Early in the morning Amber got worse by the minute, I called my daughter and told her to come over. Poor thing had done a double at work and was so tired. When she came I told her Amber had grown worse and we were going to have to take her to the vet as her little body was stiff and cold. I had her on the heating pad off and on during the night as the vet had instructed me to do, but it did no good. We could not get Amber to drink or eat after she came home and we had to force feed her but it was a struggle my husband and I couldn't get much in her.

When our 27 year old daughter rushed over she started crying so hard and flung herself into my arms and begged me not to have Amber put to sleep. She said there must be something else they could do for her baby but she did not have any more money. She looked at her dad and me with that same look that everyone had when we lost my son's Chili Bean. If I live to be 100 I hope to never see that look in my childrens eyes again.

My husband told her if there was anyway to save Amber we would pay for it so we made the 80 mile drive to the vet. We asked him if he could put her back into the hospital and try to save her life. The doctor felt it would not do much good since she was not better having just been released the day before. We told him we could not make any other decision than to try to save her so he agreed he would keep her.

So now Amber is back in the hospital with iv's again and is fighting for her life, should we have put her to sleep I just do not know. If she does not recover than my husband and I at least tried our best to help her. We hope there will not be another grave beside our Chili Bean, it has not even been 3 weeks since we lost her.

I am putting this picture on that I took of Amber last week, she looks so sick here but looks even worse now. I talked to the vet when some said I should sue the carpet cleaning company but he said there would be no way to prove thats what made her deathly sick and he would not be able to give me a letter stating that was the reason of her illness.

My husband Clair and I are just so sad, so troubled, we sit with broken hearts tonight feeling so weak and so distraught. Our daughter has cried herself to sleep at our house and we are just going to let her sleep instead of waking her up to send her home.
Ann

Dear Ann & Family:

I am so sorry.

Please know that you are all in my thoughts & prayers.....
I care about all of you.....and, I am very sorry that Amber is still very, very ill.

I KNOW that you all have been through soooooo much!!! And, for that, I am terribly sorry, Ann.....

Does your vet, (who I know that you love very much - because you drive 80 miles to see him), feel that
Amber is suffering terribly?

Do you feel that he expects Amber to pull through??

What are your true thoughts???

I know that you have probably heard this statement before...............but, after we put our sweet Ernestine to
sleep on 2/7/2004 at noon-time..........
I went through ALL THE EMOTIONS THAT WE HAVE ALL GONE THROUGH........

And, NOTHING IN THIS WORLD MADE SENSE TO ME, at that time........

Except, one loving member from LS wrote to me............

"Denise.....You took on Ernestine's pain SO THAT SHE COULD BE WITHOUT PAIN.....

And.........I UNDERSTOOD that, and I carried that sentence in my heart for a very, very long time....

By having our sweet girl put to sleep......SURE, I'd be in pain....but, Ernestine would finally be at peace....
I would do it again 1,000 times over!!!!

Always, we have to LOVE ENOUGH, to help our sweet babies move from this life to the next.....
Only you and your family will know when it's Amber's time.

And, I know that I'm not telling you anything that you don't know..

I'm just sooo very sorry that Amber has gotten so ill -- My heart is broken.
Please know that I am grieving with you and your family!

Love, Denise & Ben

Oh Ann. What a terrible year this one is turning into for us and our beloved furbabies.

I am with you. You know that. I have a struggling sickie here with me too.

Just know that you are not alone.

Ann,

I admire your strength.....you have been through so much in the last month and yet you are still standing! I am so sorry that Amber is not doing well, I wish there was something I could say......

Just keep hanging in there Ann...you are doing an amazing job supporting your kids (I'm sure they appreciate your strenght more than you know), and a wonderful job supporting and loving these sick little animals in your life.

Many prayers for you, your family, and your little furry ones.

Kristie

I have had very little sleep last night and when I did sleep I kept waking up with the sweats. I don't know if I was having night mares and just didn't remember them or what. I kept thinking of little Amber fighting for her life and so far away from home maybe thinking I had abandoned her.

Denise, the vet said he really does not know if Amber will pull through she is pretty bad. I did not ask if she is in a lot of pain I was afraid to ask but I believe she might be she looks so weak and so sick. My husband and I both feel that she deserves a few more days in the hospital. We may be wrong and perhaps we should have had her put to sleep but what if all she needs is the new medications they are giving her. What if we took away her life for nothing if she could get well with a few more days of treatment. We are torn as to what is right to do for Amber.

Steph, I hope that Falkor can overcome his sickness and stay with you for many more years to come. I don't know how many people after having lost one have the fear that the least sickness that comes upon our babies will end in death or not but I know I do. With the doctor's word that he did not believe Amber will pull through well it fills me with even more fear.

Kristie, Thank you for your words of encouragement it makes me want to keep pressing on. Some days I feel as though I would like to stay in bed and not get up to face another day. Yet I know I have Snookie and my family who needs me so much. We are a close family who each comfort the other.

It was foggy and rained all the way to Jackson yesterday when we took Amber and today it is snowing and only 35 out and the wind chill is 23. It will be so cold if we have to dig another grave beside Chili Bean. Our 4 children and our 6 grand children take part in the burials, even though I felt some were to young they begged to go.

I had to run away from my 7 year old grand baby to go cry in another room when she told me all she wanted for Christmas was Chili Beans's collar, her licence and her name tag. She said she would not ask for anything else if she could only have them. My son said that she could have them when I told him. She will get that and much more!
Ann

Ann, thank you so much for your words of kindness. You are in so much pain, and yet you are comforting me. What a special person you are.

I honestly don't think Falkor has many years left in him, but he COULD, if all goes well, have maybe one or two. I would consider myself truly blessed if this was to happen. He was expected to live til maybe five or six. We just had his eight birthday.

Anyways - I'm off to the vets.

Take care. I'm thinking of your two little sick ones.

Ann, any updates? I'm so hoping that she rallies....

Thanks so much for asking Steph,
Amber is still in the hospital the doctor said she has shown no improvement. He did change the meds that she is still getting through the IV'S. He said he had to treat it more aggressively, he may send her home Saturday. He did say that we should give her a little more time for the medicine to work. They will do a blood test next week and if it is the same or worse we have no choice but to put her to sleep.

Our daughters other cats Cinny, Midi and her toy poodle dog Gypsy Rose (a real delight to me) are missing Amber. Cinny isn't eating much or anything he meow's and stares into space. Her cat Midi has cancer and we don't bring him over to often as the car ride stresses him out to much it is hard enough on him when he goes for his shot every month.

When our daughter took them hone after she got off from work Cinny was even worse at his house so she brought them back. My husband and I are keeping Cinny and Gypsy Rose with us until Amber returns. But then she was always here with Cinny and Gypsy rose too so either way they miss Amber. I am so afraid the poor girl wont make it.
Ann

Here is a picture of my Snookie and Cinny asleep next to each other. Cinny is 5, Snookie is 10 Cinny has been playing with Snookie since he was born.

We are all so excited the vet just called and said that Amber ate something and that she was walking around in her cage. He said she begged him to pet her and flopped down to be petted. Doctor Tim said that she is one of the sweetest cats he has ever seen. He went on to say not to get to excited because she is still very sick and although that was a good sign things can still change for the worse. He said if all goes well he will let her come home Saturday.
Ann

I'm SO happy to hear that Ann!
My gosh, you have been through SO much lately. Your strength is an inspiration for me

Cheri

Oh that's WONDERFUL news Ann!!! Every little step counts..I'm soooooo glad to hear that Amber is eating a little bit. We're all hoping that she's on the mend.

Kristie

YEA! AMBER! She's getting better!

I've certainly been keeping her in my thoughts and prayers.
Keep us posted.
Kathleen

oh good news! she is doing alot better it sounds like she is on the road to recovery, what a cute pic of Snookie and the cat. I love that picture. Pamela

I am so delighted for you and wee Amber. I hope she comes back to you Saturday - I'll be thinking of you both x

The vet called me and said Amber was eating a little more today and she is drinking water now. They will take the iv's out tonight and start her on oral meds in the morning. My daughter and I are going to go pick Amber up tomorrow. She has not fully recovered but we are so happy we are bringing her home. Thanks everyone for all the prayers and kind words.
Ann

Dear Ann:

Ben and I were just headed out to dinner.........but, I just read your post about Sweet Amber, and I am SO VERY, VERY
EXCITED.......... I JUST HAD TO POST TO YOU FIRST!!!!!!!

THANK YOU, THANK YOU DEAREST GOD IN HEAVEN!!!!!!!!

As CheriAnn stated,

Definitely Ann, my friend......your strength is an inspiration!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!!

I absolutely LOVE THE PHOTO OF SWEET SNOOKIE AND CINNY!!!!!! So very, very precious!!!!!

You and your husband and family have been THROUGH SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH, and I am sorry.... So many
ups & downs............

But, right now..........."it's wonderful to hear of the "ups"..........." SO WONDERFUL!!!!!

To Sweet Amber.........."Please, keep getting better......our sweet baby..... We all love you very much!!!!


Many hugs for you {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ANN & FAMILY}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Love, Denise, Ben, Ms. Lucy and Mr. Yoster xo