Hi all, my name is Rhi, and I live in Wales. I just lost my cat a couple of weeks ago. His name was Micky, we found him just over a year ago as a dirty filthy stray and even though I really hated cats at the time I took him in because my girlfriend (now my wife) couldn't have pets at her place. And we cleaned him up and sorted him out, and had his rotted teeth removed and got rid of his fleas and fattened him up and now he's gone. It was quite sudden. He was ill Friday and died Tuesday.

We only had him a year but he had really gotten into every part of our lives, and I really, really loved him.

Now I really, really miss him.

I've managed to stop crying last week, but I've started seeing glimpses of him out of the corner of my eye instead. The stress of it all means I'm not sleeping and I suffer from depression and anxiety anyway.

I want my cat back.

I don't know if I should get another cat, or a kitten, or wait until I find one again (you never know) or to just carry on with my hamsters (I have three), I don't know....

What do you do after you lose a pet? It wasn't this bad when I was a kid I swear, and we had a whole load of dogs, including my own dog, why now, as an adult, does it suck so much?

I don't know. Micky was awesome, he was a pain in the bum, but he was my pain in the bum.

I would post a picture, but I don't know if that's ok.

Hi, Rhi, please permit me to offer you my sincerest sympathies in the physical loss of your beloved Micky. Losing a companion is never easy regardless of the circumstances or how long we are blessed with the privilege of their company.

Rhi, this grief journey is one of the hardest experiences you will know, for it is filled with many different emotions that can usually overwhelm us all at one time - - it is frequently referred to as a horror roller coaster ride. Please let me try to offer you reassurance that what you are feeling is very normal deep grief. Also, please let me try to reassure you that the times you "see" and / or "feel" your beloved Micky are very real - - for these experiences are your beloved Micky's way of trying to let you know that his sweet Living Spirit is with you. I assure you that you are not losing your mind.

We live in a physically oriented world governed by the five senses of sight, sound, taste, touch, and smell. But there is another dimension to our lives that is not governed by the physical realm - - and it is the dimension of eternal love. Even though your beloved Micky is no longer physically with you, Rhi, he continues to share your earthly journey as he always has and always will - - for his sweet Living Spirit is always and forever a part of your heart and your memories, Rhi - - he is always and forever a heartbeat close to you.

You ask the universal question that each of us ask when we are faced with enduring a grief adjustment journey: "What do you do after you lose a pet?" The answer is as individual as the unique love bond we share with each of our individual companions. When we are in deep grief, it is very hard to know "what to do" - - and therefore unless we are faced with having to make immediate life changing decisions sometimes it is best to wait until our deep sorrow eases to make decisions about adopting another companion. However, some people find that adopting a new companion immediately is very helpful in easing the stress of deep sorrow, and some people never adopt another companion - - for whatever reason. The most important thing is that you follow your heart, Rhi.

Whatever you decide, Rhi, one of the many things you need to remember is that you are not alone in your grief journey. Each of us here DO understand what you are going through, and we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us.

Thank you so much for sharing your beloved Micky with us, Rhi. We would truly love to see a picture(s) of him, and yes, it's quite okay to post them here. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, Rhi, and please let us know how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Thank you, I really appreciate it. I really feel like I want another cat but I just don't know if it's too soon. My wife would agree to get one, she wants one too, I just feel a bit lost on it.

Here are some pictures of Micky


Radiator Love by anxiousgeek, on Flickr


Micky by anxiousgeek, on Flickr

Okay well I just made an inquiry about a kitten so I must want a cat.

This is much harder than hamsters are.

Micky is adorable. I am so sorry about your loss and I hope you are able to do the best you can with coping. I lost my cat Lily of 14 years a month and a day ago. It was decided a bit after we lost her that we would have a new kitten for the holidays because how much joy cats do bring. Its not to replace her but to start loving another pet again. We will keep her in our memories in our heart and honor her in any way we can. I felt lost on it as well but I can't help but always to want one in my life and to have some company.

Hi, Rhi, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing and the wonderful pictures of your beloved Micky. He is soooo handsome!! I'm smiling at the "radiator love" picture - - there's just nothing like a nice warm place to enjoy sweet dreams - - be they sunbeams or a warm radiator.

Rhi, there is no "wrong" time to embrace a new companion. If your heart feels ready for a new lifetime companion then it is the RIGHT time for you and your wife to seek "the one" to share your hearts and home. Since the holidays are approaching very quickly, may I offer a few tips from the Humane Society of the United States: If you are going to be doing any holiday entertaining or may be planning a holiday trip to visit friends / family, you may want to wait until after the holidays to finalize adoption. This will lessen the stress on your new companion in his / her adjustment to his / her new Forever Home. I know your beloved Micky is already guiding your and your wife's paths to that moment in time when you will meet your new lifetime companion. Please let us know how things go.

I hope today is treating you kindly, Rhi, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Micky's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and please let us know how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Rhi,
I'm so sorry about Micky. He is beautiful. I can't really add anything to what the wonderful moon_beam wrote; your heart will tell you when you're ready for a new kitty.
I lost my dog Wolfie 5 1/2 weeks ago. It still feels strange to write that. The supportive and wonderful people here have been a godsend. Know we're all here for you.

Wishing you peace,
Kelly