I love you, my sweet Trevor. XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Mommy

Oh Trevor's mom

Please don't shut us out. We love you just as much as you love Trevor. We want to share your heartache and try to support you as best we can. I'm sorry for anything hurtful I've said to you by mistake. Your love for Trevor and your lovenotes are just one more little way to connect with you.

Gretta's mom

Dear Jeanne,

You must have read an old love note, as I did say and do that for a little while, but I'm here to stay. And I'm sticking to my story.

Love You!
Bobbie

My dearest Trevor,

You know how hard today has been and I thank you for continuing to love me from afar and up close to my heart. I miss you more and more. But I know you are doing such good work in Heaven with all the newbies (like Mipo and the others) and all your relatives(Gretta, Rudy, Jasper, Birney, Kelly, Crocker, Spot & Squirt) and friends (Hermy) that I am so proud of you.

Mommy is going to bed now. I hope I dream of you tonight.

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Hello my wonderful Mr. Trevor!

The sun is shining and the flowers are starting to bloom like mad. It's 80 degrees outside and I think almost that hot inside. All of which means that Spring is here and anther season begins with you in Heaven and me struggling to wait for my turn to be with you.

I have stretched myself way too thin so will begin to learn how to take care of myself along with others. Going to be a difficult lesson since I'm used to taking care of others, especially wonderful doggies like you! And kittie and bunnies of course.

Have a wonderful evening together with all those million friends you've made so far. Don't forget the relatives, too.

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Good Morning my sweet little one!

It is strange to write to you during the day when my emotions are a bit more under control. The night hours were always our time because that's when the pain would really rear it's ugly head. I still miss sleeping on the floor at night, next to you and your softness and gentleness. But, then again, the sun and the cool air and the life springing up all over does help the soul feel a little better.

I will always miss you, my love of loves and thank you for being my inspiration and my teacher. Dreamer is such a good boy, except for the fact that now he has some competition in the house and the competition is older and quite a handful. Right now he and I are in a bit of an experiment to see who really does run the house. So far mommy is still on top because she has Auntie Cindy to help her and she has a longer range goal! Humans are. well Americans, are so goal oritented that I need YOU and all your brothers to keep sending reminders to SLOW DOWN AND ENJOY THIS LIFE.

Every day I read your Life Lessons and every day I say "Oh yeah". My brain's permanent mailbox is getting smaller all the time so I have to read over and over. But they are the best lessons for life there are. Maybe one day I'll repost them.

Have a super duper day today. Keep welcoming the newbies as everyone on LS reminds their people that they are OK and definitely not alone or suffering any more. And if you can find out and send me the answer as to why us humans keep you guys around even when the pain gets immense before we send you onto the best life, please do so!

I love you mu little C. Spaniel and always will!

XOMommyXO

Hello my little love bug,

Today is another angelversary and mommy doesn't even know how many weeks it's been. I do know that there have been too many weeks passing by without us being physically together. But, again, my wish for you is to continue to be healthy, happy and so very loving up in Heaven. I just want all the best things for you. Because you gave me the best of you every day we were together.

Your grandma wants to come visit you with me so I'll call her ASAP and we'll find a time.

I love you so much, Mr. Trevor, that my heart cannot grow big enough to hold it all. Have a beautiful day in Heaven and Gretta and Hermy and Tucker and all your friends whose names have temporarily fallen out of my brain. They'll be back as soon as I pick them up.

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

[/size]Dearest Trevor[/color]


[size="7"]HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!!!!!!


I love you!
XOMommyXO[color="#00FF00"]

OMG Trevor!

Now don't be scared! I don't know who let those snakes in to mess up a perfectly good St. Patrick's day wish, but when I find out you will the first to know.

I love you honey bunny (OK, so that's Easter). May God Hold You In The Palm Of His Hand!

XOMommyXO

Hello my sweet boy,

Well, another weekend is winding down and I love/miss you more than ever. It was a beautiful day today so we slept in and then did some shopping. Poor Pepper (I call him Mr. Dr. Pepper now). He doesn't like being in a crate either. But at least he's not as frantic as Dreamer was.

Thank you for being such a wonderful boy in my life. Our time together was incredibly short, but I wouldn't trade a day with anyone. This is going to be short tonight because I have to get downstairs and be with daddy for a while.

Please say HI! to everyone in Heave, esp. Gretta and Hermy and Peggy, etc.

I LOVE YOU MY DARLING, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

My Dear, dear Trevor,

Your mommy loves you with all her heart and soul, more today than ever before.

The sad news is that I am still exhausted and being pulled in too many different directions so that I don't even have stamina to write notes or letters. My doctor, your daddy and my good friend all told me to STOP doing everything for everyone else and START doing for me. And I'm going to listen to them because one of the most important things I LOVE to do is visit you and write to you. I just have one more day.

I love you, Trevor! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
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Hi Bobbie

Sending my love to the rainbow bridge to your baby Trevor. Where I am today it is a beautiful sunny day so hopefully it is for our babies too.

I agree with your doctor and husband....take some time to do things for yourself. People like you are wonderful people for always thinking of others first but there comes a time when you need a break and should just think about yourself. So enjoy it. Trevor would want you to have some you time.

Sending my love to you.

xxForeverxx

Dear xxForeverxx,

Thank you so much for your kind message and rememerance of Trevor. I almost feel that after while people lose interest in us because there are so many new people suffering the awful loss that you and I have gone through. But I keep going because I want the world never to forget Trevor. That is one thing I promised him as he was dying: that he would NEVER be forgotten and that is one reason why he is buried in a private Humane Society cemetery with all his brothers.

Trevor had so many needs and a great need to be understood. Once we did know what was truly going on in his brain and spine and all the incredible pain he was dealing with, silently as much as possible except when it became excrutiating, we promised him the best life possible, every single day. I am sorry to say I did not always live up to my promises, but I tried. And I am human and I know that Trevor was a Spirit dog who could do so much better. One thing, for sure, we always loved each other and stood up for each other. Well, I stood up for Trevor and gave him as much "normal" joys as possible. He loved smelling every balde of grass on both sides so our walks were actually more like "meanders" which could take a long time and get nowhere, but I didn't care. He actually got to the point where he would try to wag his tail a couple times, but his poor squished brain didn't remember much.

I just feel so awful when any animal has to suffer like Trevor did in the end. I probably should have ended things earlier, but I just thought I could give him more quality time. I now know that this was completely selfish on my part and Trevor gave me the ultimate gift of staying with me, through all his agony, until I was as ready as I was going to be. That is why I still love him so, so much and that love grows every day. So I hope you all don't mind that my love notes continue every day, but it is absolutely necessary to pay the honor to the bravest little dog that ever lived.

Gotta go no, my eyes are leaking badly and in public.

Blessings.............
Bobbie

My Dear Bobbie,

I could never, ever, ever, forget you and Trevor, (well, for one thing Mickey wouldn't let me.) Can't you just see those two playing together and then joining in all the fun with all the other fur/feather babies.

Bobbie, you did your very best for Trevor and I believe the Good Lord was guiding you when to let him go. So don't feel bad about anything and try to get some much needed rest. Do what you enjoy even if it is just writing love letters to Trevor. I always enjoy your letters to Trevor.

We will always love you, Trevor Forever........We love your mommy too...

(((((Hugs))))

LoveMyMickey

Dear LoveMyMickey,

Thank you so much for your sweet letter and assurances that Trevor will never be forgotten. That he has made such an impact on so many lives after his death is a testament to his life on earth. When one talks about Profiles in Courage (I don't know if you are old enough to know about that book or not.) I put Trevor as first and last story. And your Mickey is right up there, too. As are so many, many creatures that love us faulty humans.

I am not looking for sympathy when I write some of the messages to Trevor. Nor do I look for replies. But I am blessed by those of you who take the time to support an old lady who is not as strong as she thought she was. And I mention every one of you in my nightly prayers. OH! and your furbabies, too!

I think it is time to repost Trevor's Life Lessons. I read them every day and think of how he was the perfect example of every one. I try hard, but don't come anywhere near where I should be on the list. But it is a good, gentle reminder of Trevor and of how we really could live our lives.

Again, LoveMyMickey, thank you for your love and support. You ARE always there when we all need you. May you enjoy a perfect day and please give my love to Mickey!

Blessings......................
Bobbie

Dearest Trevor,

Another monthly anniversary is fast approaching and I don't know how many this old broken heart can take. I miss you like the dickens and there doesn't seem much that I can do about it. So I have your pictures everywhere and have even called the newest guy "Trevor" (along with many other of your brothers' names). I have not brought Pepper to meet you yet because he is too strong for me to handle along with Dreamer and I cannot leave Dreamer alone at home. That's not right.

Tomorrow is devoted to YOU! I am going to complete as much of the Pet Berevement Study as possible. There are just a few questions, but we have been encouraged to provide as much information as we feel comfortable doing. And you know that I will tell anyone our entire story any time. This will help me greatly to put my thoughts and feelings into some kind of order so that when I write the manuscript about living with sick animals (dogs) I will have some good information already. the rest will come from my heart and yours, too.

Trevor, I don't know how I lived without you before and I am still having trouble living without you now. You were/are the greatest dog to ever come into my life. There will never be any better. It is time to go review your Life's Lessons so I can post them once again for the newbies. Yes, I can be pushy, but these lessons are invaluable and need repeating.

Please have a wonderful night with Gretta, Hermy, Mickey, Chewy, Ginger and all those amazing fur & feather babies that are with you in Heaven. Don't forget your brothers either!

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

My dear, sweet, innocent boy,

Today marks EIGHT MONTHS since you've been gone. I simply cannot believe how time keeps moving forward so quickly now. It seems like you went to Heaven just yesterday and yet we've been apart for my birthday, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's, Valentine's Day and St. Patrick's Day. So many times to celebrate together and yet we can't really do that.

I am so glad that Hermy's grandma saw you in her dream and you and Hermy we healthy and fine. That is so resaauring. I just wish I could see your beautiful face in my own dream(s). I am starting to write about out relationship for the Pet Bereavement Study and I don't think I know the right words to describe how deep and trusting it was. The longer we knew each other and the more we loved and took care of each other the more intense our relationship became. Day after day, up until that last moment when you were crying out as the poison was flowing in your vein. I will never forget almost crawling over Dr. Sorrells to get to you and comfort you for that last few seconds you had on this earth. I NEVER wnted that to happen, but some things we cannot control and, of course, hindsight is 20/20. I will use that awful experience so that none of my other boys ever have to go through what you did. See? Even in dying you taught mommy some valuable lessons. You are the best.

I need to go to sleep now as I must get up early in the morning. Have a great night with every single one of your family and friends, new and old.

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Good Afternoon Mr. Wonderful (that's you, Trevor)!

Oh, how could I ever think there would be a moment when I didn't love and miss you so much? It hasn't happened yet and I don't think it is going to happen - ever! You are the most wonderful C. Spaniel EVER! I know you were sent to me to be my teacher-angel and you did one heck of a job even though I wasn't a very bright student.

But I loved you every single moment that we had. And I MUST apologize for keeping you alive and in pain so much longer than you deserved to be. That was complete and utter selfishness on my part. I am so sorry, Trevor, so, so sorry. Would you find it in your heart to fogive me (again)? I promise you that, even though it will be totally impossible, I WILL release Dreamer and Pepper from their pain and sufferings EARLY ON, if, GOd forbid, they do not die of simple old age. I think that is part of your legacy, Trevor, that I have learned not to make my companions suffer because of my inability to see and accept what is going on. That is my promise to you.

It's coming up on your cousin, Gretta's one year Angelversary and I know that is going to be very difficult for Auntie Jeanne. So we (including Gretta) have to come up with some way of letting her know that 1) she is not alone (we know that in our human brains, but our hearts lag way behind) 2) Gretta is not alone nor will she ever be 3) there will be a Heavenly celebration on her Anniversary of joining the Forever Angel Dogs. Help me, Trevor, my mind is fried and frazzled lately.

Have a good rest of the day, honey, and I'll catch up with you later!

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Hi Bob

Love My Mickey wrote these words in response to my verses of asking Gretta for forgiveness for not realizing she was sick and in pain for so long and for leaving her at the vet school on her last night on earth. They SO touched my heart and I hope they touch yours - because Trevor is saying the exact same thing to you:

Oh Mommy in the end, as always
Nothing that you did wa wrong
No matter where I was I felt it
Your love for me was oh so strong.

Oh,mommy,mommy please don't worry
For there is nothing to forgive.
A life of peace and joy and gladness
Is what I want for you to live.

Our hearts will ALWAYS be broken over the separation from our spirit-dogs.

God bless you for always being with me during my life with Gretta and then during our separation. You taught me SOOOOOOOOOOO much. I could never have done (nor would I ever have wanted to) it without you, your love, and your love for God's creatures, especially dogs.

Talk to you soon.

Gretta's mom

Good Night my beautiful prince. Mommy loves you so very much - more today than ever before. May God continue to bless you and all your friends and relatives in Heaven.


I LOVE YOU, TREVOR! with all my heart and soul
XOMommyXO

Hello my wonderful Trevor!

I am so sorry that I didn't write anything last night. But you know that my heart, soul and thoughts were with you all the time. We went to Olivia's birthday, just daddy and me and we got to meet her new litle brother, Ben. He's so cute and just a month old, so daddy played with Olivia and I held Ben for over 2 hours!

Yesterday turned out to be beautiful and today and sunny, but very windy. I don't know when I'll all Grandmom, probably towards the end of the week. We really do have to get out to visit you and put all the Easter stuff out for you.

I am going to start answering the 3rd question in the Pet Berevement sutdy and that is going to be incredibly difficult for me to do without my eyes leaking constantly. Would you mind helping me as I go along? I knew you would, but it's always polite to ask.

Please have a fun and lively day today with EVERYONE. You do know how to have a good time and I'll be so happy knowing that you are having loads of fun!

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Mr. Trevor,

You keep me going when times are tough. You show me the way with your eyes. Those beautifu, beautiful eyes of yours. I thank God that I was able to capture their love and devotion with a silly little digital camera and no flash. Thank you for allowing me that honor and continuing pleasure. Trevor, I don't know what I would have done without you in my life nor what I would do now in knowing that I can always ask, "What would Trevor do?" Many people would find that just rediculous. I don't because you have taught me so, so much. And I miss you more and more everyday.

Today has been a very difficult day and it's at times like this that I wish we were together. NOT down here where you would be suffering, but in Heaven where we could share our endless love and devotion to each other. I know that sometimes it must sound like I am writing a love letter to your daddy, but it's different and we all know that. If you have the time, please send just a little ray of hope in my direction. It would help a lot.

Have a good night cuddling with Hermy, Gretta, Mickey and everyone whose names slip my mind right now. Don't forget those non-remembered and also the newbies, especially those who have suffered greatly to get to Heaven. I know you don't need reminders. It's us humans that need to see the reminders to be comforted in their sorrow.

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

HI Trevor and Trevor's mom

Whatever little bits of love and support and uplifting and help we can offer, we'll just keep right on doing that - because of what Trevor taught us. His rules of life are posted on my front closet door. Here's one especially worth remembering: #7 - Keep trying. Someone will come along to help.

Here's a little ray of sunshine from Gretta and Rufus and me today.

We love you.

XOXOXOXO Gretta and rufus and their mom XOXOXOXOXOXO

Hi Trevor!

It's getting late tonight and mommy is very tired and even sadder than before. I'm counting on your love and loyalty to see me through this awful time. But please don't worry. I will never, ever stop loving you, missing you or thanking you for being in my life. That is promise I can keep.







I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Hello my sweet little boy,

Ah, tomorrow is yet another Friday anniversary for you and Hermy. I wonder how you celebrate them up in Heaven? Down here I just love you more and more and more. My love just continues to grow for you and the brothers that are with you in Heaven and the two rascals we have here on earth. Would you please tell Kelly that we renamed Pepper to Kelley? I added the extra "e" so there would never be confusion in the future.

Trevor, I run out of words to express my love and devotion to you and my gratitude for all you did for me in such a short time. However, I will never run out of the actual love, devotion, gratitude and loyalty to you. They are yours forever. I wear your locket 24/7, along with a cross that daddy gave me and it gives me such comfort each and every day. I must touch it 50 times a day or more and I feel so close to you. No words, just feelings.

Please have a rest-filled night, everyone gathered together in love. What else does there need to be?

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Hello my sweetness!

Mommy has been sick all day and still isn't feeling very well. So tonight will be a quick, but very sincere "I love you and miss you with all my heart, Trevor!"



I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Hello my sweet boy,

Mom didn't feel good most of the day so laid low. That gave me a lot of time to think of you and remember what a wonderful boy you were and still are. I cannot believe that time continues to march on, making day after day separate the time we were together on this earth (which was so good and so bad) and the time you have been in Heaven. I remembered every single detail about your burial and how I knew my heart would never stop breaking, even though the tears might slow down a bit. I still see the light blue soft blanket that held your precious body lying on the ground next to your grave. OH! How I did not want you to go into that hole all alone, even though Jasper's remains were below you. I and Grandmom vowed that not one piece of earth was going to touch your body until it happened naturally in the future. So we lined your grave with your favorite comforter, placed so many momentoes, toys, bones, etc. along the hole and, when Daddy and Grandpop lowered you into that final resting place, they gently covered your body with a beautiful blue spread. Auntie Jeanne sang a special song and I still have all the messages we read to you. Has that happened so many months ago? I hope it seems like just a second gone by for you in Heaven. I am OK with serving "time" here on earth because I know that you and I will be together again one day.

Trevor, I say your name so often so that you will know that I will never, ever forget you. I love the sound of your name.......Trevor. Grandmom gave you a magnificent name, didn't she? None better.

I have to go to bed now. You know I still sleep with your picture next to my heart. I added Rudy's awhile back because he looked like he needed me, too.

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Trevor-Forever

Thank you for taking such good care of your mommie. You are her heart and she is yours. I'd take away all the hurt from her heart, but you know I can't. Only being together again in the perfect World will do that. Until then, play with Gretta and welcome all the new arrivals, especially those who didn't have a mom or dad here on earth,

I love you, too, Trevor.

Aunt Jeanne (Gretta and Rufus's mom)

Happy April Fool's Day, Trevor! (and Palm Sunday)

I decided not to play any April Fool's Day pranks today. I don't know why. I just wasn't in the mood. How was your day? I often wonder what you and all your buddies DO in Heaven all day. I'm sure you must watch all of us struggling through our days and even some of us taking most of the day for granted. Do you ever get exasperated with us? Do you miss us and maybe even cry a little? Probably not - Heaven is so wonderful and you have knowlege about the future already so why be sad? right? I hope that, not only you, but all your brothers can still brag a little about how much we all loved each other. And I still do. But you were the one who taught me some of the most important life lessons there are. You taught me to be extra patient when times get tough for my boys. You taught me to love each boy as an individual and give each boy what THEY need, not what I need. You even taught me to go out in my pajamas in the morning with them! It's my yard and I only wear old-lady pajamas, so who cares?

Please look for Skipper. He's been up in Heaven a few days and I know you are probably fast friends already. You know, I only know of one bunny (Hermy) in your group of doggies and kitties. Would you send me some names beccause I'm sure Hermy could use some buddies. I know there are some good bunnies up there. I just don't remember their names. I must start making a list. You don't need the list because you are in the midst of a huge love-fest every single day.

Thank you for loving me, Trevor. You are my best buddy.

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Hello my dear sweet Mr. Trevor,

It was good to be back at the cemetery today, putting up all the Easter decorations and changing your Beanie Baby doggie guardians. When I left the place was looking a lot better than it had in awhile. I'm sorry that I didn't stay longer, but I had many things to do today. Grandmom and I will come soon and stay for a nice long visit.

I am also continuing to answer the questions for the Pet Berevement Study. That takes me a very long time to answer even one question. Today's answer is describing the time preceding your death and, oh my, that is so very hard to do. My eyes keep leaking and I keep weeping that I don't get much written. I wrote 4 pages today and we're not even close to the actual "event" yet. I want to get every word in so that people will truly understand the emotions involved with saying good-bye to you.

Trevor, I think my blood sugar is really low right now so I am going to check it and take care of things. I love you sooooooooooooo much and will write again in the morning.

XOMommyXO

Dear, dear Trevor,

Well, I got to brag about you again tonight at the Humane Society's monthly pet berevement support group meeting. I even read and handed out copies of your Life Lessons which everyone agreed were awesome.

Trevor, I have no idea how empty my life would have been if you had not come into it, especially when you did. I am positive that we would not be where we are today, had you not come along. So many reasons and purposes that we often realize too late. All I can say is that you saved my life by giving yours. You are the best!

Have a good night and look for Nicky aka Nicodemus. I just learned of his passing in 2010 tonight and his mom is a terrific person.

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Hello my Hunny Bunny (remember Hermy!)!

I love you so much and miss you even more. I am very sad and tired tonight so am going to take your picture and place it next to my heart and go to sleep.


I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Hi Bobbie, Hope you dont mind me writing on here.
JUst wanted to let you know I am keeping up with your posts on here and thinking of you Your study answers are greatly appreciated, more than you can ever know!
I'm in the literature review section at the moment and loving every second of the research I'm doing. Also I thought I'd let you know that those who I''ve shown your photo of Trevor to have all agreed wholeheartedly at his gorgeousness! I'm definetly going to include it in the final report.
Xx

Hooray! Another proof of how special a dog Trevor IS! We'll see you soon, my friend.

You go, Bob. The world - eespecially the dog world - needs you.

XOXO
Gretta and Rufus's mom

Dear Lucie and Gretta's mom,

Thank you for your kind words and compliments. We (Trevor and I) are honored that you would want to put his picture in the report, Lucie! I'll have to get working harder on the next questions. Like I said, I just want to get every single thing about Trevor that I can down on paper. I am not very good finding words to adequately describe my feelings, but I keep trying and using theThesaurus a LOT! If you would have known Trevor, you would have LOVED him. Those few lucky people that did (his grandparents and Cindy, my trainer and advisor and my sister) fell fast and hard for him. I think he's just about the only dog in Heaven that has an earthly fan club!

Jeanne and Gretta, oh yes, we DO love you so much! And Trevor is sending his love to you and Rufie. I just wish that I could actually feel some of what he is sending to me or see him in a dream or something. Maybe I haven't because I am not ready yet. That's got to be it. After all, I spent 30 minutes on the office floor yesterday, sobbing, after completing the answer to Question #3.

BTW - Trevor, I love you and I need a LOT of help with these guys and their dad. They have forgotten everything about manners, where to properly pee and bark and how to walk like a civilized dog. I'm counting on you!

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Sending my love to Trevor at the bridge playing like a puppy

Hope you are being treated well today Bobbie.

xxForeverxx

Dear xxForeverxx,

Thank you for your lovely message and god wishes! Today I am in the hospital with some sily mild and short chet pain. But we must milk the insurance system for all it cn, so I have a privatr rom for the night. DO NOT WORY, I am simply completely out of condition and need to finaly start taking care of this old body. Hey! That sounds like a good T.V. showfor my generation!

Hapy Easter! and Trevor loves you, to!
Bobbie

Dear Bobbie,

I am so sorry you had to go to the hospital. I hope you are doing okay by now. I know you have been under TOO much stress and I want you to take care of yourself.

Trevor, please get your Guardian Angels to look out for your mommy and pray that she will be okay.

Bobbie, you are in my thoughts and prayers...God Bless...

((((HUGS))))

LoveMyMickey

Hello Trevor!

Well, it seems that your Mommy has some very good and kind angels watching over her as well. Thank you LoveMy Mickey and xxForeverxx and, of course, Gretta's mom for the good wishes, that came true this afternoon. I am now home and on a computer where I can see what I am typing so the mistakes will be far less than last night! But, at least there was the Internet when I could not sleep all night. Passed the stress test and blood work, so just have to find out why I am anemic and start actually getting into shape. I never usd to have to do a thing, exercise, watch what I ate or didn't eat, etc. It all came naturally. Well, them days are over. Your Mommy is going to have to sit down and really make a realistic plan for LIFE.

I thought about you a whole lot last night and you truly did help me get through an awful night of thirst, noise and insomnia. Not so tonight. I am going to bed right this minute. Have a wonderful night and day in Paradise, Trevor. You know you are the best!

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

[size="6"] HAPPY EASTER, TREVOR!!!!!!! AND HAPPY EASTER TO ALL HIS FAMILY AND FRIENDS IN HEAVEN AND ON EARTH!!!!!![/size]

Dear Trevor,

Wasn't that the most bizzare letter I wrote to LoveMyMickey??? And your Easter Greeting didn't turn out so well, either.

I'm done being sick and want to remind you that Gretta's one-year Angel-versary is tomorrow, so get the gang together and celebrate with her and send love to her mommy (she is your aunt, you know)

I LOVE YOU MORE THAN EVER, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Hi Bobbie and Trevor and ..... everybody

Please join me in a big happy Angel-versary for Ms. Gretta, the kindest chocolate lab who ever lived. Thank SOOOOOOOOO much for all the help and comfort you've sent down over the past months. Both your mom and I feel it so often.

Thanks Trevie-boy

Hello my sweet boy!

Mom misses you a whole lot tonight, but tonight I want the 1 - year Angel-versary party for Gretta to come to a rousing end (whenever that is)! I can't even imagine what you and Hermy and Gretta and Mickey and all the other boys and girls are planning for you! That's probably a good thing, too because then I would want to be there with you!

Trevor, mommy is trying really hard to follow your life lessons, which are so simple and "right on", and yet so difficult for me to follow, day after day after day. I just don't have the stamina, determination and Godliness that you had, but I keep hoping. I love you, my sweetness, more and more every minute. And your picture is going to be published! I don't know where yet, but I am so proud of you! I'm going to spend a lot of tomorrow working on the Study questions.

I'm going to go to bed now and hold your picture so very close to my heart. That's the best I can do for now.

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

And, Bobbie, that's all you have to do! It's the BEST thing to do.

Gretta's mom

Dear, Dear Trevor,

I know this is a silly and rhtorical question, but why did you have to go? I really, really am gld that you are no longer hurting anywhere and are very happy with your brothers, cousins and friends in Heaven and I wouldn't want it any other way. But I miss you so badly down here on this piece of dirt we call earth. I miss that warmth of your breath, I miss the softness of your fur/hair/whatever, I miss the varied and always wonderful expressions in your eyes and I truly miss those small attempts (that were HUGE attempts for you) to wag your tail when we came home.

I also know that the boys you have lead to our house are special in their own ways and may require some of the patience and understanding that you taught me all about. Today I just don't have that in me. Dreamer and Kelley love me, that I know. But Kelley hasn't been given enough of a chance. I must be more consistent with him with his tethering and I must let the two of them "duke" it out over who gets which toy and who takes the other's toy out of his mouth! I'm not very good at that. And I'm certainly not used to a barking, barking boy!

I you have a minute, would you mind sending mommy a bit of extra courage and help today? I'd much rather you just enjoy yourself and have the fun you were missing for so many years down here. But if you have a second? Thanks so much, my love of loves.

I'll write more tonight. I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Dear Trevor,

Your Grandmom came to visit you yesterday and brought flowers! I'll bet you were pleased as punch! She is an incredible woman isn't she?

I'm wondering why missing you doesn't get even a drop better for me. I guess I won't know the answer until we are together again. I hurt so much. I never knew a heart could continue to shred for so long, nor a soul feel so battered day after day. And, although I DO love Dreamer and Kelley and delight in their antics and cuddle with them whenever we can, I still miss you as much as that last day we had together and the tears still fall as freely from these leaky old eyes. Trevor, you are the delight of my life. I will always be angry (never at you) for the horrid, painful life you had to endure before we met up and perhaps that is why I still feel such despair.

I love you, Trevor and will so until my dying breath. Then I will be happy to know that you and I and all your brothers will be together forever. I know God has a special plan for you and me. Now, I must get busy and do my share down here. To give love as you so freeely gave it. I miss you my Trevor boy. And I love you more than I knew I ever could!

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Trevor, I have a question that has puzzled me from time to time. If a person loves an animal and misses that animal when he/she dies more than other persons, what are the repercusions (sp)????? Would you mind asking around and see what answers you come up with and I'll do the same.


Thanks, my sweet boy!

XOMommyXO

Dear Trevor (and Hermy),

Well, today is yet another Friday in the long, long grief journey. I don't even know how many this makes any more, Mr. Trevor. I feel very badly for that, but even remembering the months is so hard to do. Auntie Jeanne made it through Gretta's one-year Angel-versary, but I make no guarantees about ours, except that I will do nothing to embarass you, Trevor. I will honor your memory and your name with love, dignity and grace. We do have a little bit of time to plan ahead, too.

I hope you are having a wonderful day with all your buddies and relatives in that Glorious Place you now call home. Please make a special effort to welcome, console and help all those millions of animals that die every second of every day in the name of "Experimentation". They really didn't deserve their punishment and virtually have no one to remember them except a few of us down here. Please reassure every single one of them (past, present and future) that your Mommy is thinking of them all the time.

Gotta go for now. But, once again, I love you more than I ever thought possible. And that's all because of YOU!

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO

Dear Auntie Bobbie

This is your niece Gretta. Trevor told me about your question. If I get it, it means what happenes when a human's dog leaves earth and goes to the Perfect World and the mom or dad on earth missies this doggie more than she would have or has ever missed a person. Aunt Bobbie, I hope you won't think I'm bragging or being smart-alecky. What that means is that animals' love for their moms and dads is not the same as people's love for each other. Long ago people learned how to talk and just a little later they learned that they could lie - that other people would believe their words even though they weren't true. About the same time, they learned to be selfish and then, eventually, to actually HATE other people. Some of us here talk about a Demon or Devil that tricked his way into the earth and made people do these things. But we animals see things differently. People must not be able to see this Demon, but we animals can see it plainly - and we run it off with tooth and claw when it tries to sneak into our Perfect World.

Since we animals don't know how to have these selfish, hateful thoughts and don't bother to say things that aren't true - because we all know it anyway, I think the love of animals is purer and more honest and, what do people say, unconditional. Some animals here say that some people call it love when what they really mean is "I'll be nice to you cuz then someday you'll do something for me." We don't GET that! The closest word we have for that is "commerce." Definitely NOT love.

When animals love humans, it's real, it's complete, it's whole and it's forever. When we go to the Perfect World, our poor mommies and daddies are left with only people around them - and people's love, with very few exceptions (I learned that word from a very smart Boxer up here!) is really only buying and selling. Professor Boxer said that was called investment. I don't know about that since we animals don't have such a word or even such an idea.

I'm not very smart. On earth some people get a big lauch by saying the us labs aren't the sharpeest knife in the drawer (whatever that means, but when they say it they usually laugh in a sort of unkind way), but this is what one chocolate lab thinks about your question. I hope this helps, Aunt Bobbie. You know Trevor loves you, I love you, all my cousin doggies and two singing birds and all our friends (which is everyone here) loves you and wants the sun to shine in your heart. We promise - because we KNOW this for sure - we WILL be together again after a while. And this time it will be even better because we will understand each other's words.

Trevor and Rudy and Birney and Kelly-one-E and Crocker and Spot and Squirt and me are all joining paws and surrounding your heart with furry, soft protection - and love.

Any more questions? This lab will try her best to answer them or go visit Professor Boxer and see what he says.

Good night, sleep tight. Up here even bed bugs don't bite!

XOXO
Your niece Gretta

Dearest Trevor and Gretta,

Thank you for your wonderful message, Gretta. It's amazing how those answers just float down from Heaven.

Trevor, there is a little Chihuahua who is suffering from CHF and may be arriving soon, so please look out for him. I don't know his name, but you and Gretta will. I hope you had a good day. I did. I got an elephant off my back today and it's such a relief. I'll tell you about it tomorrow.

Thank you for being my one and only! You KNOW you are the BEST!

I LOVE YOU, TREVOR!
XOMommyXO