Hi all,

My little Netherlands Dwarf Rabbit, King Henry, had to be put to sleep today; I had to bring him to the emergency vet cause his regular vet was taking a vacation day. I always dreaded this day, even when he was tiny, because I feel so in love with him so fast. He was the sweetest little dude, always licked your nose when you held him up to your face, always got excited when we filled the food bowl but instead of running to the food, he'd run up to your hand and wait to be petted.

I am in so much pain it feels like it's going to kill me. I can't believe I was holding him this morning and now I'll never see him again. He was 9 years old, and he got a pasteurella infection that we'd treated many times before, but this time it didn't respond to treatment and he ended up hopping around in circles and not eating. He lost weight -- he was barely over 2 lbs at his highest weight in his life but had dropped to 1.8 and I could feel his spine and his little ribs but even as an "old" man (I, of course, had been counting on him to live to be the Netherlands Dwarf max age of 15) he looked like a tiny baby bunny and I keep going back to the image of the catheter in his tiny, tiny arm and it tears up my heart.

I miss him so much. I want him back so badly. I don't want to live through this right now. I can't imagine ever getting over my tiny little bunny who I loved more than I'll ever be able to say.

Hi Bunnicula-

I am so, so sorry for your loss of King Henry. I never knew about Dwarf Rabbits before your post, but I do now. What a charming little creature he was! I can imagine that you are in terrible pain and shock.

Just let the grief course through you--you really can't do anything else anyway. It will take awhile before you feel like living again. Grieving is very complicated, but also, oh so simple. We want them back. Period!

Again, I am so sorry for the pain you are in.

Big hugs from Margi and Ladywolf

Thanks Margi, it's true, I just want him back so, so badly.

Hello Bunnicula,
So sorry to hear about the loss of your rabbit, King Henry, he sounds a real little charachter. Your ost brought back memories of my Netherland Dwarf bunny, lost him the same way 16 years ago, these small rabbits are very special babies, I can understand your loss.

Go with your grief and don't be afraid to talk and remember him.

***

I am so sorry that you are in so much pain. My dog Callaway died 8 months ago and I had never felt such grief even when my dad and sister died. I still miss Callaway so much but I finally can function again. You will get thru this although I know you don't think you will. Unfortunately, the only way to get thru it is to feel all of your emotions; cry, scream, pray whatever you need to do to help yourself get thru the pain. Talking about your pain is very important too. Talk to family and friends as much as you can and come on here as often as you need to, we all know how intense the pain is and we are here to help you cope.

If you feel up to it I would love to hear more about King Henry and see more pictures.

Rhapsedy

Hi,

So sorry to hear about your loss. I know exactly what you're going through. I lost my baby, a gorgeous lionhead lop rabbit, 11 days ago. She was only 5 years old. She died during aneasthetic prior to an operation. I've never felt pain in my whole life like I felt that day. It was raw, and powerful, and all-consuming. When we brought her little, lifeless body home, I let out an unearthly scream that I didn't think I was capable of, then literally callopsed onto the floor. The pain was so much more than emotional - it was real, physical hurt. I felt like my insides had been ripped out, leaving an empty gaping hole that will never be filled. The ache of missing her is almost unbearable. My life revolved around my everyday care and love for her. What do I do with that love now? I feel so lost, I really don't know what to do with myself.

But I know it feels like you will never stop crying. But you will find as the days pass that the tears get less. There's only so many tears a person can cry. And i'm not saying the pain will go - mine certainly hasn't - but it gets easier to deal with. It's almost like you get used to the pain being a normal everyday thing, which enables you to start functioning more normally. And when you think of your baby, you will soon find yourself smiling at the memories, instead of bursting into tears at the loss.

Hope you heal soon.

Hugs, cheryl (daisy's mum) xx

Hi Bunnicula. I'm so very sorry for the loss of your sweet King Henry. My heart goes out to you. I was all ready to write a reply to you until I read Cheryl's reply. I couldn't have put it any better than she did. The physical pain of losing your baby is so overwhelming. So, I won't repeat what she so correctly said, but I will add one thing - just breathe. That's all you need to focus on now. Just keep breathing in deep. We're all here with you. Please let us know how you're doing and post pictures if you can. I would love to see King Henry. Rabbits are such sweet precious creatures.
You're in my thoughts.
-Donna

You know, I don't know if I have a single picture of King Henry, except the one I took on my phone yesterday as I was taking him to the emergency vet. I knew it would be his last day I guess and so I took this picture, and when I look at it today I can see how wiped out he was. So it doesn't even feel like a picture of him, or it feels like a picture of just a piece of him... anyway, when I can upload it, I will. But I wish I had taken pictures now, I feel so regretful.

He was all white with the blackest eyes and ears that turned more and more black with each passing year. He had black "eyeliner" all around his eyes which made them look twice their actual size. Then he had a tiny black dot on his butt. He was approx. 2.5 lbs at his heaviest and he was the sweetest guy of all time.

Hi Bunnicula,

How are you feeling today? You will find that some days are worse than others. Sometimes you might feel strong, then a moment later you find yourself in floods of tears again, like you've taken three steps backwards. Don't let this fool you into thinking that you are not healing. It is a perfectly normal part of the healing process.

King Henry sounds gorgeous. My Daisy was white, with black floppy ears. She also had black around her nose and eyes, and just like your baby, she looked like she was wearing eyeliner. I used to love laying next to her, stroking her, and looking into those beautiful, soulfull eyes. They were so full of wisdom for a rabbit, as if she were an old soul that had been here before. I would give anything to look into those eyes again. I miss her so much.

Keep thinking about the good times you had. Such a strong bond like the one we all had with our babies can never die. They will always be with us in our thoughts, memories, and our hearts.

Here is a poem that has been a great comfort to me. It's by Constance Jenkins.

Weep not for me,
though I am gone, into the gentle night
grieve if you will
but not for long, upon my soul's sweet flight
i am at peace, my soul's at rest
there is no need for tears
for with your love, i was so blessed
for all those many years
there is no pain, i suffer not
the fear has all gone
put these things out of your thoughts
in your memory, i live on
remember not my fight for breath
remember not my strife
please do not dwell upon my death
but celebrate my life

Hang in there. Hugs, Cheryl xx

Dear Bunnicula,
I lost my dwarf mutt bunny-- last week. We were together for 7 years! I understand your pain. You had 9 wonderful years with your bunny, and we always expect them to live to the max, but we gain comfort knowing their lives were full and loving while they were with us. I'm sorry for your loss...but I'm glad our little ones stayed with us for as long as they did. <3 hugs. I know your King is snuggling up to you, watching over you.