This is my first time writing here. I have been reading comments on the site for a week now through my tears. I lost my wonderful boy Rosco on 24/2/2012. This is a wonderful site as it has already provided me with much needed support. My beautiful golden spaniel died a week ago and I have barely been able to cope. He was 14 years old and I have hardly been apart from him since he was 8 weeks old.
He died after a short illness with a chest infection which weakened his heart. But I was so unprepared. I had only been at the vet the week before, and he did not seem unduly worried, just said to bring him back if the cough came back. He had some arthritis in his back legs which slowed him down, but that was all. Two days before he stopped eating and then I knew he was not well, but it was still so sudden.
I can not stop crying and can not stop thinking about him.
I miss him so much, and I keep looking for him.
Hoping for some support through this terrible time.
Helen

Oh Roscoe's mom

Please accept my most loving condolences on the passing oof beautiful Roscoe. It's never the "right" time - and the longer you've been together, the more it hurts. It hurts because we love (NOT loved) them and, even more they love us. We hurt in proportion as we loved and from your posting I can tell you and Roscoe shared that special love of soul-mates.

Even though tight now you must feel like every minute is a rifle shot to the heart, "hang on, just a little while longer" (as the old hymn says). And what choice do we have? I lost my Gretta, the kindest chocolate lab who ever lived, last April and I still cry for her - especially every time I post here! I
m a solo, sso when Gretta went back to the Perfect World, my house was empty and silent. ONly another dog lover could understand my taking her two snowsuits and velcro-ing them together to make a pillow to sleep on - and then I slept on her special orthopedic dog bed for a week. Oh how I missed that girl!!

Roscoe's mom, you've come to exactly the right place. Every one of us in the LS family has been or is going through the heartbreak of separating from a beloved fur baby. It's SO hard, for lost of reasons. One is that animals do things honestly - they don't have "agendas" - we love them, they love us. period. No matter what ay have happened in their previous lives (Gretta was a rescue at age 9), they thanks us every day thousands of times over for our love and care. And then they're gone. We can't see them, hear them, play with them, pet them ..... BUT ... they're NOT gone. They're really right there on their jobs - watching over us, protecting us, loving us and being loved by us. We just can't see or hear or sense them. And that's what cuts our hearts to ribbons. Rest assured - Roscoe is right next to you right now - in spirit form - which is as actual as physical form. He loves you more now than before. He's kissing away every tear - and couldn't they flood an ocean?

Roscoe's mom, we're always here for you. We're a band of brothers and sisters joined by the privilege of having been loved by a special soul-mate. Together we're strong and we hold each other up during the rough times. Everyone here loves you and has an open heart for you to rely on.

Please have the best day you can, Roscoe's mom, and may it be filled with at least a moment or two of peace.

Blessings,

Gretta's mom

Hi, Helen, please permit me to add my sincerest sympathies in the physical loss of your beloved Roscoe. Losing a companion is never easy regardless of the circumstances or how long we are blessed with the privilege of their company.

Helen, this grief journey is one of the most painful experiences we will know on this side of eternity. It is one of adjusting to the physical absence of our companion, and this is painful both emotionally and physically. Unfortunately there is no easy way through this adjustment journey. There is no fast forward or delete button you can press to make it go faster or eliminate it completely. It is a journey that can only be traveled one day at a time, sometimes one moment at a time. It is a journey that you will not have to travel alone, Helen. Each of us here do understand what you are going through, and we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us.

I know there are no adequate words in any language that can soothe the seering pain of loss that is in your heart. But I promise you, Helen, that one day when you least expect it you will be thinking of your beloved Roscoe and you will find yourself smiling, truly smiling, and your heart will fill with the warmth of your many treasured memories and you will hear your beloved Roscoe saying, "It's okay, mum. I here with you. I am always with you in your heart and your memories - - for you are always with me - -I am always a heartbeat close to you."

Helen, thank you so much for sharing your beloved Roscoe with us. Perhaps sometime you will feel up to sharing a picture(s) of him with us - - but only when / if you want to. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, Helen, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Good morning Roscoe's mom

Just checking in to see how you are doing. You and beautiful Roscoe are in my thoughts and prayers. And remember Roscoe is right there with you - only a breath away. Up there in the Perfect World .... bragging about you and playing with all his new doggie friends and ..... getting a welcome party ready for when he sees you again.

Have a peaceful day.

Gretta's mom

Thank you to Gretta's mum and Moon Beam for your wonderful words of support.

They DO mean SO much. I am sorry I have not replied earlier but I have read your comments and cried so much it was hard to write. The house is so empty and everywhere there
are reminders of him. I don't know how I am going to cope with this.

The LS site has been the most support I have found, to realise other people feel the same.

I feel like I have no one else to talk to who understands how I feel now.

I have to keep going to work and am having a hard time concentrating.

All I think about is coming home and him not there.

Thank you again for your beautiful words, I try to think of them all the time to keep me going.

Please write back soon,

Rosco's mum

Hi, Helen, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. I do so remember the drives to work gut-wrenching sobbing, then having to put on the "public face" to go into the office and work as though nothing was wrong. Thank goodness for the privacy of the restroom where I could retreat to regain my composure so that I could go back to my desk to resume my work. And then there was the gut-wrenching sobbing on the drive home - - the dam broken loose from being penned up during the day. And the incredibly painful reality of coming through the door and for that awful split second calling my baby's name - - and then remembering - - he / she is now with the angels.

It is only after the deep grief eases that my heart can truly know that my beloved companion is always with me, and as I call his / her name now it is with the reassurance that he / she hears me and is still ever so happy to hear the sound of my voice drifting heavenward just for him / her.

The same is true for your beloved Roscoe. I promise you, Helen, this deep grief will ease, and one day you will find yourself being able to concentrate once again, and smile - - truly smile - - when you think of your beloved Roscoe. You will call his name, and you will hear his soft voice in your heart say, "I'm right here, mum, always and forever."

I hope today is treating you kindly, Helen, and that you will have a peaceful evening. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Hi Moon Beam,

Thanks again for your kind thoughts today. I do have to hope my beautiful boy is in a better place now, but at the moment I just miss him SO much.

I can't bear to put anything away and yet it hurts so much to see it, but I still need to see his things. We were together for 14 years and it was so sudden at the end and I was so unprepared for it.

My only peace comes from the fact that he just went to sleep at home with me and it was very quick. But that is what makes it so hard. Apart from his cough I had no other warning.

He had no other illness or dementia, the vet had said only a week before just to keep an eye on him and nothing else.

He had such a big heart and gave me so much love, he never wanted to be away from me. I have had other dogs but never one like him nor for so long.

Thanks for listening again and for your thoughts of peace.

Helen - Rosco's mum

Hi, Helen, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. This grief journey is a very painful adjustment - - both emotionally and physically - - to the physical absence of our beloved companions. I do so know what you are going through.

There is no rush to put your beloved Rosco's things away. Give yourself time to have some of the stress of your grief ease before you try to make any "decisions." I still have my beloved Oslo's toys out and about, and I have a life size stuffed toy Black Lab in the corner that wears his seatbelt harness and collars. So, there is no rush for you to make any decisions about your beloved Rosco's belongings.

Helen, I hope today is being kind to you, and that you will have a peaceful evening blessed with your beloved Rosco's sweet Living Spirit to comfort you. I know it isn't the same, but he truly is forever with you, Helen - - he is always and forever a heartbeat close to you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and I look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Thank you again Moon Beam for your kind words of support.

Feeling very lonely tonight by myself.

Not used to the empty house. Mornings and night times are the worst.

Thanks for the prayers,

Rosco's mum.

Hi, Helen, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. Yes, the mornings and the evenings can be particularly challenging during the deep grief. Unfortunately the only thing you can do is just hang on tight to each of us here and ride this horror roller coaster ride. I promise you each of us are here for you, with you, and beside you through every twist and turn, up and down and turnaround.

I hope today is being kind to you, Helen, and that you will have a peaceful evening. Thank you so very much for sharing your beloved Rosco with us. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Hi Helen, please allow me to offer you my sincere sympathies on the loss of your precious Rosco. I lost my cat, Danny, more than 2 months ago. The first few weeks were the hardest for me. I kept looking for him in his favorite napping spaces, and I felt so empty and disoriented. I know it makes it especially hard for you since you had Rosco for so long and that he was so special to you. It has comforted me to just hold one of Danny's blanket and just cry. It may comfort you to hang on to Rosco's belongings and not make any big changes for now. It can also help to start a journal and write down how you feel. We are all here for you in this forum to offer comfort, support, and encouragement.

Hugs,
DannysMom

Thank you Danny's mum for your kind words of comfort and support.

It is very appreciated. You also know how hard it is to lose a beloved animal. This forum has been a big help to me, as most people do not seem to
understand the level of feelings that you go through. I can't bear to move his belongings yet and I do hold his coat and just cry.

Thank you again for your reply and your comforting words, it really does help.

I hope you too find some peace.

Helen - Rosco's Mum