I made a mistake about the cause of my sweet sweet angels illness. I believe I called it the Zoonotic in the first posting in August. The illness that caused his death was Leptospirosis. I would like share his pictures, and I will as soon can. I have made the mistake of becoming a workaholic to keep from facing how bad it has affected my life. And now it still feels like today or yesterday was that day. One month to the exact day is when I threw away the first thing that belonged to him. That was a prescription that kept falling out the fridge everytime we open it. I have read countless times on this website how not to many people understand the grief. Yes in the beginning people who live in my household and those close to me said they where sorry for my loss. But now when I cry (which is just about everyday), I get a look of confusion. So now I feel like I am where I need to be (here). My mind has never stopped racing trying to find a way to do something honorable in his name to help pets and their parents. Lots of ideas but no clue what to do with them. Next week I plan on calling the hotline to seek extra help to healing. Please read up on Leptospirosis and spread the word. Until next time thanks for your time and ears.

Dear Rudy'smom

I'm glad that you posted again. You are honouring your dear Rudy by spreading the word about the dreadful illness Leptospirosis to other pet mums and dads. That is a great tribute to him and you are very thoughtful and caring in doing so, when you are so grief stricken yourself. Rudy will be very proud of his 'Mom'.
I am glad to see that you will be getting some help and I do hope that your pain and heartache will gradually make way for happier thoughts and memories of your dear Fur Angel Rudy. It is still only a month, so give yourself time and take care of yourself.
I will look forward to seeing the pictures of Rudy when you can post them.
Thinking of you.
Hugs
Jan and my Angels and Pixie

Hi, Rudy's Mom, I would like to add my deepest appreciation to see you with us again. Don't worry about the confusion of your first posting - - when we are in deep grief we aren't always able to find the "right" words to describe what happened, causes, etc. In fact, I misspelled my Abbygayle's name for the topic because my eyes were so filled with tears I could hardly see what I was typing.

Rudy's Mom, you are among friends here who DO understand the grief journey that you are traveling. I'm sorry you aren't receiving the support you need from those who are physically closest to you, but unfortunately that is pretty normal. My elder siblings really don't understand how deeply affected I am with a loss either because they have a totally different philosophy about non-human lives. So, I'm the "wierdo" in the family. Coming to this website has helped me to find a peace about who I am, and I am thankful to God for blessing my life with the wonderful people here.

As Jan said, it has only been a month since your precious Rudy joined the angels, so please don't expect too much of yourself. Clinical studies are now accepting the reality that the grief journey for the loss of a beloved companion is the same as for the loss of a human family member or friend. During my volunteer work with hospice, the follow up with the bereaved family is a year - - to help the family through all the "firsts" that happen during the "first year" of adjusting to the physical absence of their human family member.

For us furkid guardians we have this wonderful forum where we can come to find the support and encouragement that we desperately need to help us through our grief journey because we too have all the "anniveraries" to face after our beloved companions join the angels - - the first birthday, the first holidays, the first vacation, the first day, the first week, the first month, - - the first lifetime of adjusting to not having the physical presence of our beloved companions.

So, Rudy's Mom, please know we are here for you for as long and as often as you need us. Come frequently to share with us how you're doing, and to share with us your memories of your precious Rudy. We will look forward to seeing your pictures whenever you are able to post them. And you will find a way to honor your precious Rudy - - you have already begun by sharing him with us on this forum. As the deep grief eases, you will be able to find other ways to honor him as well. Just take it one day at a time, Rudy's Mom.

Rudy's Mom, please know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and will look forward to knowing how you're doing.

Peace and blessings,
moon_beam

Thanks! I look forward to when the days are not so empty and painful.

Thank you for sharing your family experience with me. I know people have biased beliefs when it comes to this, but everyone in my home helped to look after him. Then I think well I am the one they call the animal lady. I have done my share of rescues to abandoned kittens, and finding them homes. I knew they did not understand why I did it. Bringing home Rudy was different we have always had animals that we all look after. Despite losing him we still have a cat, parrot, and two iguanas, but I feel guilty and yet I just can't nurture them yet. Especially my cat (my 1st rescue). Rudy use to chase him around the house. Now he runs as if he is being chased (this is new). I don't know whats that about. I try to give him attention but I lose interest very quick. This would be something my family could step in with, because we all notice he went from cat/dog(his nick name from growling at folks) to a much more sociable kitty (still a little ruff edged). I don't know. Thanks again for your time and ears. You have helped me dry my tears this morning.