I hope that, for now...............this is a good beginning...... Thank you!!! **********
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Dear Ernie-Bird:I cannot believe that it was 10 months yesterday, since daddy and I made the decision that the time had come to send you to Rainbow's Bridge.... You fought a great fight, my sweet daughter...
You will always be Mommy's best girl..... A love as strong as the love we shared, CAN NEVER, EVER BE BROKEN!!!!!!!
First, you went through having half your thyroid removed.......when you were around 15 & 1/2 years old.....And, we put you on Tapazole......(I mixed it in the juice of your fancy feast......but, I knew that you knew!! )
And, when you were in your 18th year, you developed kidney disease..... We changed your diet around.... And, we
did what we could......
When you lost weight (from 12/2003 - 2/2004), you lost 25% of your weight......8.2 pounds.....to 5.9 pounds........
Where was mommy's robust 16 pound baby girl????
But, I know when you get older..........you lose weight.......and, that was just fine......
You were sooooooo frail, and we were so careful when we picked you up....
God was sooo generous Ernie, in that you and I got to spend 19 years and 10 months together, sweet girl..
We went through sooooooo much together, my baby girl.........didn't we????
But..........I know, deep within my heart..........that you are okay.....my sweet Ce-Ce....
I knew that when you had lost sooooo much weight, and your vet at that time.....said we could give you 100 ml of liquid everyday........but, dad & I went to the vet's office, and they did it....
I thought........"I don't think our sweet girl wants this type of life"..........
You were soooooooo tiny, and I couldn't imagine sticking you with a huge needle everyday to give you fluids........
The night before you went to Rainbow's Bridge (although, we didn't know it at that time), I stayed up with you all night.........
You tried to go in the box.........and you couldn't pee or poo...........
You tried going all different places where you thought you might be comfortable......
But, you just couldn't go........
God knows how much my heart was breaking, Ernie Bird!!!
I loved you sooooooo much ever since that day I picked you out at that pet store in Boston, (June, 1984), when I saw about ten 6 week old kittens...................
All I had to see were your double paws, and that you were a precious Calico........
I was yours and you were mine!!!!!!
The next day, which was a Saturday (2/7/2004), I called the vet's office, and he happened to be in...........
(which was unusual, he was NEVER in on a Saturday!!)....
But, Ben and I brought you in.........
You were jumping and running around, and your heartbeat was over 300 beats per minute......
(which was nothing new for you....it was because of your thyroid disease...)
Our vet had said that since you had lost soooooooooooooo much weight, that you were in the beginning stages of
starving yourself.........
And, he said that that was a very, very painful thing for animals to go through....
You weren't drinking nor eating............
I'll never forget............daddy bought you all the wet food that you loved...........and, just to "HEAR YOU LAP UP A FEW BITS, WE WERE SOOOOOOOOOO EXCITED.....
I remember that we'd open up 10 cans at a time...... (in hopes that you might have just a little)......
When daddy and I decided that "it was time"..........the vet went and got two injections.........and your front paw had already been shaved.........
I knew that your little body had had enough, sweet Ernestine....... Your little body was sooooooooo tiny, sweet baby..... and, we always picked you up with such care......
You were sooooooooo very, very tiny, and your bones just stuck out.......... We held you soooooo tenderly, so as not to ever hurt you....
Your violent retching, at least 8 times per day, was enough for me.........
Even though I wore ear plugs at night, (because the city is so noisy), I could always hear when you got sick..... Mommy was there for you, baby girl!!!
I was in pain, watching your little body contort into all these positions.... It broke my heart!!!!
And, when you went to the bathroom to lap up the water from the tap.............I knew that your esophagus must
be burning from all of your vomiting..............
And, that the cool water must have been so soothing........
I was crying sooooooo much more by this time, and daddy was just starting to cry......
After you had gone to Heaven, and into the Loving arms of St. Francis........... Daddy and I looked at our
precious girl........I think that our tears could have filled a pond......
I could touch you all over..........."your shell" didn't hurt......
Even though mommy is from the "humam" medical field............I crazily thought to myself.............."Okay, take that stuff out of her veins, I want her back now.........."
I kept wanting to hold you.............to love you............
And, daddy explained to me that "you weren't there anymore...............that your soul (and, what a beautiful soul), had gone to Heaven".......
What was in front of me, at that time, was "your shell".......on the veterinarian's steel table......
On the way home, sweet Ernestine, I couldn't stop crying... It felt as if the tears were coming from the absolute bowels of my soul.... I was a mess!!!!...............
Daddy said to me, as he was crying while driving...........
"Honey, I don't often visit my mom or dad's graves anymore......because,THEY ARE NOT THERE..........
He continued.........."They will always live on............(he pointed to his chest) in here, (and, pointing to his head), and, in there".........
I will never, ever forget them.......
And, you and I.........We will never, ever forget our sweet Ernestine.........
Ernie-Bird
...............If it wasn't for Ben (your dad & mom's husband).............and, Lightning - Strikes, I am not sure where I would be......
I will always LOVE YOU, WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING......
And, I thank you, sweet girl, for watching over Ms. Lucy and Mr. Yoster..........
(I knew that when I picked out Lucy...........YOU HAD YOUR BIG DOUBLE PAW IN IT ALL THE TIME.......DIDN'T YOU???)
You and Lucy are almost identical, except you had more white fur on your chest.......
And, she has diabetes and asthma, Ernestine............I know that you sent her to mommy and daddy, because you know that we would take very, very good care of her!!!!
Mr. Yoster is well.............he probably needs a dental cleaning in the next few months.....
This is the best I can do right now, Ernie.........without short-circuiting the computer, with my tears.....
And, I also know that "you had your paw in mommy & daddy purchasing this computer"........ I truly believe that, sweet
girl...............
We ordered this DELL in December........and received it in January............
You, my sweet girl, were put to sleep in February 7, 2004..........
If mommy didn't have a computer, and you were gone.............."HOW WAS I GOING TO CONTACT ALL THESE WONDERFUL PEOPLE AT LIGHTNING-STRIKE, ERNESTINE???????"
I TRULY BELIEVE THAT YOU HAD ONE OF YOUR BIG, BEAUTIFUL DOUBLE PAWS IN THIS TOO, MY SWEET!!!!
I loved you sooooo much in 6/84; the very minute I saw you, behind the glass cage,
and when I held you...........FORGET IT.....YOU WERE IN MY HEART AT THAT SECOND!!!!!!.......
and, we loved you just as much when IT WAS RIGHT to help you to go to Rainbow's Bridge on February 7, 2004....
2/7/2004 was A VERY, VERY HARD DAY CE-CE.......but, you were at peace.........and, we knew that you were not suffering any longer..........
I cried for a very, very long time, after you were gone..........but, we were sincerely happy that you were no longer in pain, our sweet girl.....
You were in soooooooo much pain......
IT WAS SUCH A GIFT TO KNOW THAT YOU WEREN'T SUFFERING ANY LONGER, ERNIE!!!!
GOD BLESS YOU ALWAYS, MY SWEET BABY GIRL...........
When I get to Heaven, I'll be looking for you.........Don't forget to greet me and/or daddy....whoever gets there first,
okay??????
We both love you, Ernie-Bird!! **AFFA**
Love, Mommy xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
P.S. You won't be here this year to share the Christmas Holidays, sweet baby girl....... I have a few pictures, of
you, when I would open a gift, and then put the ribbon and bow on your head.......
You would look at me as if to say, "Okay mommy.........would you please take this off now????"
Dear God...........we loved you sooooooooooooo very, very much!!!!!
