Tonight I lost my best friend Tornado. We came home from the lake and he didn't meet us at the door. I instantly knew something was wrong with him. I stood in the living room while my husband ran through the house trying to find him. I couldn't move--i just knew. He found him in our son's room alive but very listless. We called 3 vets before we found one--why did this have to happen on a long weekend? It was a 1/2 hour drive away but we raced there with Tornado in my arms. He was barely moving. We got there and the vet said that he had a urinary blockage and that she would anesthetize him and undo the blockage. He would stay overnight and come home the next day. We drove home anxious but happy that by tomorrow we would have our precious cat back. Shortly after we got home the vet called--Tornado died in surgery. His bladder had ruptured. He was in our lives a short 11 years. The house seems so lonely. He is not around every corner. He is not following me around. He is not in my lap. He is not here. I will forever miss him. There will never be another Tornado. My heart is shattered. Thanks for listening.

I am so terribly sorry for your loss!

Tornado's Mom, I am so sorry for your loss! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I think I might know a little how you feel. We lost our beloved greyhound yesterday....suddenly and seemingly inexplicably.

Please know that you are not alone in your grief and keep writing, writing, and reading here. The members here are truly wonderful and supportive. They have given me immense support in a very short time and have helped me get more "right" than I could have on my own.

I will be thinking of you.

Tornado's mom I am so sorry for your loss, it happens when we least expect it.
That feeling in the pit of your stomach when you "just know" something is wrong is awful!!!!! I feel for you...you & your husband did the best thing for him. Oh that empty house syndrome is a shocker......take it a day @ a time or if you hve to a minute @ a time to get thru these nxt couple of days. 11ys may not seem long enough but you were blessed that whole time with Tornado & you might not hve realised it @ times.
Go gently.
Please come back & let us know how you get on & if you can by all means share with us what you are doing to remember him.
{{{HUGS}}}
elaine

Thank you all for your replies.
It was a very rough night last night. I thought I would be able to go to work today and pretend everything was OK but I had to call in sick. (and if you knew me you would understand that in the past 2 years I have never called in sick so you would know I'm not coping well) I always knew I would be upset if something happened to him but this is even worse than I could have ever imagined.
My kids are at the lake for the next 2 weeks with my parents. We haven't told them yet. We don't know if we should tell them tonight on the phone or if we should wait the 2 weeks and do it when we go to get them. My 10 year old is very sensitive and is going to be very upset. Please help us decide what to do and what to say. And thanks again for listening.

Im very sorry for your loss hun
I think it would be best to leave it till the kids come home to break the awful news to them .... its going to be hard enough for them to cope with the news when you are with them , without you there it would be harder for them I imagine
My heart truly goes out to you all

RIP sweet Tornado

best i can do is pray for you to make the decision that is right for your family.
elaine {{{HUGS}}}

I am having a really bad time with this. Small things throughout the day remind me he is not here. The pain is so raw but I feel like I'm supposed to act like I'm OK now. I'm so far from OK it's scary. But people don't want to hear that. They want to hear "I'm fine."
I dreamed of him last night. I dreamed that things had been different and he was alive.
We told the kids and they cried but are already asking for a new kitten and I actually feel anger towards that idea. How can they want to get a new kitten so soon? And then I realize Tornado was MY cat. We had a bond that no one can understand.
Yesterday at work was horrible. My co-workers are not animal lovers so I didn't even tell them. And then during coffee break one of them told me her son was putting his 2 cats (which he has had for about 8 years) to sleep because he doesn't want them anymore!! That almost did me in. I would do anything to have Tornado back and that guy does away with his cats because they are now an inconvenience????
Please tell me this pain will stop. Please tell me I'm not insane feeling this way. My emotions are all over the place--overwhelming sadness, anger, guilt. I feel like if I think about anything happy- like the trip our family is taking in January- that I am betraying Tornado.
I read this and I feel like I sound irrational. After all he was just a cat. But that's the thing. He wasn't just a cat. He meant more to me that most people in this world do.
Thanks for listening. Sometimes it just feels good to actually put my thoughts into writing.

dear tornado's mom, your are not insane. you are not being irrational. you are someone who deeply deeply loved tornado and now that hes gone, is going thru a painful grieving process. weve all been there. and everything youve said today, weve all felt. i remember that people didnt want to hear that i wasnt doing fine. but you want to know what i did? i didnt care! and i told everyone im not fine. im in pain. ive lost my cat of 14 years. and i was pretty blunt about it. i did get some looks and people left me alone. dont pretend if you dont feel it. who cares what people think. even now when people will walk in my office and i will be crying. they ask me are you ok? i respond what do you think? its only been five months. in actuality. maybe by not pretending, we can educate a few people about being more sensitive to those of us that love and value all life and not just human life.
your pain will end, gradually. i cant tell you how long it will take. its different for everyone but there will come a day when you will remember and speak of tornado with a big smile on your face instead of tears. i promise.
heres something you must remember: tornado was 100% all love. all animals are. they just want to be loved and in return what we receive is priceless: their love, their loyalty, they even take on our burdens. they become our shoulder to cry on. nothing can top that. so if tornado was 100% all love, dont you think he would want you to be happy again? thats all he wants for you. he is your angel now and will be with you forever and wherever you go, even on your family trip in january. and there will come a day when you will feel ready to have a new little one in your life. he or she will never ever replace tornado EVER! but he will help mend the broken heart. i just realized something. you know kids although they hurt too but i dont think can hurt as much as we do because we are the ones cleaning up after them, talking with them, cuddling with them. kids are happy to have pets, as long as mom takes care of them right? and thats why we as adults bond so much more with our furry ones. when i was little although i cried and cried when my pets left me, but i can tell you the pain didnt compare to when i lost my beloved riley and fred, cats that were mine when i finally moved out on my own, cats that i was solely responsible for. wow that pain was intense. i had never felt it that bad. so dont be angry. they dont understand the bond that you shared with tornado. one day when they are on their own and have their own pets, they will.
im glad that writing is making you feel better, please keep doing so. you are in my thoughts and prayers
patricia

All I can say is thank you for taking the time to respond. It helps to know there is someone out there who truly understands.
I am sorry for your losses as well and I hope I can be as strong as you.

we are here for you!!! and we all truly understand. thank you for you kind words but i will tell you the truth. im not strong either. when i read everyones stories including yours, i cry along with you. but i have come to learn thru this wonderful site that we can choose to go down into the depths or we can fight the drowning and survive. our lives will never be the same. it doesnt mean it wont be good because i can tell you that life with my new puppy lucy has brought smiles to my face that i thought were gone forever. its just different. you will make it. lean on us for support. we will hold you up.

hugs!!!
patricia