QUOTE (Lucie @ Feb 28 2012, 01:17 PM)
Hello All,
Firstly I apologize if this is against site rules- I have searched to see if it is, but have found nothing so am assuming its ok.. Mods please delete this if its not.
My doggy Ginger died just over a year ago and the impact it had upon me was tremendous, I was also greatly struck by how little society in general understands about pet loss and how little support I and my family was offered. I decided then that I wanted to write my masters thesis on this topic and explore the experiences of others who have suffered a pet bereavement in greater depth.
My study is qualitative, meaning I am interested in the lived experiences of participants. I would love to hear from anyone who would like to share their experiences with me.. you can volunteer as much or as little information as you would like. Ideally I would love to conduct a relaxed informal interview with you over a messenger service (msn,facebook etc) but this isnt essential- any help would be very welcome! In return I would offer you the opportunity to explore and share your experiences and to be involved in some potentially important research
I'm really hoping that someone is interested- please either reply to me via email or to this thread and I will send you the extra information
Lucie
P.s Attached is the creature that has inspired me. RIP Ginger <3
I absolutely would love to participate. I lost my cat just a week ago but know so many others feel this pain that is not accepted in our society today! I only have my grandparents and parents death and one good friend to relate death wise and I have lost two cats. One back in 2000 she was Tux and I had her for 5 years and I had to put her to sleep because of kidney failure. I felt blessed that she did not have to suffer one more day than needed. Then one week ago I lost my "baby" Bootsie who I always told she was sent by God and by Tux to help momma heal my broken heart-she would literally give me those cat eyes and lightly close and open them when I told her this. This is where people think we are not the same and where society judges and does not support the grief we feel when we lose what we consider our children. They are not just pets to most owners. They to me were family in every sense of the way. To me, they are like a baby because they can't express what they feel or think. They don't have a voice like a human does but they have their way of letting us know if they needed us in some way or if they were hungry they would try to get our attentions. If I had one way to compare it to others who gave birth to a baby and that baby never grew beyond the age of 18 mos. or lets say 2 years and those parents had to keep caring for that child-feeding, cleaning, having them with them most of the time other than while working, etc. and that child stayed that age and lets say 5-20 years later that baby died they would be devastated-there would be a memorial, families would gather, they would get support and condolensces, friends and family would bring flowers and food, etc. you get my point. When our babies pass and we go through grief we probably get a phone call saying how sorry they are for our "sadness". They tell us to remember that we gave them a good(inmy case 12 years) and they tell me my bootsie was happy! Then maybe if we are lucky we get a few sympathy cards(I did from family that have children and have had their own cats or dogs). Then they will say how are you doing once in a while but its forgotten, its not talked about. The support turns to move on and get another pet! Its almost as if my baby didn't exist anymore. If it were a human child or a parent, wife, spouse, friend, etc. there is so much more support and acknowledgement of our pain and grief. I don't even know how to describe it to be honest. I think right now as I am typing this I am going through my angry stage as its so fresh for me(not even a week) but I am angry that more friends and family didn't reach out to me to be honest. Yes, I posted my "obituary" if you will have it the early morning on facebook to let all my loved ones and friends that it was a sad sad day and things took a turn for the worst and bootsie died in my arms. I got my sympathies under that post...but to be honest only a hand few have called after that to talk about it-we are left to deal with our grief on our own and it truly hurts so much more because of that. Not like when my mom passed for example and we all gathered. I get that my other family members were not close to Bootsie-and I am not saying we should have had a funeral but I am saying is that I just wish others GOT that this pain is REAL, it should not be negated that this pain and this sadness, guilt, etc. I feel is anything less than what it is! So, if you still want me to participate in your study after this long BOOK, lol-I would love to. It would help so many I think. My email is: brodie.patti@yahoo.com Thanks