Hello everyone,
I'm new here. I found this group through a search on Facebook. I have a chocolate labrador named Hershey that will turn 15 in early December. She has been my best friend for all the years. She helped me through a very painful divorce. She was there as I sat on the floor of my apartment with nothing to sit on. She encouraged me through the roughest times with her unconditional love. For the majority of those 15, it was just Hershey and me. She's my shadow everyday. It's hard to imagine life without her, but the day is coming.

Hershey has started to become more weak in her back legs and is falling more, having trouble getting up, and issues sitting down. She has lost the ability to bark and is incontinent with her bowels. Other than these issues and being nearly deaf, she's still happy and bright-eyed when she is up and walking. The last few days, I've noticed more deterioration and a heavier sleeping pattern. Therefore, Hershey is scheduled to go to the vet tomorrow, Monday. This is a scheduled check-up but I don't know if Hershey will come home or not. I will be having the "quality of life" talk with the vet. I need to know if or how much pain Hershey is in. I need to know what will happen if I allow her issues to progress. My greatest gift to Hershey is to not let her go on for me and be in pain. I am so scared for tomorrow's appointment.

I am so devastated. I've been crying so much. This is the most difficult decision I have ever made in my life. I know the vet (I love) will help me with this decision. I'm just a mess and I don't know how I'm going to be able to even talk when I get there tomorrow. This is so hard and I can't even put into words the pain I am experiencing. I know I will be okay someday but right now, it is truly terrible. I have a toddler at home and I want her to see me grieve as I should but I can't remain in a "down" state around her.

I don't know what else to say other than like everyone here, I'm just having troubles dealing with this. I hold on to my faith in that I know I will see Hershey again someday. It's just so hard to let her go. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers for this vet visit tomorrow night. It's going to be very hard - I don't know what to expect as I need the vet to help with the final decision and what is best for Hershey.

Thank you all. Many blessings to you and a peaceful rest tonight.

Jenny

I read your post with a heavy heart. I pray you have guidance from within and Above when you go to the vet today.

Hi, jenebekka, thank you so much for sharing your precious Hershey with us. Please permit me to reassure you that what you are feeling is very normal - - it is called Anticipatory Grief. It is a journey which recognizes that your and your precious Hershey's journey is approaching a time when it will transform into a new dimension from the physical realm. It is a very difficult journey because your precious Hershey is still physically with you responding to you, as you are still physically able to touch, see, and hear her, and enjoy the scent of her fur when you kiss her and hold her close to you. Although you see her physical body succumbing to the frailities that all physical life eventually experiences, there still lingers a hope in your heart that "something" can be done with the assistance of your veterinary care provider to give your precious Hershey "more time" with you - - and this is also perfectly natural and normal.

My beloved Oslo, who is a Black Lab, joined the angels at 15 years of age due to a sudden stroke. However, for the previous 4 or 5 years his physical body began a slow and steady decline. First with the diagnosis of hypothyroidism which was eventually controlled with a thyroid supplement, coupled with a diagnosis of Laryngeal Paralysis which affected his ability to breathe properly especially when the weather was very hot and after exertion. Although there is a surgery for this condition, it is highly invasive, it would have left him prone to infections, and the benefits would eventually fail leaving him worse off. So needless to say the surgery was not done. LP is also accompanied by a degenerative neurologic dysfunction similar to Lou Gehrig's which caused my beloved Oslo to become incontinent and have difficulty standing and balancing on his legs. All of these medical challenges combined were "manageable" with medications which kept my beloved Oslo "active" within his family through the years. But it was a sudden stroke 2 weeks after his 15th birthday that led me to the decision of releasing him from his frail, failing physical body so that his sweet Living Spirit could be free.

The only reason why I share my experience with you is to let you know that you WILL know when the time is appropriate for you to make the decision on your precious Hershey's behalf. It still will not be an easy decision to make, and the sorrow will still be like a searing pain in your heart for awhile - - but I promise you that whatever decisions you make for your precious Hershey will be the RIGHT ONES for her.

There are many books that are available that can help both you and your daughter find comfort during your grief adjustment journeys. And please know we are here for you, jenebekka, for as long and as often as you need us.

Thank you again so much for sharing your precious Hershey with us. Please know you and your precious companion are in my thoughts and prayers today that your veterinary care provider will be able to offer you hope, comfort, and encouragement for your precious Hershey. Please let us know how things go.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

I visit here often as I'm processing my own grief cycles. Thinking of you and Hershey. Sending you love and light.

Jenebekka,

Your story brought tears to my eyes as I was reading this. I'm also new to this site and it's just so heartbreaking reading so much on how people are suffering for the loss of their babies. I'm so terribly sorry to hear your baby Hershey is in so much pain, I'm not sure how your baby is doing by now since I just saw that its been a few weeks since you have post this. I really hope that their was something that you could of done by now in order to save your Hershey's life its just so heartbroken to even hear this is happening. It breaks my heart to hear some of these babies are so ill and are hurting bad I know it might be hard for you an I can't even imagine how you must be feeling now. you will definitely be in my thoughts and prayers and please if you ever read this please keep us posted and let us know what is happening with your Hershey. Take care and hope to hear from you soon.

I think of you often and hope you and Hershey are doing OK.