I lost my 13yr old black lab, Brutus, a week ago today. I am having a very difficult time with it. I've had many animals throughout my life that range from dogs, cats, horses, goats, birds..you name it I've had it. But never have I had an animal like Brutus. We had a very special connection. I wrote a poem the past couple days and finished it yesterday on his birthday. I am not an artsy type person, but it felt good to write it. I am no literary genius, just your average person who misses her dog so much it's hard to breathe. Anyhow I hope you like it, I framed it and it is on his shelf with his urn, pictures, 2nd fav toy (his fav went with him), his collar, and a candle. I will try to add a picture later. God I miss him so much.

Brutus Midnight Gunsmoke
11-22-96 to 11-16-09



My Soul Dog Brutus

There will never be another like you,
My Soul Dog that is true.

We could read each others mind, you and I,
What an honor to have you by my side.

I wish you didn’t have to go away,
I wish you at my feet, where you would always lay.

There isn’t a time I don’t remember you there,
I miss you so much it’s hard to bear.

Almost thirteen years ago we started our family,
It’s been a wonderful, full-filling journey.

Remember camping and canoeing in the backwoods?
I wish that’s something again we still could do.

You brought me back when I got us lost up north,
And how about that time at Muskegon fort?

Remember in Grayling, we all got stranded in the dunes?
It’s just not fair you have to leave us so soon.

Charity Island we did explore,
I wish we had time to do so much more.

Remember the Great Lakes and the U.P.?
God we had fun and lots we did see.

How about all those times at Hardy Dam?
We spent lazy days fishing and then we swam.

I will always remember these times so dear,
In my heart you will always be near.

You were my shadow, my rock, and my best friend,
You were loyal and loving to the very end.

We had a connection, you and I,
I’m sure one again I will never find.

I will never forget you, my Soul Dog Brutus, my dear friend,
I try to remember it’s not really the end.

We will see each other again of that I’m sure,
When my time is done and I am no more.

“Brutus”, I will call and I know you will come,
Together we can begin the journeys never done.

Oh that is so lovely . Made me cry as I can so relate to what you are feeling, but 12 weeks on now for me.

I'm pleased that you have found this forum. I do hope it will help you to get through this dreadful time., as it has me.

Thinking of you.

Jan x

That was Beautiful. It touched me and also I see you must be from Michigan too or traveled here often. Brutus, is doing all those things in a place even more beautiful than our great state and he will bound full speed toward you when the day comes you meet again. Peace.

My Gosh, Sonya. You touched my soul. Beautiful! Such a touching, wonderful and loving tribute.

Many Blessings to you and your Soulmate Angel Fur Kid Brutus!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

Thanks Dottie, Jan and petsaresoulmates...I had a painting done of Brutus that I am going to post on here in a bit.

petsaresoulmates...yes, I live in Michigan...originally from PA. We've been in MI about 12 years and all those things I mentioned we really did do together and so much more. Have you ever been to any of those places?

Here it is, I actually had it done about 4 months ago...I took this pic with my phone so it may be small. Since I took this pic I had it framed and it is hanging above the couch in our weekend home. We hung it about a week before he went to the bridge. It is pretty big...18x24. I had a friend do it who I know through the miniature horse world. She did an awesome job.



I just ordered a memorial necklace with Brutus' name and dates on it...when it comes I will post a pic.

Also I am working on drawing the tattoo that I'm going to have done with his name and dates...I think I will put it on my foot but not sure yet.

I will have to find a bigger pic when I have more time and repost. Thanks for letting me share.

Sonya that is so beautiful, what a wonderfu tribute to your darling Brutus.
I've been reading your poem for him again too. It says it all. What great times you shared.
He will be so proud of his Mom.

Love Jan xx

Dearest Sonja,

I've been wishing to ask you for some time now, but feared your fragile state due to the tremendous sorrow, grief and guilt you express as I read daily of all you're sharing about yourself and your relationship with your precious Angel Soulmate ... Please forgive this question: Firstly, that is an absolutely awesome photo you posted of Angel Fur Kid Brutus and what your friend did with it. Okay, remember no pity is the word with me. Here goes: I am somewhat "visually challenged" even wearing three different prescriptions for eye gasses and ... I know there's something added in that photo other than the exact one I've seen you post, but the image is so tiny that I cannot tell what it is or if it's just my eyes. Do you happen to have the above photo in a larger size that you could post? I pray that my query hasn't upset you, however it certainly looks most beautifully unusual and exceptional yet my danged eyes cannot tell if it's only something that I'm seeing ...

Or rather not seeing ...

So, did you have the above photo ultimately enlarged and, if so, is it the one of which I'm already aware because it's one of his very first photos that I enhanced and posted back to you with the tribute video. Oh my, I hope my question made since as you know by now that I express myself far better using images, graphics, songs, poems and the like than when using the written word. Bless you for you patience, Dear One. Hugs!!!

And ... Oh! Oh! Oh! I would so very much love to see his memorial necklace and the tattoo you're designing. So, please don't forget to post those when you're feeling up to it. Okay? Sonya, we'd all love to see them. Tell Brutus's "Story" in words, photos and anything you have. Then someone with tell an other, and they'll tell and show others all about Brutus and it he'll live for all time!

As is sung in the song "Remember Me" by Josh Groban ...

"Remember"

Remember, I will still be here
As long as you hold me, in your memory.

Remember, when your dreams have ended
Time can be transcended!
Just remember me.

I am the one Star that keeps burning, so brightly.
It is the last light, to fade into the Rising Sun.

*I'm with you
Whenever you tell, my story
For I am all I've done!*

Remember, I will still be here
As long as you hold me, in your memory
Remember me

I am the one voice in the cold wind, that whispers,
And if you listen, you'll hear me call across the Sky.

As long as I still can reach out, and touch you
Then I will never die!

Remember, I'll never leave you ...
If you will only ...
Remember me.

Remember me...

Remember, I will still be here ...
As long as you hold me ...
In your memory.

Remember, when your dreams have ended ...
Time can be transcended!
I LIve forever!
Remember me ...

Remember me.
Remember ... me ...

Hang on, Sonya. Please, permit me to also fetch the video so that you can see what I mean as is clearly seen in Josh's face and body language while he sings. One picture is truly worth a million words. BRB >>>> Found it. Caution! "Tissue alert." You see, THIS is how I perpetuate Alex in hopes that he'll be remembered for all time ... The humorous, amazing, cute, loving, sweetness, his brilliance and so on about Alex ... By telling "his story" anywhere and everywhere to anyone who will look and listen .... And I always cry when I see this video so please have some tissues ready before you click to view and hear. Okay? More Hugs!!! And, here it is ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qPNY8NaVPBE

Sweet Sonja, your most cherished Immortal Beloved Soulmate Brutus can be Remembered and kept Alive for all time! I just now made this image. That's you speaking to everyone, showing everyone about Fur Kid Angel Brutus's story and I put that one (actually 7 on top of each other) star(s) who is Brutus burning so brightly for all to see. Please, keep telling and showing "his story" and I assure you that he will never die and shall be Alive and Remembered for all Eternity!



Gotta go. Can you guess why? I'll bet you can.

Love ya and Angel Fur Kid Brutus so much!!!

Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

oh Dottie...I love the image you made...I saved it on my computer. Can't watch the video (dialup) but will be sure to when I get home to highspeed.

I wasn't sure if you were referring to needing a bigger picture of the painting or the original picture (the one the lady used to paint from) so both are below. The actual small picture I posted in the above post was from my cell phone and I can't make that picture bigger..at least I don't know how to...so here is what I have below. I had to take the picture of the painting from an angle because the flash was distorting it with the light from the windows. I will say, the painting is slightly different than the picture. She specializes in animals and backrounds are difficult for her so it's not exact...the rocks/branches are slightly different, she had a hard time with the backround which she admitted, but I still think she did an awesome job, she captured the "eyes"...the soul to the heart. Also, she thought the white around Brutus' face was all grey's when alot was actually from the sunlight and from him being wet, so in the painting she made him more grey than what he actually was...but standing back from the painting it looks like sunlight shineing on his face, just like the photo. I was going to try to have some of the white removed but decided against that since from a distance it looks just like the real thing...it's just close up that it looks like to much grey on his face.

This is the actual photo:


And a photo of the painting just taken a few minutes ago:


Please tell me what you see/or didn't see...or what you even thought you saw/didn't see, even if it's something small, please tell me....I will of course be waiting...so hurry it up..lol..

Thanks again so much for the image. I will post the necklace as soon as I get it...got an email today that it was shipped so should have it in a few days. Still working on the tattoo...you all will be the first to see it.

How is Styx Kitty doing by the way?

Looking at the actaul photo...gosh, he is so beautiful...just look at those eyes...I miss him so much...what I wouldn't give to have him here again...just once even.

I love you pooh-man...so much..

Oh That is so beautiful.

Sonya I hope that has comforted you as it has me. I'm sure it has. Dottie thanks once again for Knowing how to make us realise that our darlings are with us and looking after us .

Love Jan x

Thankyou so much Dottie...I love it.

You're very welcome, Sonya. And, I'm so pleased to see this was of comfort to you too, Jan. These holidays are oh so brutal without our beloved fur and feather kids. So many joyful memories that now serve only as hurtful reminders. Time. It will take time and do take all the time you need to grieve and express your feelings.

I hope and pray that the day will come soon when all of us will find comfort, happiness and solace when remembering all those wonderful things about our Fur and Feather Babies.

Many Comforting Hugs to you and all your Angel Fur Kids!!!



Always,
Dottie xoxoxox

What an amazing poem! I cried while I was reading it. It sounds like you have a lot of amazing memories with Brutus. What a lucky dog to have such a wonderful mom.

Thanks Rhapsedy...we did have so many adventures. When my husband read the poem for the first time he said...I can see us at all those places in my head..like photos. We only went on two vacations away from Brutus in 13 years..if Brutus couldn't go then I wouldn't. I couldn't stand to be away from him..even those two times I worried and called the petsitter twice a day. We always wanted to go on a cruise but I wouldn't have it..I would of not been able to get back to my Brutus if need be when I was hundreds of miles out to sea...We are going to take a cruise next year though and I hope Brutus will be watching and enjoying the sights through my eyes...he was so special.

Thanks again.

Hi Everyone...got my memorial necklace yesterday....it came just in time...I was sad and I needed it....I love it. This is not the chain it came on...it came on a skinnier chain that was a couple inches shorter. It is sterling silver and very reasonably priced.. On the back of the circle is Brutus' dob and dod. You can have whatevery you want inscribed on either side...I think it was limited to so many characters though...I opted for the very simple one. If you are interested in the website (they had other things too) please feel free to pm me...I don't know if it's ok to post the website on here or not.

Still working on the tattoo...not sure if I want angel wings on the pawprint or not...still thinking about it...you all will be the first to see it when I'm done...I want it to be very simple, so might even just go with his name and dates...ahh decisions...big decision though since it's going on my body permanetly. Anyhow below is the necklace.



also figured I'd add the pic of Brutus' shelf for those who haven't seen it..this pic was taken about four weeks ago, I've added to it a bit and am still working on a colliage (sp?) pic to put above it, I still haven't found a flower that I like better than the one that is on it. I wish I would of put up a bigger shelf, but my house is so small. The shelf sits in our bedroom above where his bed use to be...he now watches over Tanga's bed. When I lay in bed on my side, I can see everything, that is if there is alittle light in the room. I am in bed before hubby, it's his job to turn off the light...and Brutus' shelf is the last thing I see when I go to bed. I do take Brutus' Urn (box) with us when we go to our weekend house. It just comforts me to know that I haven't left him behind...I will never leave him behind.








Hugs to all,
Brutus' Mom

The necklace is so lovely , it's a great idea. Haven't seen anything like that over here.I have a similar special shelf for my girls too. Got their toys out by the tree.
Will look forward to seeing the tattoo.
Love Jan xx

Sonya please PM me with the website. Your tribute to your Brutus is so pretty you can tell how special he is. I would love to get myself a necklace.

Take Care
Anna

Got my colliage done for above Brutus' shelf and added a lucky bamboo plant...which I'm sure will not live as I do not have a green thumb at all. Also added a couple poem cards in front of his box. I do take his box with us when we go up to the weekend house, but I don't have the set up I have here. I have another one of his bears on my dresser up there in the corner with a pic of him and some candles...I put his box there with all that stuff...I have also framed the poem for up there too and it is hanging by my closet door with a pic of him above it in my bedroom. I didn't think I would want so many reminders of him...but I do...I need them.



In the collaige picture frame are 3 pics of Brutus and I and 3 pics of Brutus and Doug and then the one profile pic of Brutus in the center. I have very few pics of us all 3 together and the ones I do have just weren't good enough to hang. Going to work on my tattoo today...would like to have it done and applied within the next month.

Hugs to my pooh-man...go fish buddy!

The picutres you hung really complete your memorial to your Brutus looks so nice

Greatb job done
Anna

Thanks Anna. I think I'm going to get my tattoo next week...I'll be sure to post it.

Sonya
How beautiful , Growing up I had two lab crosses and Brutus reminds me of them. they both went grey around the snout. He looks like such a good loyal friend. I feel your longing and missing of your best friend. I can imagine the bond. Such a bond I have with my sixteen year old cat who has been like my little dog who would greet me at the door when I came home, flop down and wait for her pat! or she would scurry away and make me chase her. She is still with me but I don't know how much longer. I remember when I had my dogs and I couldn't imagine life without them. I was younger then and now I am faced with the same prospect which I knew would ultimately come. But it is never easy. Seeing your Brutus makes me think of my late dogs who were such loving life savers back then for me. I feel for you and wish you strength.
Barb

Thank you Barb for your kind words.

Sending prayers for you and your precious soul Kitty..I hope you have lots of more time with her.

Hugs,
Sonya

A wonderful friend named Paul made this for us:



It is granite, about 18" long and 9" high. I really love it. I don't plan on burying Brutus' ashes so I'm not quite sure what to do with it. I was thinking putting it outside and making a sitting area around it with some flowers/shrubs. It's to heavy to hang it on the wall, it's about an inch thick. Any other ideas anyone can give me would be appreciated.

I still haven't gotten that tattoo I want...don't know why I'm putting it off...maybe I'm not ready yet...tattoos don't scare me...I already have 4, so that's not the problem...don't know what I'm waiting for, but I guess when the time is right it will happen.

Hugs to all,
Brutus' Mom

GO FISH POOH-MAN!

Sonya,

I was just browsing through some old posts and came across this thread. The poem you wrote for your dear Brutus is beautiful, it brought tears to my eyes. And the shelf is so touching. And the necklace. And as for Brutus himself... there are no words. Such a handsome boy. I love the pic of Brutus and Doug where Brutus has his head on Doug's shoulder. Brutus looks like a real human giving such a loving hug. And he looks so proud. He's clearly a special dog, and always will be. I can't believe I've never seen this thread before, but I just had to comment on it. I also thought it would be a good idea to bring it back up, since you've been talking about your tattoo again lately

Thinking of you.

Cheryl x

Sonya
I think that is a wonderful Idea you have to make a little garden with flowers and a little bench I can almost picture
it in my head. A place that you can go and just sit and think about the good times that you shared with your Brutus
maybe even do a little pond with the sound of running water since he loved the water with some Fish in it. Your Brutus
would be looking down just smiling and maybe even have a little sign made up by the pond saying go fish my Angel. Just a suggestion
keep us posted on what you do decide. Hope all is well I will keep you posted in a few weeks on my progress. I have not posted
anything here as of yet.

Hugs
Anna

Thankyou so much Cheryl....I love that pic too.



Those are great ideas Anna. I did put his stone in a garden area with wood chips around it, with flowers around it. The sun shines on it and all the pieces in the granite sparkle like crazy. It is by the steps going up the back porch to our other house and we walk by it all the time.

Anna, did you ever get your plate? I did get mine and it's on my car. It looks really good with my white car. I just used the same pic as my avatar (it's my fav)....anyhow, here it is before I put it on my car, it is covered in bugs now though.



I hope everyone is having good memories of your furbabies today and always.

Sonya

I would like to thank everyone for your beautiful comments on my poem. I really did pour my heart and soul into it...the poem means the world to me...I have it framed and hung in both my houses. If anyone would like to use it or adjust it to their situation, feel free but please respect my soulmate by mentioning that the original poem was intended for Brutus. I am honored that someone would want to use the poem and I hope it comforts them.

Thanks,
Sonya

Sonya, I hope you don't mind me posting this to the top of the board again. It's such a wonderful tribute and helped me so much last year, to see that I was not alone in my grief, and not the only one to have been so lucky to have known that wonderful bond that we share with our fur babies.
Hugs Jan and my Angels and Pixie xx

My latest tribute to Brutus (also posted on death and dying support forum):

Today was a year, so hard to believe. I have thought about him every day...I laugh, I smile, and.... I still cry. Still miss him so much. You all know I was planning on a tattoo today, exactly a year....there was definately some hitches in that plan.

First...I spent the past few months (off and on) planning this tattoo...it was going to be 3 paw prints with fireworks and stars around them and his name (with blue and purple), possibly with dob and dod also (either on my wrist or my foot)....I kept messing with it and last night I just totally didn't like anything I had done (I did not want to go with something standard that all tattoo parlors do, it had to be something I designed). So at 10pm I started totally over...and I finished.

Next day (today, the day of my tat), parlor calls me at 10am to tell me the artist is sick and not in so they have to reschedule for Friday....no, no, no, no...IT HAS TO BE TODAY! They already had a rough sketch of what I wanted, which I totally changed anyway.

I called 9 tattoo parlors near me, 50 mile radius, (I like to go to ones I know so this is already not feeling good) and the last one I reached said he could do it tomorrow....I said, "you can't please squeeze me in today, today is special"...I told him about Brutus and he said, I have a black lab...can you be here by 3pm (it was around 2pm)...I said absolutely....I had no clue about this guys work, didn't have time to research him or the parlor....but it HAD TO BE TODAY.

....so I did it, and the artist was awesome and talked with me about Brutus and told me about his black lab, Renegade...I am so pleased. It is on the top of my left foot, fairly big since I am a size 10. I have 4 other tattoos and this by far was the most painful.....but so worth it.

Love you Brutus, you will be with me always...

This is just a couple hours old, so it's red, shiny and alittle swollen, but I love it and I'm so glad I had it done



I'm off to have a drink in the name of my very best friend....love you poohman!

2 years today...we all toasted to you last night...still miss you so much....my love for you hasn't faded.

Till we meet again...GO FISH!

Think of you every day Poohman

Last Friday was 3 years to the day when I lost a piece of my heart...today would of been your birthday...miss you daily and think of you constantly. Happy Birthday Poohman!

Dear Sonya

Your Brutus looks SO much like my Gretta, who left for the Perfect World almost two years ago. Even though Brutus is a black lab and Gretta is a chocolate lab, their faces look so much the same. Lab faces are miracles on this earth - kindness, gentleness, peace, dignity, warmth, ... well ... true love ... radiates from their beautiful eyes. We were blessed to have shared some of earthly lives with these gentle dogs. Brutus carries a piece of your heart and Gretta carries a piece of mine. One day we will be reunited in the big field in the sky.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours,

Gretta's mom

Yes, they do look alike...Labs do have the sweatest faces. I often thought of getting another but right now is not the time. I do have two other dogs that help fill the gap that Brutus left, one is a mix and one a rat terrier.

Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving Gretta's Mom...hugs to you.