can try to do! Mine aren't so magical as yours, wow, you do such a service to this forum.

take care and sending love and healing your way - woosh!

Jan.

Ahhhh, Jan. *Sniffle!* Thank you!!! Hey, you do a heck of a lot for people and I envy you and others how you're able to converse while I rely on images, songs and the like. It's okay to envy though. That's a huge compliment and you sure have earned and deserve a whole bunch more than that, Dear One!

Tons of Comforting Hugs!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Hehe - the "mutual admiration club". Thanks a lot Dottie!

Jan.

Hey Dottie--------Just got back from my 'Men who pause' gig and thought I would drop by and say hey.So hey.Hope yer doin just fine.talk atcha soon again,
Bubba..........

That's us, Jan: "The Mutual Admiration Society." I don't know if you've heard that song before. So cute. Hehehe!

Big Comforting Hugs!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Hey right back atcha, Bubba. I'm okay and sure as heck hope you're okay, too. I miss ya bunches, Dude.

Big Comforting Hugs to You, Your Dear Wife, Willy, Lily and all the Gang!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Hi Dottie-----I think I'm doin ok.Seems like a number of new people have joined the forum lately.This place sure has helped alot of us hasn't it? I assume you made it through your one year mark in one piece.I know it was very hard on you and I was thinking about you alot during your break from the forum.It probably did you some good being away so you could gather your own thoughts and find your own way to keep on the path till it's time to go.Every day I find I have to remind myself that this physical life has changed for good and I really have to take my own advice and slog through each 24 hour period knowing that it will change for the better when it is time.There are countless numbers of people who are going through the same thing you and I are experiencing concerning our babies.In a way this loss has made me re-prioritize and put value on the truely important things and delete the rest.I'm finding out just how much really does not matter as events and most people don't qualify as meaningful or important anymore,Just a select few starting with my wife.It actually (except on a couple of random occasions) has diminished my stress level and I just don't take much of anything too seriously anymore as it is all in passing and impermanent.I had a very clear visit for the first time in a dream from Willy.I'll have to tell you about it.Very telling about the reality his new existence and that he is young again.Comforting.I'm yapping too much here.Please let me know what's new and how you are,buddy!.........Your pal,
Bubba....................

Hey, Bubba. I've been doing a lot of reevaluating also. I do feel gosh awful for not keeping up with all the newcomers in the forum but my vision is getting better again so I hope to be able to start picking up as I have in the past. No, I ain't going blind or nothing. It's just that there are times that I can see so much better than other times and I'm also due to get stronger prescription glasses, me thinks. I have 3 different pairs of 3 different strengths that I use for 3 different purposes but my PC prescription glasses are "not as strong" as they used to be. Know what I mean? The other two pair are over the counter pharmacy glasses and, yada, yada, yada ...

Absolutely: Re-prioritize is a great word for it. I'm with ya. Also, I am back to using several different "coping mechanisms" which I used to use in my 20's and 30's. Great stuff and I'd love to share with you. I think you're the type who'd get into that sort of thing and it would work for you as well. Perhaps others here, too.

Oh Wow! You got visited by Willy! Oh Wow! He was young again like you said. I'll bet he was happy, healthy, frisky and more. Well, I sure hope so and ... Were you in the dream with him? I'm very excited to hear about your dream. Did I say Wow?! The last time I dreamed about Alex was ... Well, I can look up the exact day and it was within a month or 2 after he didn't come home. OMG! Bubba, you have got to hear about that dream. It was ... I did not know I was dreaming until I woke and ... Oh, it was incredible. I'll share that with you, too. Funny thing about that dream is that I vaguely remember my late Dad being there and my wonderful late Kenny being there and me greeting them sort of as a "by the way" type thing, but ... I went right to Alex. He was back here with me and ... I'll tell you later. It sure as heck knocked my socks off.

Please do share your dream with me when you're able. Again ... Yeah. I'm "okay" also. I caught that, Bubba. I heard and felt you especially after all the rest you said then I went back to you being "okay." Yes, I feel you, my good Pal.

More Hugs to You and Yours!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

PS. Now for me to copy all I just typed, enlarge it, put it on a blank email and check the spelling.

PS. PS. I'm typing from the enlarged print on that email now. Good dang thing cuz I could barely read what I typed. Oy. Sorry, but I am giggling about that. How embarrassing it would have been should I have sent it the way it was. You'd have thought me drunk, high or ... Hey. What's wrong with that? Never mind and more Hugs!!!