I lost my very best friend he came into my life 16 1/2 years ago, batter and abused I thought I was rescuing him, instead we rescued each other. He picked me and did all he could to make sure I was the one. His name was Treasured Dash he was my horse, my friend. September 19 2013 I had to make the decision to let him be free from severe pain, there was nothing left I could do. That day haunts me even though I know I did the right thing. I also know I did the right thing because if he was not ready, there was no way he would let it happen. So many people who knew the bond and love I had for him found out he was gone, and could care less, not one word was said. I have yet to talk about it until now and the guilt is overwhelming.
I miss him so deeply I can not even look at pictures of him, not even of other horses right now. The sound of a horse even on the TV breaks my heart. I hope in time my heart will heal, I just don't know how.
I know I am not the only one who has lost a dear friend and my heart goes out to all of you.

Hi, dml, please permit me to offer you my sincerest sympathies in the physical loss of your beloved Treasured Dash. Losing a companion is never easy regardless of the circumstances or how long we are blessed with the privilege of their company. Euthanasia is the last gift of love we can give to our companions at great sacrifice to ourselves so that they can be restored to their former youthfulness in the company of the angels.

DML, this grief journey is one of the most painful experiences you will know on this side of eternity. It is a journey that is filled with many different emotions that can overwhelm us all at one time - - it is a journey that is frequently referred to as a horror roller coaster ride. One of the many emotions ALL of us experience is guilt / remorse, and it is one of the more difficult emotions to reconcile. I hope in time your heart will find a peace in knowing that you did everything in your power to give your beloved Treasured Dash a happy and healthy earthly journey, and that when his physical body could not endure pain your love for his well being came first - - which required your most unselfish act of love in easing his transition journey from his physical body. There is no greater love than this, dml.

This grief adjustment journey is one that cannot be reconciled in an hour, a day, a week, a month, or even 6 months - - for you are now on a journey that is filled with all the "first withouts" and the memories that can be too painful right now that include "this time yesterday, last week, last month, last year" to endure. It is a journey that can only be traveled one day at a time, sometimes one moment at a time, in your own way and in your own time.

Although clinical professionals recognize that the grief journey for the physical loss of a beloved companion is the same as it for the physical loss of a human family member or friend, unfortunately our society in general, and sadly sometimes the people who are the closest to us emotionally and geographically, do not. This is one of the many reasons why this wonderful forum is here - - so that each of us can have a safe place to come to share our deepest sorrow among friends who truly do know what we are going through.

Please let me try to reassure you that what you are going through is very normal deep grief - - very painful both emotionally and physically, yes - - still very normal. Your heart is shattered with the deepest sorrow, and right now nothing makes sense - - nothing else matters. Although daily routines continue - - jobs get done, bills get paid, groceries are bought, meals are fixed, etc. - - each task is a constant reminder that your beloved Treasured Dash is no longer physically with you - - and it hurts.

But I promise you it will not always be this way, dml. One day when you least expect it you will be thinking of your Treasured Dash you will find yourself smiling - - truly smiling - - and your heart will fill with the warmth of the many treasured memories you and your beloved Treasured Dash share. But until this day comes for you, dml, please know you are among friends here who truly do understand what you are going through, and we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us.

There is one thing that will NEVER change - - and that is the love bond you and your beloved Treasured Dash share. Love is eternal - - it is not restricted to the physical laws of time and space. Your beloved Treasured Dash's sweet Living Spirit continues to share your earthly journey as he always has and always will - - for he is always and forever a part of your heart and memories, dml - - he is always and forever a heartbeat close to you.

I know all too well from first hand experience that when our hearts are in deep grief there really are no adequate words in any language that can soothe the seering pain of sorrow. Still I hope the words I share with you will be able to offer you some measure of comfort, support, encouragement, and hope as you travel your grief adjustment journey.

Thank you so very much for honoring us in sharing your beloved Treasured Dash with us, dml. Perhaps sometime you will feel up to sharing pictures of him with us - - but only when / if you want to. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, dml, and please let us know how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Thank you so very much. The bond we had was like no other I have ever had. I lost my other best buddy my rottie 2 years ago from cancer and that was also so very painful. For some reason this time it has hit me so very hard because we had a connection and bond that is not of this world. I guess I wanted to be able to feel him or know he is here, and I get nothing. So I guess that because he is running in those green pastures living free from pain.
Thank you again Its even harder when you have no one to talk to about it.
Hugs

Hi, dml, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. I do so understand from first hand experience how you are feeling when you share with us: "Its even harder when you have no one to talk to about it." This is one of the many reasons why this wonderful forum is here - - for it is a safe place where each of us can come to share what is in our hearts with those who truly do understand. By ourselves we would be crushed by the weight of our deepest sorrow. Together we can find the strength and courage to endure through the seering pain of grief.

Sometimes when our hearts are in deep sorrow we are not able to "feel" the Presence of our beloved companion's sweet Living Spirit with us. But even so - - this does not diminish the reality that they are always and forever in our hearts and memories - - they are always and forever a heartbeat close to us. And by sharing their earthly journey with others we - as their living legacy - - keep the warmth of the "eternal flame" of their Living Spirit forever burning bright.

I hope today is treating you kindly, dml, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Treasured Dash's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, dml, and please let us know how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Dear dml,
I keep starting to reply to you and find I have nothing of real content to add.
I just want to reach out and say you and Treasured Dash were something wonderful, and I'm sorry you don't have a nearby human to be with you in your grief.
Katherine