Full Version: Unprepared
Hi, I'm knew here and thank-you all for sharing your stories. My baby was ill, unbeknownst to me. Sun Oct 24th I noticed Bronte did not look herself. After visiting the vet, she was found to have an abdomen full of fluid. She had lost 7 lbs from her normal weight, however, it was hard to see from the fluid swelling her body. She never kept a normal eating routine and liked to eat from my roomate's cat's bowl, so I never knew that she had stopped eating. They found some sort of growth, I learned after was a cyst, growing on her liver. Multiple tests were run thet led her to her surgery on Sat Oct 30th. I missed all the signs. Bronte seemed herself until that first vet visit. After enduring multiple needles to drain fluid from her abdomen, and me force feeding her, she slowly deteriorated. She could barely walk, would not purr, and her vocalisation had changed. By Sat. I was convinced that surgery would save her. They held her surgery on Friday because she was too weak. Then Saturday morning rushed her procedure because she was rapidly declining now. She was dehydrated, could not maintain her blood pressure, or her temperature. She was 10-12 degrees cooler than she should have been. Afterwards she went into cardiac arrest twice, before I was able to make it to her side. I was told that mentally she was not recovering as she should have. Something else was going on other than a cyst. Her brain was affected. 6 days after I first noticed something was wrong, I had to have her put to sleep. I didn't even get to hold her for a few minutes before she began to have respiratory failure again, and the euthanasia shots had to be rushed. I held her and cried afterwards, unable to believe she was gone and feeling guilt that I couldn't do more. Also I felt immense guilt that I selfishly let her suffer as long as I did, not knowing that something was wrong, and letting her undergo surgery then life saving attempts of CPR. I'm still in denial. I expect her to come running out from under my bed (her favorite hiding place). I can't sleep with the bedroom closed, because she always needed it open to come and go as she pleased. And I keep her shampoo bottle in my room so I can remember how she smelled. Little Bronte was 12 years old. She outlasted most of my jobs, 99% of my boyfriends, and 5 residences. I can't even fathom having another cat after her loss. Now to make matters worse, a tech at the vet's office reportedly got bit so they have to send her remains to the county vet to test her brain tissue for rabies. I'll have to wait 3 additional weeks before she will be returned home to me. People look at me strangely for being so devastated by her death. But as far as I'm concerned she was my child. Does this pain get better? Thanks for listening. I'll try to get a picture of her posted soon.
Hi Bronte's Mom,
Welcome! I am SO, SO sorry about your precious Bronte's sudden death. I feel SO connected to you!!! I came to this forum on October 3rd with almost the same story as you. In fact, my post was titled "Does It Ever Get Better?"
I had a "daughter" and "best friend" that was close to turning 12 years old, that I had to "put to rest" suddenly. Rachael (a black labrador) seemed very healthy to us. She had started developing arthritis and did move slower when she got up and down. Her appetite had slowed down, but we had just started her on arthritis medication and blamed that for her decrease in appetite.
Then, one Tuesday night, when we got home from work, she wouldn't eat at all. She didn't eat her breakfast and wouldn't eat her dinner. She seemed to be moving even slower than "usual". We took her to the vet. We were horrified to discover after blood tests, that her cell count was extremely low and indicated internal bleeding. We tried medications, hoping it was an ulcer, but feared it was cancer. By Thursday, when she only got worse, we knew our worst fear had come true, and it was from cancer. By Saturday morning she couldn't stand up, wouldn't eat or drink and her breathing was louder, like she was struggling. I had to take her the vet that morning, on October 2nd. We only had 4 days to realize she was very sick, watch her go downhill SUPER fast, and let her go.
Just like you, I struggled with extreme guilt! I kept blaming myself for not discovering earlier how sick she was. I kept telling myself that I could have saved her life if I had known earlier. She was SO strong for us, that she never showed how sick she really was, until she became so weak she couldn't hide it.
What you are feeling is normal, though. I totally understand the shock and disbelief you are feeling now. Please forgive yourself, though! You didn't do anything wrong. Your precious Bronte was like my Rachael, they stayed strong and devoted for us, right up until the end. You certainly couldn't have known just how sick she had gotten, until she could no longer hide it. As soon as you realized she was sick, you took her right to the vet. Just like us, you did the VERY best for her that you could. There is NO way to ever get any answers to the questions we have about saving them if only..... So, for your peace of mind, you have to accept that Bronte got sick and you and the vet did the very best you could.
Your Bronte is no longer suffering now. She knows how much you love her and that you took the very best care of her. You gave her a WONDERFUL 12 years! Take comfort that she never had to know the pain of starving or sleeping in the streets because of your love.
Finally, to answer your question about getting better, yes it will.
I know everyone in here told me it would get better too and I just didn't know it ever could. But it's been 4 weeks and 5 days, and I can get through the days without crying as much. Oh, I still hurt and I still cry, but the healing is starting now.
I know these wonderful and special friends in here will give you much better advice than I can, but I just wanted to let you know that there is someone else here that felt the same way you do now, and I AM getting better, just like you will. Time frames vary for each person, but I promise you it will get better with time. I believe that the sooner we forgive ourselves and stop asking the "What if..." questions, the real healing will start. The pain and loss is already SO hard to deal with. We don't need to beat ourselves up with guilt on top of all that too.
Big hugs for you!
Cheri
Welcome! I am SO, SO sorry about your precious Bronte's sudden death. I feel SO connected to you!!! I came to this forum on October 3rd with almost the same story as you. In fact, my post was titled "Does It Ever Get Better?"
I had a "daughter" and "best friend" that was close to turning 12 years old, that I had to "put to rest" suddenly. Rachael (a black labrador) seemed very healthy to us. She had started developing arthritis and did move slower when she got up and down. Her appetite had slowed down, but we had just started her on arthritis medication and blamed that for her decrease in appetite.
Then, one Tuesday night, when we got home from work, she wouldn't eat at all. She didn't eat her breakfast and wouldn't eat her dinner. She seemed to be moving even slower than "usual". We took her to the vet. We were horrified to discover after blood tests, that her cell count was extremely low and indicated internal bleeding. We tried medications, hoping it was an ulcer, but feared it was cancer. By Thursday, when she only got worse, we knew our worst fear had come true, and it was from cancer. By Saturday morning she couldn't stand up, wouldn't eat or drink and her breathing was louder, like she was struggling. I had to take her the vet that morning, on October 2nd. We only had 4 days to realize she was very sick, watch her go downhill SUPER fast, and let her go.
Just like you, I struggled with extreme guilt! I kept blaming myself for not discovering earlier how sick she was. I kept telling myself that I could have saved her life if I had known earlier. She was SO strong for us, that she never showed how sick she really was, until she became so weak she couldn't hide it.
What you are feeling is normal, though. I totally understand the shock and disbelief you are feeling now. Please forgive yourself, though! You didn't do anything wrong. Your precious Bronte was like my Rachael, they stayed strong and devoted for us, right up until the end. You certainly couldn't have known just how sick she had gotten, until she could no longer hide it. As soon as you realized she was sick, you took her right to the vet. Just like us, you did the VERY best for her that you could. There is NO way to ever get any answers to the questions we have about saving them if only..... So, for your peace of mind, you have to accept that Bronte got sick and you and the vet did the very best you could.
Your Bronte is no longer suffering now. She knows how much you love her and that you took the very best care of her. You gave her a WONDERFUL 12 years! Take comfort that she never had to know the pain of starving or sleeping in the streets because of your love.
Finally, to answer your question about getting better, yes it will.
I know everyone in here told me it would get better too and I just didn't know it ever could. But it's been 4 weeks and 5 days, and I can get through the days without crying as much. Oh, I still hurt and I still cry, but the healing is starting now. I know these wonderful and special friends in here will give you much better advice than I can, but I just wanted to let you know that there is someone else here that felt the same way you do now, and I AM getting better, just like you will. Time frames vary for each person, but I promise you it will get better with time. I believe that the sooner we forgive ourselves and stop asking the "What if..." questions, the real healing will start. The pain and loss is already SO hard to deal with. We don't need to beat ourselves up with guilt on top of all that too.
Big hugs for you!
Cheri
Hey Bronte's Mom,
I am so sorry about Bronte. You got some excellent advice from Cheri here, for sure. The "little ones" are so good at hiding their pain -- it's instinct, so oftentimes it is very difficult to know they are in pain until they are really, really sick. You did everything in the world that anyone could possibly have done for your Bronte. I hope you will soon come to believe and know that in your heart.
I know what you mean about her outlasting most everything else in your life -- like someone else here said, people come and go, we move, etc., but our babies are always there with us. Night and day, all the time. I don't know why more people can't understand that we have lost our best friend and that it does hurt more even than losing a person because they ARE there with us most of the time, they are always DEPENDABLE, they do always LOVE us, they are totally dependent on us for everything and when we aren't able to make them better and/or save them, it is totally devastating.
It does get better, but it takes awhile. It's been more than six months since I let my little Hannah girl go, and some days I still miss her more than anything in the world. Some days, my heart still hurts so much and I long to see my girl. Then, it gets better again. I guess this will go on for a long time. I did tell one of my friends last night that I was really down again and missing her so, and she said, well, she was with you a LONG time. She understood, but most people don't. That does make it tough because like lots of others here, I feel I have to conceal my feelings. Most people I know think there's something wrong with a person who keeps grieving over this loss. But then again, most people just aren't "comfortable" with grief, even when it's over a person.
Keep coming here and posting your feelings. People here do understand and care. Take good care of yourself. We all know the screaming, searing pain you are feeling.
Love,
Marcia
I am so sorry about Bronte. You got some excellent advice from Cheri here, for sure. The "little ones" are so good at hiding their pain -- it's instinct, so oftentimes it is very difficult to know they are in pain until they are really, really sick. You did everything in the world that anyone could possibly have done for your Bronte. I hope you will soon come to believe and know that in your heart.
I know what you mean about her outlasting most everything else in your life -- like someone else here said, people come and go, we move, etc., but our babies are always there with us. Night and day, all the time. I don't know why more people can't understand that we have lost our best friend and that it does hurt more even than losing a person because they ARE there with us most of the time, they are always DEPENDABLE, they do always LOVE us, they are totally dependent on us for everything and when we aren't able to make them better and/or save them, it is totally devastating.
It does get better, but it takes awhile. It's been more than six months since I let my little Hannah girl go, and some days I still miss her more than anything in the world. Some days, my heart still hurts so much and I long to see my girl. Then, it gets better again. I guess this will go on for a long time. I did tell one of my friends last night that I was really down again and missing her so, and she said, well, she was with you a LONG time. She understood, but most people don't. That does make it tough because like lots of others here, I feel I have to conceal my feelings. Most people I know think there's something wrong with a person who keeps grieving over this loss. But then again, most people just aren't "comfortable" with grief, even when it's over a person.
Keep coming here and posting your feelings. People here do understand and care. Take good care of yourself. We all know the screaming, searing pain you are feeling.
Love,
Marcia
I am so sorry to hear about your Bronte. Her story reminds me of my little one whom I lost two weeks ago. My kitty, Akasha, left me due to illness at 15 years. I had, and still have, so many feelings of guilt for not knowing that there was something wrong with her also. I thought she was peeing all over the house because she wasn't too keen on our new baby boy comming home but it turned out that her kidneys were failing. I found out that she was sick one night by comming home to my poor friend lying on the floor covered in her own mess and surrounded by blood. If I had just paid more attention I feel like I may have caught it sooner but Akasha was the queen of this castle and it seemed logical that she would protest the arrival of a new baby who was taking up so much of mommies time. She really didn't let on that she wasn't feeling well until the night I took her to the vet and found out that it was too late. Our vet was wonderful, however, and did a full physical on her before we made the hardest decision we've ever had to make. He was kind enough to let us know that she probably wasn't in much pain but I know my cat...even if she was she would never let on. We had no other option given to us considering her age and other medical problems..but I still feel terrible.
I am so sorry for your loss....I know how hard it is. Keep right on loving her and remember all of the good times. She's still with you and always will be. One of the other members wrote something to me that made me feel better. She told me that Akasha wouldn't want me to be sad.....and it's true. She was always there to comfort me when I was unhappy. She went with me through moves, boyfriends, a husband (now ex), and a baby...just like Bronte went with you. It's ok to miss her and it's ok to be sad but remember that all she wanted was for you to be happy.
Take care,
Kristie
I am so sorry for your loss....I know how hard it is. Keep right on loving her and remember all of the good times. She's still with you and always will be. One of the other members wrote something to me that made me feel better. She told me that Akasha wouldn't want me to be sad.....and it's true. She was always there to comfort me when I was unhappy. She went with me through moves, boyfriends, a husband (now ex), and a baby...just like Bronte went with you. It's ok to miss her and it's ok to be sad but remember that all she wanted was for you to be happy.
Take care,
Kristie
Hi Bronte's Mom!
I am so sorry to hear of your precious loss. I myself just three days ago lost my baby of 15 years. We took her in as a stray and promised to forever take care of her. But like yourself didn't see symptoms until it was too late, listened to drs instead of my heart, and my baby passed early Mon morning 11/1 one hour after an argument with the dr who disregarded my request of adding nutrients to try to stablize before having to go for a transfusion. She argued that she didn't want any interference with the transfusion but when I asked for rational explanation she declined and said "I am not going to go there with you on that" - how rude!
I am struggling so hard with the fact that I did my research a few hours too late and that I listened to someone who didn't know my kitty...they wouldn't even let me be there while the transfusion occurred even to hold her, eventhough they touted ""preserving, protecting and celebrating the human-animal bond" (right on their business cards).
Her systems blood tested fine, but the 1st dr said she's fighting an infection, then the 24care 1st dr said probably some peritonitis is going on.....I've since found out there should not have been a transfusion with any sign of peritonitis.... but their only way they said to help the anemia was to transfuse.. they gave diphenhydramine without my knowlege but first and formost I was stupid to not ask about the risks involved and they neglected to advise me before anyway....I NOW KNOW TO ASK WHAT IS IN MY HEART AND DEMAND IT!
We are really the only ones that know our animals and we should be allowed to be a part of their healing...drs of practice that disregard our requests should not be able to practice... so my gift from my baby is to fight the fight for her and others in dire situations... give appropriately researched advice and to follow my heart!
I too struggle with what happened at the end...I know I will heal. I have four children, three other cats and three dogs and my husband. I have to heal for them!
But it is hard - she was my baby too....
You will heal. Do not force the healing, it will come on its own. Turn this into a teaching example to teach others about what not to do or what to do. I am finding that advising helps me. If I can help one kitty or one doggy live another day, I am happy!
It is really weird, but I have always had a super strong and crazy love for animals and children, and I always thought my life was destined to do good work for them. Maybe just maybe this is why!
Here was a prayer I read to my children and to myself last night for our burial of our baby - Stinker Bear - I hope it helps you too...
I AM NOT THERE
Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there, I did not die.
-author-unknown
My husband and I finished the burial late last night... when we finished a really strong wind blew thru for a few minutes while I walked from her gravesite to my front door (much stronger than when I walked outside minutes earlier)... I felt it was she speaking to me to be strong. For her I willl, for my family I have to.
Stinker Bear is with my doggie Bear-Bear who passed last year. I slowly healed from his passing....you will too.
Now Stinker and Bear-Bear are together as they were in life. Those two were so cool with each other.... He was really the first dog she liked and would tolerate his sniffing on her... oh yeah, that reminds me... this week my other dogs seemed to know what was going on....and even though she never tolerated these other dogs weeks before...Shia Bear sniffed all over her and licked her and she didn't mind...
Writing seems to help me heal too, maybe the more you write will help heal you too. You were a fine Mom and
God Bless!
Pamela
I am so sorry to hear of your precious loss. I myself just three days ago lost my baby of 15 years. We took her in as a stray and promised to forever take care of her. But like yourself didn't see symptoms until it was too late, listened to drs instead of my heart, and my baby passed early Mon morning 11/1 one hour after an argument with the dr who disregarded my request of adding nutrients to try to stablize before having to go for a transfusion. She argued that she didn't want any interference with the transfusion but when I asked for rational explanation she declined and said "I am not going to go there with you on that" - how rude!
I am struggling so hard with the fact that I did my research a few hours too late and that I listened to someone who didn't know my kitty...they wouldn't even let me be there while the transfusion occurred even to hold her, eventhough they touted ""preserving, protecting and celebrating the human-animal bond" (right on their business cards).
Her systems blood tested fine, but the 1st dr said she's fighting an infection, then the 24care 1st dr said probably some peritonitis is going on.....I've since found out there should not have been a transfusion with any sign of peritonitis.... but their only way they said to help the anemia was to transfuse.. they gave diphenhydramine without my knowlege but first and formost I was stupid to not ask about the risks involved and they neglected to advise me before anyway....I NOW KNOW TO ASK WHAT IS IN MY HEART AND DEMAND IT!
We are really the only ones that know our animals and we should be allowed to be a part of their healing...drs of practice that disregard our requests should not be able to practice... so my gift from my baby is to fight the fight for her and others in dire situations... give appropriately researched advice and to follow my heart!
I too struggle with what happened at the end...I know I will heal. I have four children, three other cats and three dogs and my husband. I have to heal for them!
But it is hard - she was my baby too....
You will heal. Do not force the healing, it will come on its own. Turn this into a teaching example to teach others about what not to do or what to do. I am finding that advising helps me. If I can help one kitty or one doggy live another day, I am happy!
It is really weird, but I have always had a super strong and crazy love for animals and children, and I always thought my life was destined to do good work for them. Maybe just maybe this is why!
Here was a prayer I read to my children and to myself last night for our burial of our baby - Stinker Bear - I hope it helps you too...
I AM NOT THERE
Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there, I did not die.
-author-unknown
My husband and I finished the burial late last night... when we finished a really strong wind blew thru for a few minutes while I walked from her gravesite to my front door (much stronger than when I walked outside minutes earlier)... I felt it was she speaking to me to be strong. For her I willl, for my family I have to.
Stinker Bear is with my doggie Bear-Bear who passed last year. I slowly healed from his passing....you will too.
Now Stinker and Bear-Bear are together as they were in life. Those two were so cool with each other.... He was really the first dog she liked and would tolerate his sniffing on her... oh yeah, that reminds me... this week my other dogs seemed to know what was going on....and even though she never tolerated these other dogs weeks before...Shia Bear sniffed all over her and licked her and she didn't mind...
Writing seems to help me heal too, maybe the more you write will help heal you too. You were a fine Mom and
God Bless!
Pamela
It is so true -- with animals and humans both -- we cannot rely on the doctors and/or the vets 100% of the time. It is so unfortunate, because during times like these we are so stressed, so worried, so afraid, that we can't really think "straight." I too want to be around to help others BEFORE they have to go through the nightmare of not having been informed. It's too bad that most people come here only after when it's too late. I waited two weeks to look up about Hannah's "conditions," and I went on the net with a terrible fear in my heart. There were things that could have done, but I was too late. The vets never, ever told me her heart murmur was treatable. I hated myself so for not knowing and/or finding so many things out before I let my baby go. I still feel really devastated about all of it, if I let myself. I try not to though. It does no good, serves no good purpose and won't bring Hannah back. I too hope to be able to help others whenever I can, to spare them at least some of the pain. And it is true -- we all know our babies would not want us to be so unhappy and they would not want us to blame ourselves, I'm sure. It's just all so hard.
Here's a little something that might help:
Please Don't Feel Guilty
[I]Please don't feel guilty. You don't need to. I don't want you to be rough on yourself. I heard you speak last night. I heard you say how guilty you are for what you think you didn't do right. You did more than I ever would have expected anyone to. You loved me through it all. I never doubted your love for me. Whatever decisions you made, I know were made with my best interest in mind. Please don't feel guilty. It breaks my heart to hear you speak of your guilt. You don't need to feel guilty. Please don't.[/I]--Betty J. Carmack
From Grieving the Death of a Pet
Marcia
Here's a little something that might help:
Please Don't Feel Guilty
[I]Please don't feel guilty. You don't need to. I don't want you to be rough on yourself. I heard you speak last night. I heard you say how guilty you are for what you think you didn't do right. You did more than I ever would have expected anyone to. You loved me through it all. I never doubted your love for me. Whatever decisions you made, I know were made with my best interest in mind. Please don't feel guilty. It breaks my heart to hear you speak of your guilt. You don't need to feel guilty. Please don't.[/I]--Betty J. Carmack
From Grieving the Death of a Pet
Marcia
Hi Bronte's Mom,
I am glad you are here, among "family" (that is how I feel about all of us here). I'm SO sorry about Bronte's passing. She is all spirit now, and experiencing joy that we can only glimpse while living in these physical bodies of ours. Love is stronger than the death of the physical body. You and Bronte will ALWAYS be connected. 
The others said some wonderful, comforting things, and they are right. You are such a terrific Mom.
In 1998, I lost my 3 1/2-year-old kitty, Mariah, to pancreatitis. I didn't get her to the vet's soon enough, etc. etc. (I made so many mistakes; it was all such a nightmare), yet Mariah found ways of letting me know that it was okay, that I was forgiven, that she loved me, that there was a reason that it was her time... One month after her death, I even got to see the "reason"... It's a long story which I eventually want and need to share with all of you, but suffice it to say that I did find peace.
Write any time. Sending you prayers of comfort and peace,
Kathy
I am glad you are here, among "family" (that is how I feel about all of us here). I'm SO sorry about Bronte's passing. She is all spirit now, and experiencing joy that we can only glimpse while living in these physical bodies of ours. Love is stronger than the death of the physical body. You and Bronte will ALWAYS be connected.
The others said some wonderful, comforting things, and they are right. You are such a terrific Mom.
In 1998, I lost my 3 1/2-year-old kitty, Mariah, to pancreatitis. I didn't get her to the vet's soon enough, etc. etc. (I made so many mistakes; it was all such a nightmare), yet Mariah found ways of letting me know that it was okay, that I was forgiven, that she loved me, that there was a reason that it was her time... One month after her death, I even got to see the "reason"... It's a long story which I eventually want and need to share with all of you, but suffice it to say that I did find peace.
Write any time. Sending you prayers of comfort and peace,
Kathy
Hi I am new here too I am so sorry that you lost Bronte. I am sorry that you have to wait so long to have your little girl returned to you. I look forward to seeing a picture of your baby.
I have met some wonderful people here that have already given me so much comfort and my precious little Schnauzer has not left me yet. Back in Feb. all the vets I took her to said they did not believe she would live past August but she is still with me.
I ran from vet to vet hoping to find one that would say they could fix her, but they could not, and I still feel guilty about not doing more but one of the members e-mailed me and I will be looking into her sugestion.
Ann
I have met some wonderful people here that have already given me so much comfort and my precious little Schnauzer has not left me yet. Back in Feb. all the vets I took her to said they did not believe she would live past August but she is still with me.
I ran from vet to vet hoping to find one that would say they could fix her, but they could not, and I still feel guilty about not doing more but one of the members e-mailed me and I will be looking into her sugestion.
Ann
Hi Bronte's mom.
Like you, I lost my beloved furbaby to a sudden illness and death. It was utterly devastating. My recently turned-nine-year-old border collie collapsed June 3rd, and was dead at the vet's on the morning of the 5th. She was suffering from a previously undetected heart condition, and all her organs shut down due to lack of blood supply.
I'm so sorry that you are now going through this kind of heartbreaking situation. It is unbearable, I know it full well.
The truth is that it does get better. I just passed my Luba's five month "death anniversary". I still get very sad, but life does continue, and you even find some joy again.
Take care of yourself - Steph
Like you, I lost my beloved furbaby to a sudden illness and death. It was utterly devastating. My recently turned-nine-year-old border collie collapsed June 3rd, and was dead at the vet's on the morning of the 5th. She was suffering from a previously undetected heart condition, and all her organs shut down due to lack of blood supply.
I'm so sorry that you are now going through this kind of heartbreaking situation. It is unbearable, I know it full well.
The truth is that it does get better. I just passed my Luba's five month "death anniversary". I still get very sad, but life does continue, and you even find some joy again.
Take care of yourself - Steph
Hey everybody, thank-you so much for the support. I haven't cried in days and your poetry and well wishes helped me release some tension. I fight the guilt everyday thinking of myself as a neglectful Mom who was too busy to notice the obvious. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who can be fooled by are children's brave face. I enjoyed seeing then pictures of your babies, I'll get Bronte's up soon. My parent's offered me 2 new kittens needing homes, however, I'm still in mourning and feel like I'm disrespecting Bronte if I even pet another animal. I still think she's coming home, and am pretty sure the shock will set in when I receive her little box with her name on it. Thank-you again. And my thoughts are with you are yours.
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