I found this forum out of grief and disbelief of losing our beloved German Shepherd, Ginger. She was the happiest, prettiest soul I had ever met. She was the protector of our other 2 dogs and our children (especially our youngest son who is 8). I couldn't sleep at all because I didn't want to re-awaken to this nightmare. So I tossed and turned all night.
I realized a large problem I have is that I don't know what to think of. I am trying not to think of the last horrible few days when the disease viciously and mercilessly reared its ugly head. But when I think of her, I see how happy she was and how much she loved life. She danced at the waters edge of the lake which only had to be there to make her happy. She danced in circles just to see you walk in the door. She brought her toys to show so we would tell her how cute they were and she would deliberately walk under the table so the cloth would drape her head and we would all tell her what a pretty girl she was. And thinking of this makes me cry so hard I don't think I will ever stop. My children cry with me and I tell them it is okay to let it out. But I have to hide to cry more. Tonight will be unbearable to go to bed without her at our feet. My husband works away during the week and she made us feel safe. (She was a beautiful, sweet soul and made herself very scary when unknowns were outside or close by.)
So what should I think of to stop crying? My heart is broken and things will never be the same without her. I really want to know that she is happy where she is. I guess it hurts knowing how much she loved this earth and all of the sudden she is not here. She was too young to leave. That part hurts just as much as missing her. Please give me any suggestions of what I should be thinking of to stop crying. If anyone knows in their heart for some reason that our beloved animal family-members are happy once they've crossed over, please let me know. I just need comfort. Thank you and thank you for this forum.
Full Version: I Lost My Beautiful Ginger
Hi, cindy, please permit me to offer you my sincerest sympathies in the physical loss of your beloved Ginger. Losing a beloved companion is never easy regardless of the circumstances or how long we are blessed with the privilege of their company.
Cindy, it is important that you allow yourself the opportunity to cry - - openly with your children as well as privately. What you are going through is perfectly normal in your deep grief. The seering pain that is in your heart needs a healthy outlet, and crying is very healthy because your tears are literally healing tears as they literally cleanse the body of the toxins that build up in our bodies through the stress of grief. Some people think that if they suppress their grief that it will help make the loss less painful. Clinical studies prove the opposite is true. Grief that is suppressed will eventually need to be acknowledged, and by the time it surfaces to the point where it can no longer be ignored there could be both physical and emotional burdens that accompany it. So, please give yourself permission to cry as you feel the timing is appropriate. I promise you, Cindy, there will come a time when your tears will diminish, when this seering pain in your heart will ease, and you will be able to smile again.
I wish there were an easier way through this grief journey but unfortunately there are no fast forward or delete buttons to press to make it go away or disappear. This grief journey can only be traveled one day at a time, sometimes one moment at a time in your own way and your own time. It is a journey of "adjustment" of no longer having your beloved Ginger's physical presence with you, which is a very painful adjustment both physically and emotionally. Right now and for awhile yet to come there will be "firsts" to endure through - - the first holiday, the first birthday, the first week, the first month - - always aware that your beloved Ginger is now sharing your earthly journey from heaven's perfect garden instead of in your arms.
The good news is that your beloved Ginger IS with you now just as she always has been and always will be. The love bond you and your beloved Ginger share is eternal. It is not restricted to the physical laws of time and space. Her sweet Living Spirit is forever with you in your heart and your memories, and nothing can ever diminish or take her away from you. She is always and forever a heartbeat close to you.
Cindy, I know there are no words in any language that can soothe the tremendous pain you are feeling right now. Among many things you need to remember is that you are not alone in your grief journey. Each of us here do understand what you are going through and we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us.
Thank you so much for sharing your beloved Ginger with us, and perhaps sometime you will feel up to sharing picture(s) of her with us. I hope and pray that as you read through each of the responses shared by our forum friends that you will find comfort, support, and encouragement. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, cindy, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.
Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
Cindy, it is important that you allow yourself the opportunity to cry - - openly with your children as well as privately. What you are going through is perfectly normal in your deep grief. The seering pain that is in your heart needs a healthy outlet, and crying is very healthy because your tears are literally healing tears as they literally cleanse the body of the toxins that build up in our bodies through the stress of grief. Some people think that if they suppress their grief that it will help make the loss less painful. Clinical studies prove the opposite is true. Grief that is suppressed will eventually need to be acknowledged, and by the time it surfaces to the point where it can no longer be ignored there could be both physical and emotional burdens that accompany it. So, please give yourself permission to cry as you feel the timing is appropriate. I promise you, Cindy, there will come a time when your tears will diminish, when this seering pain in your heart will ease, and you will be able to smile again.
I wish there were an easier way through this grief journey but unfortunately there are no fast forward or delete buttons to press to make it go away or disappear. This grief journey can only be traveled one day at a time, sometimes one moment at a time in your own way and your own time. It is a journey of "adjustment" of no longer having your beloved Ginger's physical presence with you, which is a very painful adjustment both physically and emotionally. Right now and for awhile yet to come there will be "firsts" to endure through - - the first holiday, the first birthday, the first week, the first month - - always aware that your beloved Ginger is now sharing your earthly journey from heaven's perfect garden instead of in your arms.
The good news is that your beloved Ginger IS with you now just as she always has been and always will be. The love bond you and your beloved Ginger share is eternal. It is not restricted to the physical laws of time and space. Her sweet Living Spirit is forever with you in your heart and your memories, and nothing can ever diminish or take her away from you. She is always and forever a heartbeat close to you.
Cindy, I know there are no words in any language that can soothe the tremendous pain you are feeling right now. Among many things you need to remember is that you are not alone in your grief journey. Each of us here do understand what you are going through and we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us.
Thank you so much for sharing your beloved Ginger with us, and perhaps sometime you will feel up to sharing picture(s) of her with us. I hope and pray that as you read through each of the responses shared by our forum friends that you will find comfort, support, and encouragement. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, cindy, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.
Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
QUOTE (cindyp @ Aug 30 2011, 03:28 AM) 
I found this forum out of grief and disbelief of losing our beloved German Shepherd, Ginger. She was the happiest, prettiest soul I had ever met. She was the protector of our other 2 dogs and our children (especially our youngest son who is 8). I couldn't sleep at all because I didn't want to re-awaken to this nightmare. So I tossed and turned all night.
I realized a large problem I have is that I don't know what to think of. I am trying not to think of the last horrible few days when the disease viciously and mercilessly reared its ugly head. But when I think of her, I see how happy she was and how much she loved life. She danced at the waters edge of the lake which only had to be there to make her happy. She danced in circles just to see you walk in the door. She brought her toys to show so we would tell her how cute they were and she would deliberately walk under the table so the cloth would drape her head and we would all tell her what a pretty girl she was. And thinking of this makes me cry so hard I don't think I will ever stop. My children cry with me and I tell them it is okay to let it out. But I have to hide to cry more. Tonight will be unbearable to go to bed without her at our feet. My husband works away during the week and she made us feel safe. (She was a beautiful, sweet soul and made herself very scary when unknowns were outside or close by.)
So what should I think of to stop crying? My heart is broken and things will never be the same without her. I really want to know that she is happy where she is. I guess it hurts knowing how much she loved this earth and all of the sudden she is not here. She was too young to leave. That part hurts just as much as missing her. Please give me any suggestions of what I should be thinking of to stop crying. If anyone knows in their heart for some reason that our beloved animal family-members are happy once they've crossed over, please let me know. I just need comfort. Thank you and thank you for this forum.
I realized a large problem I have is that I don't know what to think of. I am trying not to think of the last horrible few days when the disease viciously and mercilessly reared its ugly head. But when I think of her, I see how happy she was and how much she loved life. She danced at the waters edge of the lake which only had to be there to make her happy. She danced in circles just to see you walk in the door. She brought her toys to show so we would tell her how cute they were and she would deliberately walk under the table so the cloth would drape her head and we would all tell her what a pretty girl she was. And thinking of this makes me cry so hard I don't think I will ever stop. My children cry with me and I tell them it is okay to let it out. But I have to hide to cry more. Tonight will be unbearable to go to bed without her at our feet. My husband works away during the week and she made us feel safe. (She was a beautiful, sweet soul and made herself very scary when unknowns were outside or close by.)
So what should I think of to stop crying? My heart is broken and things will never be the same without her. I really want to know that she is happy where she is. I guess it hurts knowing how much she loved this earth and all of the sudden she is not here. She was too young to leave. That part hurts just as much as missing her. Please give me any suggestions of what I should be thinking of to stop crying. If anyone knows in their heart for some reason that our beloved animal family-members are happy once they've crossed over, please let me know. I just need comfort. Thank you and thank you for this forum.
Dear Cindyp,just wanted to tell you that i know exactly how you feel,German Shepherds really are like no other dogs,my ex boyfriend and i had 1 and she too was so sweet and an amazing protector,i used to walk in the winter in the park at 10pm and feel completely safe,she would never let anything happen to me.I would love to see a photo of Ginger if you feel able to share them?I am so sorry for your children but they obviously loved her so much,children heal quicker than we do though and your tears and sorrow will last so much longer if not forever.There is a poem called 'Rainbow Bridge' it has been such a huge comfort to me,i cried so hard when i read it but afterwards i knew that the furbabies i have lost are at this special place,i am sure that you will find it a comfort too,i really hope this helps at this awfully sad time for you,take care.xx
Dear Cindy
My heart goes out to you at the passing of your darling Ginger. Like Moombeam says, crying is absolutely needed right now. Everyone here remembers the first few days (or weeks) that we cried non-stop. Your life has been shocked, you heart has been shattered. It feels like it will never end or never be any different. it will, but it's impossible to believe that right now. Be sad, be angry, be anything that you need to be. There IS a huge hole in your life. Routines are disrupted. There is no "waggy-tail" to greet you .... a thousand things. And they hurt us humans more because we are creatures of senses ... if we don't see, touch, hear something, it's not real. But that's not true. Love is forever and infinite and everywhere. My wonderful vet said words about Gretta that I will never forget: "She's in a safe place now." Your Ginger is with her. So are all the other animals who have shaken off their earthly body and gone to play while they wait for us in the Perfect World.
Welcome to the Lightnign Strike family, Cindy. We'll always be here for you. We Do get it b/c we've all been through it. We're all at different points on this grief journey. And all our doggies and kitties and bunnies and ferrets and parrots and every living being with which we've shared our lives are together, bragging about thier mom's and dad's and awaiting the time when we join them - never again to be separated.
Please be kind to yourself today. You SO deserve it.
In remembrance,
Gretta's mom
My heart goes out to you at the passing of your darling Ginger. Like Moombeam says, crying is absolutely needed right now. Everyone here remembers the first few days (or weeks) that we cried non-stop. Your life has been shocked, you heart has been shattered. It feels like it will never end or never be any different. it will, but it's impossible to believe that right now. Be sad, be angry, be anything that you need to be. There IS a huge hole in your life. Routines are disrupted. There is no "waggy-tail" to greet you .... a thousand things. And they hurt us humans more because we are creatures of senses ... if we don't see, touch, hear something, it's not real. But that's not true. Love is forever and infinite and everywhere. My wonderful vet said words about Gretta that I will never forget: "She's in a safe place now." Your Ginger is with her. So are all the other animals who have shaken off their earthly body and gone to play while they wait for us in the Perfect World.
Welcome to the Lightnign Strike family, Cindy. We'll always be here for you. We Do get it b/c we've all been through it. We're all at different points on this grief journey. And all our doggies and kitties and bunnies and ferrets and parrots and every living being with which we've shared our lives are together, bragging about thier mom's and dad's and awaiting the time when we join them - never again to be separated.
Please be kind to yourself today. You SO deserve it.
In remembrance,
Gretta's mom
Thank you, all, for your kind words and support. My Gingerbear (her nickname) was the most beautiful, sweetest girl I had ever met. I thought I was better today and ten minutes later i was crying all over again. I wanted to reply earlier but I couldn't see through the tears. I want to post pictures, but I cannot bear to look at any yet. I see one that my husband posted on facebook and I cry uncontrollably again. I hate having lost her and I feel guilty and I feel lost and wonder why I couldn't save her. I feel stupid for not knowing something sooner and horrible for not having taken her for tests sooner. I feel like I have failed the most precious doggy I have every met in my life. God, please forgive me. I love her. I have started crying again cannot see the computer so I have to go. Thank you, again.
Hi, Cindy, thank you so very much for sharing with us how you're doing. I do so relate to not being able to see the computer screen or the keyboard for the waterfall of tears. Let them flow, Cindy, for this is what your heart needs to release the deep sorrow you are feeling. Don't worry about the pictures. What you are feeling about looking at them - - not being able to look at them -- is perfectly normal. The precious memories of your beloved Ginger that are captured on film and / or computer chip will always be there whenever you are ready to visit them and recall the moments of how they were taken. There is no rush to post them, Cindy.
Cindy, our beloved companions are artists at disguising how badly they are feeling until they cannot hide the symptoms any longer. By the time they reveal how badly they are feeling, and we are able to seek medical intervention for them, the illness is usually very far advanced. Sometimes medical intervention can help to relieve the symptoms and provide a quality of life for awhile longer, and sometimes no amount of medical intervention can change the course of the illness. So please do NOT punish yourself for events that truly are beyond your control. One of the hardest things to reconcile during our grief journey is that we are "mere mortals" - - we are not gifted with the knowledge of foresight, only the "wisdom" that comes from hindsight. This is the source of our guilt when the results of events do not turn out favorably -- when we are unable to preserve our precious companions' physical journey with us - - when we must make the hardest decision we will know on this side of eternity to release them from their failing, frail, painful physical bodies. Please believe me when I say you have NOT failed your beloved Ginger, for each of us here know the challenge of working through the "second guessing" of the deep grief.
I promise you, Cindy, that you will endure through this grief journey, and there will come a time when the seering pain that is in your heart now will ease so that you can remember your beloved Ginger with a happy heart - - for this is what she wants so much for you. She does not want you entrenched in deep sorrow and remorse and misplaced guilt, for this will rob you of the joy of the eternal love you share, and the blessing of her sweet Living Spirit forever a part of you.
Unfortunately to get to this point in your grief journey means enduring the darkness of your deep grief one day at a time, sometimes one moment at a time. I know I stress this in each of my posts, and so I will stress it again with you: It is vitally important that you know you are not alone, and that what you are feeling is very normal. Please know we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us. There are no recriminations here, so please feel free to share with us whatever is in your heart and on your mind.
Cindy, I hope what I have shared with you will be some comfort and encouragement to you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and am here to share with you how you're doing.
Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
Cindy, our beloved companions are artists at disguising how badly they are feeling until they cannot hide the symptoms any longer. By the time they reveal how badly they are feeling, and we are able to seek medical intervention for them, the illness is usually very far advanced. Sometimes medical intervention can help to relieve the symptoms and provide a quality of life for awhile longer, and sometimes no amount of medical intervention can change the course of the illness. So please do NOT punish yourself for events that truly are beyond your control. One of the hardest things to reconcile during our grief journey is that we are "mere mortals" - - we are not gifted with the knowledge of foresight, only the "wisdom" that comes from hindsight. This is the source of our guilt when the results of events do not turn out favorably -- when we are unable to preserve our precious companions' physical journey with us - - when we must make the hardest decision we will know on this side of eternity to release them from their failing, frail, painful physical bodies. Please believe me when I say you have NOT failed your beloved Ginger, for each of us here know the challenge of working through the "second guessing" of the deep grief.
I promise you, Cindy, that you will endure through this grief journey, and there will come a time when the seering pain that is in your heart now will ease so that you can remember your beloved Ginger with a happy heart - - for this is what she wants so much for you. She does not want you entrenched in deep sorrow and remorse and misplaced guilt, for this will rob you of the joy of the eternal love you share, and the blessing of her sweet Living Spirit forever a part of you.
Unfortunately to get to this point in your grief journey means enduring the darkness of your deep grief one day at a time, sometimes one moment at a time. I know I stress this in each of my posts, and so I will stress it again with you: It is vitally important that you know you are not alone, and that what you are feeling is very normal. Please know we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us. There are no recriminations here, so please feel free to share with us whatever is in your heart and on your mind.
Cindy, I hope what I have shared with you will be some comfort and encouragement to you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and am here to share with you how you're doing.
Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
Thank you, again, the posting and the support are helping. It helps me to cry, and it helps to know I'm not the only one to feel guilty. By reading the other posts, I see that I am not the only one to play the "what if" game over and over and over.
Now I feel guilty about not being able to look at pictures. A friend came over and brought flowers this morning and I felt lucky to have a friend like her. Another called to let me know how sorry she and her family were - she is my dog's "babysitter" for when we have to go out of town. I felt better. One of these friends asked if I wanted to get pictures and make a memorial for her. I was too embarrassed to tell her I couldn't bear to look at any yet. I feel guilty, like maybe I don't deserve to or something. I can't quite pinpoint it.
I can do some normal things like school work with my children, housework (within reason). I don't want to clean too much because I feel like I don't want to clean Ginger away. I just brushed off her bed in the main living room and cried at the touch of her beautiful fur. I rubbed it on my cheek and cried because I will never touch her softness again. I will never get kisses or hugs ever again. I posted a tribute/eulogy to her and realized I have to go back and edit it. I forgot to mention one of her most unique and beautiful rituals; she literally hugged. She would come to you while you were sitting, get up on her hind legs and wrap her front legs around your waist, then press her head on your chest or stomach; and just hug. It was so beautiful. I have to cry some more.
I finally stopped crying and saw that my sister said "RIP little clown face" which was sweet and beautiful and made me cry again. I miss her so much. I work from home on the computer and I'm frozen and cannot do any of my own work. I love her so much and I miss her more than anything.
Now I feel guilty about not being able to look at pictures. A friend came over and brought flowers this morning and I felt lucky to have a friend like her. Another called to let me know how sorry she and her family were - she is my dog's "babysitter" for when we have to go out of town. I felt better. One of these friends asked if I wanted to get pictures and make a memorial for her. I was too embarrassed to tell her I couldn't bear to look at any yet. I feel guilty, like maybe I don't deserve to or something. I can't quite pinpoint it.
I can do some normal things like school work with my children, housework (within reason). I don't want to clean too much because I feel like I don't want to clean Ginger away. I just brushed off her bed in the main living room and cried at the touch of her beautiful fur. I rubbed it on my cheek and cried because I will never touch her softness again. I will never get kisses or hugs ever again. I posted a tribute/eulogy to her and realized I have to go back and edit it. I forgot to mention one of her most unique and beautiful rituals; she literally hugged. She would come to you while you were sitting, get up on her hind legs and wrap her front legs around your waist, then press her head on your chest or stomach; and just hug. It was so beautiful. I have to cry some more.
I finally stopped crying and saw that my sister said "RIP little clown face" which was sweet and beautiful and made me cry again. I miss her so much. I work from home on the computer and I'm frozen and cannot do any of my own work. I love her so much and I miss her more than anything.
Hi, Cindy, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. Not being able to look at your beloved Ginger's pictures yet is very normal, for right now they are yet another blatant reminder that your beloved Ginger is no longer physically with you. It's okay to wait to do a memorial until YOU are ready to decide what you want to do, Cindy. So, please do NOT feel guilty about this. Remember - - this is YOUR grief journey to be traveled in YOUR own time and in YOUR own way.
Clinical professionals highly recommend that people who are experiencing high stress situations find ways to take unnecessary stress off, and I'm so glad you are finding ways to do this - - like not forcing yourself to do housework in the way you would probably normally do it.
And it's perfectly normal for you to feel like NOT cleaning - - for your feelings of not wanting to clean Ginger away. When you come across her fur as you clean, you can pick it up and put it in a zip lock baggie. This is what I have done, and many others, and it's one of the ways we can keep our beloved companions with us.
"I rubbed it on my cheek and cried because I will never touch her softness again. I will never get kisses or hugs ever again."
Cindy, saving your beloved Ginger's fur will be of comfort to you, so that you can feel her fur whenever you need to. Yes, unfortunately one of the many difficult adjustments in this grief journey is not having the blessing of our beloved companion's physical kisses and hugs. BUT - - you WILL have them again - - when it is your appropriate time to join your beloved Ginger in eternal joy. And I promise you, Cindy, you WILL BE reunited with her for all eternity.
For now, though, you are faced with the enormous task of continuing to live your earthly journey in a way that honor the eternal love you share with your beloved Ginger. It's an ENORMOUS adjustment, and it is one that you will always have the support and encouragement of each of us here in your journey. I promise you, Cindy, you will endure this - - it just takes time.
Thank you so very much for sharing your beloved Ginger with us, Cindy. I hope you and your family will have a very peaceful evening. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.
Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
Clinical professionals highly recommend that people who are experiencing high stress situations find ways to take unnecessary stress off, and I'm so glad you are finding ways to do this - - like not forcing yourself to do housework in the way you would probably normally do it.
And it's perfectly normal for you to feel like NOT cleaning - - for your feelings of not wanting to clean Ginger away. When you come across her fur as you clean, you can pick it up and put it in a zip lock baggie. This is what I have done, and many others, and it's one of the ways we can keep our beloved companions with us.
"I rubbed it on my cheek and cried because I will never touch her softness again. I will never get kisses or hugs ever again."
Cindy, saving your beloved Ginger's fur will be of comfort to you, so that you can feel her fur whenever you need to. Yes, unfortunately one of the many difficult adjustments in this grief journey is not having the blessing of our beloved companion's physical kisses and hugs. BUT - - you WILL have them again - - when it is your appropriate time to join your beloved Ginger in eternal joy. And I promise you, Cindy, you WILL BE reunited with her for all eternity.
For now, though, you are faced with the enormous task of continuing to live your earthly journey in a way that honor the eternal love you share with your beloved Ginger. It's an ENORMOUS adjustment, and it is one that you will always have the support and encouragement of each of us here in your journey. I promise you, Cindy, you will endure this - - it just takes time.
Thank you so very much for sharing your beloved Ginger with us, Cindy. I hope you and your family will have a very peaceful evening. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.
Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
Well it has been 3 full days since the loss of my beautiful Ginger baby. And I am still so ridden with guilt, horror and disbelief. I feel like I failed her. She apparently had kidney disease for some time. But she drank the same water she had always drank. She went potty the same as the other 2 doggies. I feel so horrible about not getting a blood test for her earlier. I can never forgive myself and I am afraid of that she is wondering why Mommy didn't help her sooner. I love her with all my heart and I wish I could know that she is okay and knows how much she was loved. Today I am guilty and even partly numb.
So sorry for your loss! I lost my Bonnie to kidney failure also. There were no symptoms until literally overnight she got sick. The vet says usually when a dog shows symptoms the kidneys are at least 75% gone. It is instinctual for them to hide illness. There is most likely no way you could have known.
I share your grief and sorrow and please know we are all thinking of you. We will see them again!
I share your grief and sorrow and please know we are all thinking of you. We will see them again!
Hi, Cindy, thank you so much for sharing with us how you're doing. Cindy, this grief journey is a process - - a journey where the deepest emotions of sorrow can only ease with time - - more time than what 3 days, 7 days, 30 days - - 6 months - - may take.
"I feel so horrible about not getting a blood test for her earlier. I can never forgive myself and I am afraid of that she is wondering why Mommy didn't help her sooner."
Cindy, I assure you that your beloved Ginger knows beyond all shadow of a doubt that you love her and would do everything within your human ability to give her a healthy and happy earthly journey. Your beloved Ginger is not wondering why you didn't help her sooner. Instead, she is eternally grateful to you for your eternal love for her. She does not want you shackled in deep grief and all the emotions that accompany this journey, for this will rob you of the joy of your cherished memories and the blessing of your Ginger's sweet Living Spirit in your heart. She will always be with you, Cindy.
Cindy, unfortunately guilt is one of the many emotions everyone goes through to some extent in this grief journey, and it can be one of the hardest to reconcile. Some people think that if they allow themselves to smile again, to remember their beloved companions with a happy heart, that they will forget their companion. Some people think that not feeling guilty somehow dishonors their beloved companion. I assure you, Cindy, that your beloved Ginger's first and foremost desire is for you to cherish her earthly journey with you. And I promise you that you will NEVER forget your beloved Ginger no matter how much time you continue in your earthly journey. It is impossible for you to forget your Ginger, for she is forever a part of you - - she is forever a heartbeat close to you. I hope and pray that as your grief eases you will be able to smile when you think of your beloved Ginger, and feel the warmth of her sweet Living Spirit tenderly embraced in your heart.
Cindy, in this early stage of your grief journey there are going to be more rough days to endure with all the horror roller coaster emotions that accompany it. We are here for you, Cindy, so hold on tight to us - - I promise you we will not let go until you are ready.
Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers, Cindy, and please let us know how you're doing.
Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
"I feel so horrible about not getting a blood test for her earlier. I can never forgive myself and I am afraid of that she is wondering why Mommy didn't help her sooner."
Cindy, I assure you that your beloved Ginger knows beyond all shadow of a doubt that you love her and would do everything within your human ability to give her a healthy and happy earthly journey. Your beloved Ginger is not wondering why you didn't help her sooner. Instead, she is eternally grateful to you for your eternal love for her. She does not want you shackled in deep grief and all the emotions that accompany this journey, for this will rob you of the joy of your cherished memories and the blessing of your Ginger's sweet Living Spirit in your heart. She will always be with you, Cindy.
Cindy, unfortunately guilt is one of the many emotions everyone goes through to some extent in this grief journey, and it can be one of the hardest to reconcile. Some people think that if they allow themselves to smile again, to remember their beloved companions with a happy heart, that they will forget their companion. Some people think that not feeling guilty somehow dishonors their beloved companion. I assure you, Cindy, that your beloved Ginger's first and foremost desire is for you to cherish her earthly journey with you. And I promise you that you will NEVER forget your beloved Ginger no matter how much time you continue in your earthly journey. It is impossible for you to forget your Ginger, for she is forever a part of you - - she is forever a heartbeat close to you. I hope and pray that as your grief eases you will be able to smile when you think of your beloved Ginger, and feel the warmth of her sweet Living Spirit tenderly embraced in your heart.
Cindy, in this early stage of your grief journey there are going to be more rough days to endure with all the horror roller coaster emotions that accompany it. We are here for you, Cindy, so hold on tight to us - - I promise you we will not let go until you are ready.
Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers, Cindy, and please let us know how you're doing.
Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
Thank you for your kind words. I'm so sorry that you all have to be here. And I thank you for being here. It is helping a lot. I have had pets pass away before, but each time I felt or knew it was their time. This did not feel like that. I thought she would be with us for at least a few more years. I never realized how much she balanced our family until she was gone. She actually helped us "rescue" the little doggie we have now. (He was neglected by the people that had him previously. They left him in the back yard with no food or water for days, Ginger let us know he was there and she would try to remove a piece of the fence to bring him over to us. She and my oldest daughter were the actual "first responders" to his rescue.)
I am going to go post this in her eulogy I wrote. This weekend I feel I may be strong enough to look at pictures and create a memorial for her. Thank you for thoughts, prayers and help. I still feel guilt and extreme sadness and it is a roller coaster of numbness, horror and sadness. This will be our family's first weekend without her. I have been dreading it, so I pray.
I am going to go post this in her eulogy I wrote. This weekend I feel I may be strong enough to look at pictures and create a memorial for her. Thank you for thoughts, prayers and help. I still feel guilt and extreme sadness and it is a roller coaster of numbness, horror and sadness. This will be our family's first weekend without her. I have been dreading it, so I pray.
"This will be our family's first weekend without her. I have been dreading it, so I pray."
Hi, Cindy, thank you so very much for sharing with us how you're doing. For a very long time - - which seems like it will never end - - there will be moments of "firsts" that will feel like a sword piercing your heart with great sorrow - - the first hour, the first day, the first week, the first month, the first vacation, the first holiday, the first birthday, the first anniversary - - and on and on and on. I promise you, Cindy, that in time, this deep grief will ease, and hopefully as it does, you will be able to feel your beloved Ginger's sweet Living Spirit continuing to share every moment of every hour of every day just as she always has and always will. The difficulty - - the challenge - - the painful adjustment - - is to the "new reality" that your Ginger is not "physically" with you. It takes time - - lots of time - - one day at a time - - to make the transition in this new dimension of your continued journey with your beloved Ginger. I promise you, Cindy, she is still very much with you -- she is forever a heartbeat close to you.
I hope today is being kind to you, Cindy. I will look forward to knowing how your memorial to your beloved Ginger is going - - if you would like to share it with us. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.
Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
Hi, Cindy, thank you so very much for sharing with us how you're doing. For a very long time - - which seems like it will never end - - there will be moments of "firsts" that will feel like a sword piercing your heart with great sorrow - - the first hour, the first day, the first week, the first month, the first vacation, the first holiday, the first birthday, the first anniversary - - and on and on and on. I promise you, Cindy, that in time, this deep grief will ease, and hopefully as it does, you will be able to feel your beloved Ginger's sweet Living Spirit continuing to share every moment of every hour of every day just as she always has and always will. The difficulty - - the challenge - - the painful adjustment - - is to the "new reality" that your Ginger is not "physically" with you. It takes time - - lots of time - - one day at a time - - to make the transition in this new dimension of your continued journey with your beloved Ginger. I promise you, Cindy, she is still very much with you -- she is forever a heartbeat close to you.
I hope today is being kind to you, Cindy. I will look forward to knowing how your memorial to your beloved Ginger is going - - if you would like to share it with us. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and look forward to knowing how you're doing.
Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
Hello Cindy
Just stopping by to see how you are doing and let you know that you and Ginger are often in my thoughts. Your loss is so new and it takes a LONG time to become even halfway functional again. I lost my Gretta (the kindest chocolate lab who ever lived) on April 10 and I STILL have a hard time looking at pictures of her - although I do keep two out, in a little shrine, so I can see them all the time.
I'm sorry that you are in the Shot-in-the-Heart time - stunned,, knocked senseless by grief and sadness. Please, PLEASE do not blame yourself for not seeing Ginger's illness sooner, not doing more, and on and on. It's exactly as Moonbeam says - animals are geniuses at hiding the fact that they are 'ailing'. Not like people, who start moaning and groaning right away. By the time any symptoms show, it's usually WAY to late to actually cure the condition. And .... for some reason, whoever made this universe made the life spans of our fur babies so much shorter than ours .... so if we are those who love and are loved by one or more special soul-mate spirit-animals, we get to go through this more than once. We are NOT the ones who can make good on our grief-stricken resolve not to get another animal - or at least wait a few years. No. Our next soul-mate crosses our path so unexpectedly and our hearts will not let us turn away.
Just from your words, I can tell that your Ginger is one of those special spirit animals whose extraordinary souls bring love and life to this earth. And she's touching hearts all around the world through this site. "You go, Ginger-Bear!"
Peace and blessings to you,
Gretta's mom
Just stopping by to see how you are doing and let you know that you and Ginger are often in my thoughts. Your loss is so new and it takes a LONG time to become even halfway functional again. I lost my Gretta (the kindest chocolate lab who ever lived) on April 10 and I STILL have a hard time looking at pictures of her - although I do keep two out, in a little shrine, so I can see them all the time.
I'm sorry that you are in the Shot-in-the-Heart time - stunned,, knocked senseless by grief and sadness. Please, PLEASE do not blame yourself for not seeing Ginger's illness sooner, not doing more, and on and on. It's exactly as Moonbeam says - animals are geniuses at hiding the fact that they are 'ailing'. Not like people, who start moaning and groaning right away. By the time any symptoms show, it's usually WAY to late to actually cure the condition. And .... for some reason, whoever made this universe made the life spans of our fur babies so much shorter than ours .... so if we are those who love and are loved by one or more special soul-mate spirit-animals, we get to go through this more than once. We are NOT the ones who can make good on our grief-stricken resolve not to get another animal - or at least wait a few years. No. Our next soul-mate crosses our path so unexpectedly and our hearts will not let us turn away.
Just from your words, I can tell that your Ginger is one of those special spirit animals whose extraordinary souls bring love and life to this earth. And she's touching hearts all around the world through this site. "You go, Ginger-Bear!"
Peace and blessings to you,
Gretta's mom
Hi Cindy:
I hope you are feeling somewhat better since the passing of Ginger. My Put-Put left us on Saturday and prior to then, there was really no indication that he was even sick. He looked and acted like the same boy I'd known for 10 1/2 years. Please do not blame yourself. My Put-Put had a cancerous mass in his stomach the size of a grapefruit and no one knew until Saturday. I had been trying to find a place to assign the blame, but neither here nor there, my boy is now gone.
So, understand that I feel your pain and hope that you find some comfort in the fact that you are not alone and we are grieving with you.
I hope that, with time, you will find some comfort in knowing that your Ginger does not have to deal with pain and that she lives on in your memories and the countless good times that you two have shared.
I offer support and wish you solace during this time.
Put-Put's Mom
I hope you are feeling somewhat better since the passing of Ginger. My Put-Put left us on Saturday and prior to then, there was really no indication that he was even sick. He looked and acted like the same boy I'd known for 10 1/2 years. Please do not blame yourself. My Put-Put had a cancerous mass in his stomach the size of a grapefruit and no one knew until Saturday. I had been trying to find a place to assign the blame, but neither here nor there, my boy is now gone.
So, understand that I feel your pain and hope that you find some comfort in the fact that you are not alone and we are grieving with you.
I hope that, with time, you will find some comfort in knowing that your Ginger does not have to deal with pain and that she lives on in your memories and the countless good times that you two have shared.
I offer support and wish you solace during this time.
Put-Put's Mom
Cindy,
I feel your pain believe me. I am not aware of exactly how things went with you. I know for me, I blame myself. I am constantly struggling with the what ifs. There was nothing you could've done differently. My Jake, was really good at hiding his pain. Once it was obvious it became too late. I hope that today is a better day for you. I know it helps me to talk to other people going through the same thing.
Cass
I feel your pain believe me. I am not aware of exactly how things went with you. I know for me, I blame myself. I am constantly struggling with the what ifs. There was nothing you could've done differently. My Jake, was really good at hiding his pain. Once it was obvious it became too late. I hope that today is a better day for you. I know it helps me to talk to other people going through the same thing.
Cass
Just saw your post today and wanted to express my sympathies.....my dog's name was Ginger, too, and she was a German Shepherd mix. I'm sure our Gingers are romping together at the Bridge, making new friends. 
I know it is so hard to adjust to their physical presence not being there, it's been 2 weeks since my Ginger left us and I still expect to see her trotting into the room. It will just take time.
I do want to say, I'm so glad that you have 2 other dogs that can bring you comfort. Remember that they, too, are experiencing their own form of grief and going through their own adjustment and need lots of love and attention too.
I too found it hard to do any housecleaning because I felt like I was erasing Ginger's essence away. Any change, even just putting something away that had been sitting out when she was still alive, just drove home the fact that she was gone and life moves on, regardless. These are normal grief feelings. Knowing they're normal doesn't help the ache go away, I know.....but rest assured you are not alone in having them.
I know it is so hard to adjust to their physical presence not being there, it's been 2 weeks since my Ginger left us and I still expect to see her trotting into the room. It will just take time.
I do want to say, I'm so glad that you have 2 other dogs that can bring you comfort. Remember that they, too, are experiencing their own form of grief and going through their own adjustment and need lots of love and attention too.
I too found it hard to do any housecleaning because I felt like I was erasing Ginger's essence away. Any change, even just putting something away that had been sitting out when she was still alive, just drove home the fact that she was gone and life moves on, regardless. These are normal grief feelings. Knowing they're normal doesn't help the ache go away, I know.....but rest assured you are not alone in having them.
It has been 5 months and I still feel the pain. Thank you all, coming here and reading your kind words helps a lot. I read all your stories and pray for everyone here. Our animal friends are truly gifts and blessings into our lives. Thank you, all.
Hi, Cindy, thank you so much for sharing your and your beloved Ginger's 5-month angel-versary with us. Five months is about the time when the protective shock has worn off and we look back and realize that somehow we have "survived" all this time without our beloved companion's sweet precious physical presence with us. The "reality" of this opens a new level of grieving - - the continuation of the horror roller coaster ride of adjusting to the physical absence of our beloved companion. It is a very painful adjustment for sure, Cindy. Please let me try to reassure you that what you are feeling is very normal grief, and you are not alone in your journey.
I do hope that life is treating you kindly, cindy. Thank you again so very much for sharing with us how you're doing. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how things are going for you whenever possible.
Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
I do hope that life is treating you kindly, cindy. Thank you again so very much for sharing with us how you're doing. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and that I look forward to knowing how things are going for you whenever possible.
Peace and blessings,
moon_beam
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