My sweet 18 year old baby has CRF. I thought we had it under control with the sub q fluids and the special food, but I'm watching her go down each day. She is still moving about and drinking and using the bathroom, but she refuses to eat anything offered. Her weight has gone from 11 to 5 lbs and she vomits several times a day. I can't tell if she is in pain. I don't want her to suffer. I want to fix what's wrong but I don't know how. She has medication for appetite but will throw it up right after getting it. It's hard for me to seperate and judge her quality of life. I'm not ready to give up and let her go, but I never NEVER want her to suffer. How do I know? When is it time?

Hi, Sillybeans, please permit me to offer you my sincerest condolences on the Anticipatory Grief journey you and your precious companion are going through. From first hand experience several years ago with a beloved companion who also was challenged with Chronic Renal Failure, I can perfectly relate to what you are going through.

When the kidneys fail, they are no longer able to properly filter the toxins that build up in the blood stream and dispose of them through urination. The toxins build up in the blood stream and begin to affect the other vital organs in the body. While there are medications and procedures that can help relieve the symptoms of CRF, they cannot stop the continuing damage that is done to the body. One of the major symptoms of CRF - - and the progression of the disease - - is the inability to keep food and liquids on the stomach. When this inability becomes chronic, such as appears to be the case with your precious companion, it is usually an indication that the body is beginning to shut down. At this point, the physical body is uncomfortable.

At this point you need to contact your veterinary care provider and take your precious companion in for an evaluation as to what may be able to be done for her to keep her comfortable - - and to discuss the procedures to release her from her frail, failing, painful physical body.

Sillybeans, I know this is a very painful time for you seeing your precious companion decline and realizing - - inevitably - - the only thing you can do for her is making the most unselfish decision you can out of the deepest love you have for her - - even though your heart is breaking with the deepest sorrow you will know on this side of eternity. Please know we are here for you to try to offer you comfort, support, encouragement, and hope.

Thank you so much for honoring us in sharing your precious companion with us, Sillybeans. Please know you and your precious companion are in my thoughts and prayers, and please let us know how things are going.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

i couldn't have said it any better. it really does come down to quality of life, which encompasses factors such as eating/drinking/elimination/mobility/age/severity and type of illness. if one or a combination of these quality points are in question, then it is likely time to consult with a vet. it is very difficult to let go, but sometimes it is the kindest final act you could ever do for your furbaby.

I do have an appointment with her doctor tomorrow. I am hope to discuss with him her symptoms, new and old, and get his professional opinion.
I'm sorry that my post are so short and without a lot of detail. My mind and heart is already fogged with grief even as my baby sleeps next to me.
I can feel in my heart that her time with me is very limited. I'm am sure you all know how difficult it can be to seperate yourself from the situation and see it for what it is. I live for the good days and the small miracles that show me a glimpse of a better healthier cat.
I am so scared and broken.
What if I act too soon and lose precious time with my baby?
I'm sorry I have to stop for now....my tears won't stop.

Thank you so much for just talking to me. I am alone in this struggle and feel it deeply.

Hi, Sillybeans, thank you so much for sharing with us how you and your precious companion are doing. You ask a universal question that all of us struggle with: "What if I act too soon and lose precious time with my baby?" With your veterinary care provider's guidance you will be able to gauge your precious companion's quality of life so that you can make the best decisions possible for your precious companion - - including the decision of "when" it is time to release her from her frail, failing physical body.

Please know you and your precious companion are in my thoughts and prayers, Sillybeans, and please let us know how things go tomorrow.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Dear Sillybeans, I had to reply to you, for I directly feel your pain as well as your girl. Moon_Beam's words to you are genuine. If you have been giving the special kidney foods and IV's, and now she is anorexic, vomiting, etc., your Vet will probably confirm that she is now in the end-stage(Stage 4). Just let your Vet lead the way.

We have the results from my vet consultation. It's a mix of good and bad. I'll start with the weight. The last weight taken was the weight I gave on my original post. It was incorrect. The nurse subtracted the weight of her carrier, but she was weighed out of it. Her weight is 6.89 lbs.. Her heaviest has ever been 11 lbs.. While this is not good, we have figured out some possible causes. She is still suffering from a UTI that she had in December. It seems the course of antibiotics she was given should have been longer than 7 days. We are now on a 14 day course as well as receiving an antibiotic shot. Also, the perscription food she was on did not agree with her. Her food was changed to another brand which she seems to enjoy and keep down in small amounts. He added a little Zantac in for nausea and good measure. He said she looked alert and feisty.
The bad:
Her values were higher. He said we can try these things ( antibiotics, food, Zantac) and see where we are in a month, but that it is possible the vomiting will continue due to toxins.
He said he believes she has time left with us and that he believes she was feeling bad due to the UTI.
Of course I am happy, but I'm trying not to get my hopes up. I still feel that dread in my heart.
Thank you all so much for listening and understanding. All thoughts and opinions are welcome.

Hi, Sillybeans, thank you so much for sharing with us how your precious companion, and you, are doing. Please know your precious companion continues to be in my thoughts and prayers that she will find comfort and relief through the new course of antibiotics, nausea meds, and food. I know how your heart is aching knowing that the time remaining in your precious companion's earthly journey is now limited. The good days your heart soars and the bad days your heart is breaking. Please know we are here for you to share this time of Anticipatory Grief with you, which is a horror roller coaster ride all of its own.

I hope today is treating your precious companion, and you, kindly, Sillybeans, and that you both will have a very peaceful, blissful evening. Please let us know how your precious companion and you are doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

I also have a cat in Stage 4 renal failure, and I had to put one to sleep a bit over a year ago with the same problem. It's a common way for older cats to die. I have found Tanya's Feline Chronic Renal Failure Information Centre, felinecrf.org, to have a wealth of information, all free. It's a lot to digest, so to speak, but if you haven't looked at it already it should help you a lot.

I have a few comments that go beyond what is on that site, though. One has to do with phosphate management. I have found that although my cat is virtually impossible to get a pill into, aluminum hydroxide (AlOH) powder is basically tasteless. I can pull a capsule apart and mix the powder into her food, and she eats it without even noticing, even though she is very sensitive to most medications. You might want to try it, if you haven't already. The AlOH binds phosphate, which is a big contributor to kidney failure. My cat turned around and went uphill for about two months after starting this, although she seems to be sliding back again. Kidneys only get worse; never better.

The other thing is that I know someone whose father had kidney failure. He ended up getting a transplant before it killed him, but during the period when he wasn't able to get dialysis often enough and he was waiting for the kidney he said that it felt like he wanted to jump out of his skin -- he wasn't in pain exactly, but he was horribly uncomfortable. If your cat stops purring for you and is vomiting and lethargic, she may not be feeling pain, but she is suffering nonetheless, and it's time to put her needs first and end it. It is our last duty to them, painful as it is for us.

Enjoy these moments you have with your kitty -- take pictures and videos, spend plenty of time, make sure you appreciate every moment. No matter how long they live, they are always gone too soon.