Full Version: Heartbroken & Lost
On Sunday, my Lhasa Apso jumped out of my truck and into the road. I called him attempted to alert the driver but he was hit by a pick up truck. I ran to him and held him. He died right in my arms. I was crynig, holding him in the middle of the road. This all happened in about 10 seconds. The bad thing is that I witnessed the entire event and I keep replaying it over and over again in my mind. A good samaritan stopped. I must have been in shock. She went to the emergency vet with me but it was too late. Simon was my best friend and I miss him so much. He was 2 years old and strong and handsome and everything. Everyone, (ie), the vet, the groomer, friends and strangers alike love him. And he loved everybody back. I start crying at unexpected times throughout the day. He was so full of life and joy. We went for 2 walks each day, and he appreciated it and always conveyed that to me with a smile. He woke me every morning at sunrise and when he saw me, his eyes and smile just kept saying thank you, thank you, thank you! He changed my life and I am devastaed without him around. I relied on him more than he relied on me. I am still hoping that the vet will call and say that he's OK. I miss him and feel sick. I just want to be stronger for him and somehow get through this. It was so unexpected and we were running and playing literally minutes before this happened. I'm trying to figure out how to get through this without completely falling apart.
Frank,
I am so, so sorry about your little buddy Simon. It is bad enough to lose a special one like Simon but it has got to be such a shock to be happy & playing one minute, and complete life changing tradegy the next.
These little guys become our entire world so when they are gone it is like the world has stopped but we are spinning in such grief that we don't know what to do. Or how we will go on without them. We do. We can. But it ain't easy!!
I've lost many pets in various ways over the years and none have been easy. My very first puppy that was my own when I left home was also hit by a car & I saw it. I was devistated too. But I am still here some _____ years later (don't want to age myself).
For whatever reason his life was cut short, he must have been sent to you for a reason. Remember what all he did for you, and you for him, in the time you had together and cherish those things. It will take time; maybe lots of time, but his memories will help heal your heart eventually.
All of us are here for you. Post as often as you need to. Add pictures for us to see your angel and know we all are willing to offer our support in any way we can.
Special thoughts of you & Simon tonight.
I am so, so sorry about your little buddy Simon. It is bad enough to lose a special one like Simon but it has got to be such a shock to be happy & playing one minute, and complete life changing tradegy the next.
These little guys become our entire world so when they are gone it is like the world has stopped but we are spinning in such grief that we don't know what to do. Or how we will go on without them. We do. We can. But it ain't easy!!
I've lost many pets in various ways over the years and none have been easy. My very first puppy that was my own when I left home was also hit by a car & I saw it. I was devistated too. But I am still here some _____ years later (don't want to age myself).
For whatever reason his life was cut short, he must have been sent to you for a reason. Remember what all he did for you, and you for him, in the time you had together and cherish those things. It will take time; maybe lots of time, but his memories will help heal your heart eventually.
All of us are here for you. Post as often as you need to. Add pictures for us to see your angel and know we all are willing to offer our support in any way we can.
Special thoughts of you & Simon tonight.
QUOTE (Flossie's Mom @ Jan 13 2009, 09:24 PM) 
Frank,
I am so, so sorry about your little buddy Simon. It is bad enough to lose a special one like Simon but it has got to be such a shock to be happy & playing one minute, and complete life changing tradegy the next.
These little guys become our entire world so when they are gone it is like the world has stopped but we are spinning in such grief that we don't know what to do. Or how we will go on without them. We do. We can. But it ain't easy!!
I've lost many pets in various ways over the years and none have been easy. My very first puppy that was my own when I left home was also hit by a car & I saw it. I was devistated too. But I am still here some _____ years later (don't want to age myself).
For whatever reason his life was cut short, he must have been sent to you for a reason. Remember what all he did for you, and you for him, in the time you had together and cherish those things. It will take time; maybe lots of time, but his memories will help heal your heart eventually.
All of us are here for you. Post as often as you need to. Add pictures for us to see your angel and know we all are willing to offer our support in any way we can.
Special thoughts of you & Simon tonight.
I am so, so sorry about your little buddy Simon. It is bad enough to lose a special one like Simon but it has got to be such a shock to be happy & playing one minute, and complete life changing tradegy the next.
These little guys become our entire world so when they are gone it is like the world has stopped but we are spinning in such grief that we don't know what to do. Or how we will go on without them. We do. We can. But it ain't easy!!
I've lost many pets in various ways over the years and none have been easy. My very first puppy that was my own when I left home was also hit by a car & I saw it. I was devistated too. But I am still here some _____ years later (don't want to age myself).
For whatever reason his life was cut short, he must have been sent to you for a reason. Remember what all he did for you, and you for him, in the time you had together and cherish those things. It will take time; maybe lots of time, but his memories will help heal your heart eventually.
All of us are here for you. Post as often as you need to. Add pictures for us to see your angel and know we all are willing to offer our support in any way we can.
Special thoughts of you & Simon tonight.
Frank, It breaks my heart to hear of your loss. Those visions are so vivid, especially when it is so sudden. But to have that total love and trust of another being, that is the memory that can get you through this time. I think it really helps to seek out sites like this. It's like group therapy without the psycholgist. No one gets tired of hearing of how much you miss your dog, or how lonely you feel. Sometimes you just have to be able to say it out loud!
If your dog could have spoken to in English, I am sure he would tell you eveything you already know abut him: that he was happy with you, that he enjoyed his life, and that he wanted to do anything to please you. He would also tell yout that his spirit still loves you, even after death.
I know you have a hard (sad) road ahead of you, but I hope your visit here helps, and that there will come a time when you can remember without tears.
Ditto to Flossie's mom, post a picture or two. Pets are more photogenic than people.
If your dog could have spoken to in English, I am sure he would tell you eveything you already know abut him: that he was happy with you, that he enjoyed his life, and that he wanted to do anything to please you. He would also tell yout that his spirit still loves you, even after death.
I know you have a hard (sad) road ahead of you, but I hope your visit here helps, and that there will come a time when you can remember without tears.
Ditto to Flossie's mom, post a picture or two. Pets are more photogenic than people.
Hi Frank
I'm so sorry to hear about Simon. I know what you mean when you say you relied on him more than he relied on you. I was like this over my beautiful dog Jack who I lost 3 years ago. I dont think I realised it though until he died. He also died suddenly in an accident, there one minute, gone the next and I do think it makes it harder. Not to make light though of anyone here who has lost a dog at old age as both things are extremely painful. But when they die young and unexpectedly, the shock is terrible.
Its such early days and you can't expect to feel better yet. People kept saying to me "time will make it better, each day will get easier"
Well I will be honest with you, for me it got worse before it got better. When I look back I think I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, I just loved Jack so much.
Crying randomly during the day is normal, its only just happened. this went on for weeks and weeks for me. But what I can tell you is that eventually you do cry less and eventually you will be able to replace those awful images with happy memories that you had with him.
I didn't see my dog die. We went to work and then there was a knock on the door at work. It was my husband to say Jack had been in the garden at my mum's and got spooked by something and ran to the house, not realising the patio door was closed. He ran into it and died. Even though I didn't see it happen, I still replayed the image of it happening and I continuously replayed the image of my husband saying "Jack's been in an accident, he's dead"
My husband said for weeks he replayed the image of my dad calling him and saying Jack was dead.
I think its kind of like post traumatic shock in a way.
Like you, I kept hoping the vet would call and say he just knocked himself unconscious and wasn't gone afterall.
For now, you are going to feel the way you feel. All I can say is take one day at a time and don't have high expectations of yourself. Like you said, he was your best friend. If you were talking about a human, everyone would expect you to be in mourning for a very long time. Well, for dog lovers, its the same when our dog/best friend dies. they love us so unconditionally, theres nothing else like it.
I always say to people going through this (something I learned very quickly), talk to people who understand your loss and avoid those who don't for now.
keep coming here if it helps. We all understand and have some idea how you feel.
take care.
I'm so sorry to hear about Simon. I know what you mean when you say you relied on him more than he relied on you. I was like this over my beautiful dog Jack who I lost 3 years ago. I dont think I realised it though until he died. He also died suddenly in an accident, there one minute, gone the next and I do think it makes it harder. Not to make light though of anyone here who has lost a dog at old age as both things are extremely painful. But when they die young and unexpectedly, the shock is terrible.
Its such early days and you can't expect to feel better yet. People kept saying to me "time will make it better, each day will get easier"
Well I will be honest with you, for me it got worse before it got better. When I look back I think I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, I just loved Jack so much.
Crying randomly during the day is normal, its only just happened. this went on for weeks and weeks for me. But what I can tell you is that eventually you do cry less and eventually you will be able to replace those awful images with happy memories that you had with him.
I didn't see my dog die. We went to work and then there was a knock on the door at work. It was my husband to say Jack had been in the garden at my mum's and got spooked by something and ran to the house, not realising the patio door was closed. He ran into it and died. Even though I didn't see it happen, I still replayed the image of it happening and I continuously replayed the image of my husband saying "Jack's been in an accident, he's dead"
My husband said for weeks he replayed the image of my dad calling him and saying Jack was dead.
I think its kind of like post traumatic shock in a way.
Like you, I kept hoping the vet would call and say he just knocked himself unconscious and wasn't gone afterall.
For now, you are going to feel the way you feel. All I can say is take one day at a time and don't have high expectations of yourself. Like you said, he was your best friend. If you were talking about a human, everyone would expect you to be in mourning for a very long time. Well, for dog lovers, its the same when our dog/best friend dies. they love us so unconditionally, theres nothing else like it.
I always say to people going through this (something I learned very quickly), talk to people who understand your loss and avoid those who don't for now.
keep coming here if it helps. We all understand and have some idea how you feel.
take care.
I am so sorry about Simon. Many people here have said very true and helpful things So you have a lot of good thoughts and advice here.
That he was only 2 years old and everything was so sudden...it's like being "blindsided". I know my boy Little Guy was an ER decision that I was not prepared for and there is something about suddenness that just puts us in shock, I think. You mention hoping the vet would call and say he will be okay. Reminds me of when I came back to my empty home...I did spend a few days calling my boy, hoping he would come strolling out from the back bedroom where he liked to sit
and look out the window...but in the back of my mind...I knew that would never happen again..because physically he is gone.
you wondered: I'm trying to figure out how to get through this without completely falling apart.
I don't have that answer as I felt I fell apart. Days of crying and the ache and pain inside that just doesn't lessen. The worst part seemed to be the emptiness his being gone left everywhere. He was a part of our home and our life as you felt Simon was for you.
Once upon a time I had 2 dogs, one age 3 and one a puppy. I had to put down the 3 year old and it was a lifesaver for me to have that puppy demanding all my attention when I came home.
When I lost my cat, Little Guy, there was no special friend left and that emptiness was very hard to bear. After I cried so many days and go through all the Holidays in 2007, I was so tired of being exhausted by grief, I started to ask myself...what do I want? I knew I couldn't have my boy back. I knew I missed hugging him, talking to him, playing with him, and his responding. I decided I wanted another in my home and so I started going to the SPCA and the local adoption shows, looking to find one that reminded me of my boy but knowing it would take looking into a pair of eyes that made me feel I wanted to look into those eyes everyday. After searching for a couple of weeks, I did find a boy and I named him Lucky. He is not my boy and we can never replace the ones we lost, but he helps me with his demand for attention. I still miss my boy and can still cry but I have him as my desktop wallpaper so every-time my computer gets turned on...I look into my boy's eyes and I say goodnight when I turn it off. His being on my desktop makes me feel he is in a place where he can never leave me again.
I put his pictures in all my rooms so I can see him and keep him as part of my everyday life as he is always there when I walk into a room. I don't think we can ever let them go..because they are so much a part of us and our heart.....they just can't go away.
So it is okay to cry. It is okay to do whatever makes you feel better. I know the pain is overwhelming and even when time starts to lessen it, sometimes it just comes back and hits you over the head with its intensity...just when you feel in control again. But then, when that happens, relax and cry and vent, and you will wind up back in control again.
There are two thoughts I have read in forums that have helped me and also others:
1. The pain of losing him will never ever be bigger than the joy of knowing him.
2. One can ask with the depth of pain we go through WHY do we allow ourselves to become so attached to pets? All one has to do is think of the tremendous amount of unconditional love we get from them and then we can ask WHY WOULDN'T WE?
Again, I am so very sorry about what happened. Come back here anytime and talk about your thoughts and feelings. Maybe even post a picture of Simon if you feel like it. This is a good place to vent.....to let go. Your grief is understood and here you are never alone. We all know and share the pain..and if anything that has helped us start to heal...helps you...that adds to us all healing.
Hugs to you and a special hug to your boy, Simon. He is an Angel who will now watch over you 24/7. He was too young. It should not have been his time. But then we know life is never fair.
But we are always grateful they were in our lives for the time allowed. We would never trade those times to avoid the pain that will come when it is their time to go. He is and always will be a part of your heart and so he is where he can never truly leave you. We love them forever and miss them forever and it is the missing that causes the heartbreaking pain but they are worth everything to us.
Take care.
Judy
That he was only 2 years old and everything was so sudden...it's like being "blindsided". I know my boy Little Guy was an ER decision that I was not prepared for and there is something about suddenness that just puts us in shock, I think. You mention hoping the vet would call and say he will be okay. Reminds me of when I came back to my empty home...I did spend a few days calling my boy, hoping he would come strolling out from the back bedroom where he liked to sit
and look out the window...but in the back of my mind...I knew that would never happen again..because physically he is gone.
you wondered: I'm trying to figure out how to get through this without completely falling apart.
I don't have that answer as I felt I fell apart. Days of crying and the ache and pain inside that just doesn't lessen. The worst part seemed to be the emptiness his being gone left everywhere. He was a part of our home and our life as you felt Simon was for you.
Once upon a time I had 2 dogs, one age 3 and one a puppy. I had to put down the 3 year old and it was a lifesaver for me to have that puppy demanding all my attention when I came home.
When I lost my cat, Little Guy, there was no special friend left and that emptiness was very hard to bear. After I cried so many days and go through all the Holidays in 2007, I was so tired of being exhausted by grief, I started to ask myself...what do I want? I knew I couldn't have my boy back. I knew I missed hugging him, talking to him, playing with him, and his responding. I decided I wanted another in my home and so I started going to the SPCA and the local adoption shows, looking to find one that reminded me of my boy but knowing it would take looking into a pair of eyes that made me feel I wanted to look into those eyes everyday. After searching for a couple of weeks, I did find a boy and I named him Lucky. He is not my boy and we can never replace the ones we lost, but he helps me with his demand for attention. I still miss my boy and can still cry but I have him as my desktop wallpaper so every-time my computer gets turned on...I look into my boy's eyes and I say goodnight when I turn it off. His being on my desktop makes me feel he is in a place where he can never leave me again.
I put his pictures in all my rooms so I can see him and keep him as part of my everyday life as he is always there when I walk into a room. I don't think we can ever let them go..because they are so much a part of us and our heart.....they just can't go away.
So it is okay to cry. It is okay to do whatever makes you feel better. I know the pain is overwhelming and even when time starts to lessen it, sometimes it just comes back and hits you over the head with its intensity...just when you feel in control again. But then, when that happens, relax and cry and vent, and you will wind up back in control again.
There are two thoughts I have read in forums that have helped me and also others:
1. The pain of losing him will never ever be bigger than the joy of knowing him.
2. One can ask with the depth of pain we go through WHY do we allow ourselves to become so attached to pets? All one has to do is think of the tremendous amount of unconditional love we get from them and then we can ask WHY WOULDN'T WE?
Again, I am so very sorry about what happened. Come back here anytime and talk about your thoughts and feelings. Maybe even post a picture of Simon if you feel like it. This is a good place to vent.....to let go. Your grief is understood and here you are never alone. We all know and share the pain..and if anything that has helped us start to heal...helps you...that adds to us all healing.
Hugs to you and a special hug to your boy, Simon. He is an Angel who will now watch over you 24/7. He was too young. It should not have been his time. But then we know life is never fair.
But we are always grateful they were in our lives for the time allowed. We would never trade those times to avoid the pain that will come when it is their time to go. He is and always will be a part of your heart and so he is where he can never truly leave you. We love them forever and miss them forever and it is the missing that causes the heartbreaking pain but they are worth everything to us.
Take care.
Judy
QUOTE (von72 @ Jan 14 2009, 12:36 PM)
But what I can tell you is that eventually you do cry less and eventually you will be able to replace those awful images with happy memories that you had with him.
I am so sorry to hear that such a tragic accident took the life of your presious Simon. When one we love so much is suddenly snatched away by death with no warning, that sudden blow just turns our world upside down wondering what the heck happened. Nothing quite makes any sense at all.
It took me a very long time before I was able to think less about the last moments of my Goliath's life. I can only echo what Von has said, and for me it was so true. Only time accompanied with visiting LS frequently helped my pain and grief to subside enough to become able to let the gift of happy memories come to the surface. This journey of healing has been one of the toughest challenges of my entire life. It's had its up and downs and I've taken many side trips along the way. Here at LS you will find hope and inspiration of finding your way back to another way of living happily. It will never be the same as when Simon was with you, but then how could it? The memories you and Simon made together are his gift to you, to cherish forever and a day. Trust that one day you and he will reunite.....never to be separated again.
Many hugs of comfort and love,
Beth
Thank you to eveyone who has helped me with this tragedy. It's been exactly one week since we lost our buddy Simon. I drove by the location today to say hello to him. It was extremely difficult, but I took a deep breath and proceeded. It was even snowing, as it was last Sunday. I miss him terribly but I am trying to be strong. I see all of the places that we used to go for walks and it is painful but I try to face it head on. Simon was very confident and strong willed, so I have taken a lesson from his. I just wish that I couid hold him and hug him one more time. Thanks again. I did not know about this forum prior to last Sunday, but is is a tremendous resource and I will continue to utilize it and share what I have learned and experienced.
Frank.
Frank.
Glad you came back, Frank. I know this is so hard at this time. We will always miss our best friend. That's what they are, aren't they? Happening so sudden makes the grief worse.
You just have to take one day at a time....what we call baby steps...toward healing.
We just can never stop the pain. It has to lessen over time. It is when our friends are taken away that we wonder how life can be so cruel....it gives us our friends only to take them away and that is something we know when we take them into our lives and we just hope we are given a good amount of time with them. When the time is short, as with Simon, we cannot understand why.
But in time we have to accept that it happened and try to heal ourselves with the good memories.
You are not alone. So many here feel your pain. It is a pain we share. It is one we know will not leave easily. We have to fight it everyday in the beginning. It is the missing that causes the most intense pain and the helplessness of not being able to change anything makes it worse. That's what we in time replace with our good memories.
You can see my dogs in Tributes under the topic "A Dog's Prayer". I cried so much when I lost them but no matter how I felt or what happened...for me I got another cause I needed to hug a friend again and I knew that friend needed to be hugged and needed a home. It is so depressing not being able to hug.
Time will help in its own way.
Take care, and hugs for you and Simon. He will always be with you because he is in your heart and a part of it.
Judy
You just have to take one day at a time....what we call baby steps...toward healing.
We just can never stop the pain. It has to lessen over time. It is when our friends are taken away that we wonder how life can be so cruel....it gives us our friends only to take them away and that is something we know when we take them into our lives and we just hope we are given a good amount of time with them. When the time is short, as with Simon, we cannot understand why.
But in time we have to accept that it happened and try to heal ourselves with the good memories.
You are not alone. So many here feel your pain. It is a pain we share. It is one we know will not leave easily. We have to fight it everyday in the beginning. It is the missing that causes the most intense pain and the helplessness of not being able to change anything makes it worse. That's what we in time replace with our good memories.
You can see my dogs in Tributes under the topic "A Dog's Prayer". I cried so much when I lost them but no matter how I felt or what happened...for me I got another cause I needed to hug a friend again and I knew that friend needed to be hugged and needed a home. It is so depressing not being able to hug.
Time will help in its own way.
Take care, and hugs for you and Simon. He will always be with you because he is in your heart and a part of it.
Judy
Hey Frank--------We all ache for you friend.You are in the right place.All of us will be here for you for as long as you need and the understanding you will receive here is unmatched.If I may suggest,please google: 'The rainbow bridge' as it will set you on the long path to recovery.God bless beautiful baby boy Simon.I would guess my boy Willy was on the greeting commitee when Simon showed up at orientation on the Bridge.They are waiting patiently for us you know.Your forum pal,
Bubba..........
P.S. He is in the early transition stage and he will probably give you a visit or some other sign that he is ok.Be 'open' to it....................
Bubba..........
P.S. He is in the early transition stage and he will probably give you a visit or some other sign that he is ok.Be 'open' to it....................
I'm so sorry you lost your Simon in such a quick and tragic way. You said it best with how you relied on him. My whole world evovled around my cat Arthur. He controled me.(and he knew it). I lost him quickly to an injuy. I had 24 hrs to "think" about it; but my heart wouldn't have it. It's so very hard. I've been hear 7mo now, cuz I still cry everyday. He was only 2 too. Funny how much of an impact they can have on us in such a short time. Yet time is all we have to move forward, greive, accept, etc.
It's a rough road, but it does in some ways end or at least gets less bumpy. You will find that love again someday. For now we are here for you. You are not alone, we all understand your pain and feel it with you. Wishing your tears turns to smiles soon. Like you said, you have to face the places you've been together, and that's hard to do, but I know what you mean. There isn't a spot in the yard that I don't see my baby, happy, enjoying life. Someday(soon I hope) it will make me smile to remember.
Perhaps you could place a stones with his name on it in the places he loved to go, in time if it's too painful now. Simon will always be your angel walking beside you forever...Many hugs..Ann
It's a rough road, but it does in some ways end or at least gets less bumpy. You will find that love again someday. For now we are here for you. You are not alone, we all understand your pain and feel it with you. Wishing your tears turns to smiles soon. Like you said, you have to face the places you've been together, and that's hard to do, but I know what you mean. There isn't a spot in the yard that I don't see my baby, happy, enjoying life. Someday(soon I hope) it will make me smile to remember.
Perhaps you could place a stones with his name on it in the places he loved to go, in time if it's too painful now. Simon will always be your angel walking beside you forever...Many hugs..Ann
I am so sorry for you loss of Simon. Those sudden losses are very hard to take. I'm glad you were able to drive to the place it happened to say "hello" to him. Talking to them does help. The days and weeks following your loss will be very hard, so cry all you want and take care of yourself. I think the days after my Ren, Zorro, and Nemo passed were kind of a blur... like going through life not really knowing what was happening. You and Simon had great love for each other, so take comfort in that and knowing that Simon felt so lucky to be so loved.
Ren, Zorro, and Nemo's Mom
Ren, Zorro, and Nemo's Mom
I'm so sorry about your loss. What a tragic thing to happen to Simon. I just lost my best friend, Jason, five days ago also in a tragic way so I feel you pain. Just know you are not alone in your grief.
Frank, I am really sorry to hear that you lost your pal Simon. He sounded like a great dog/friend to you. I know losing him in such a tragic manner, has been painful for you. From your posts, it sounds as though you are a strong person. I hope that the happy memories of Simon, will help you through the grieving process. I wish you comfort and peace, during this difficult time.
Thank you to everyone. Here's a picture of Simon, (black dog) in his seat, and that's his brother Jake in the front seat. On Sunday, it will be 2 weeks. I seem to be getting better each day. But I know that I will never be the same and I miss him so much. His nickname was Rocket Dog because he would run and play with incredible speed and agility. I received his paw print in the mail yesterday from the vet and I have not opened the envelope yet. I did think that I'm ready yet. I don't have to tell you how bad the last 2 weeks have been, but your help has been great and much appreciated
Thank you.
Thank you.
What a handsome guy..........
Looks like he loves to ride too................
Maybe he & my Flossie & Dayna's Mack are having a blast together. A couple of good looking guys for Floss to ride around with would be wonderful.
12 weeks for me now and I am doing some better. But 17-1/2 years of a best friend take some getting used to being without.
Thanks for the picture and update on how you're doing.
Ginger
Looks like he loves to ride too................
Maybe he & my Flossie & Dayna's Mack are having a blast together. A couple of good looking guys for Floss to ride around with would be wonderful.
12 weeks for me now and I am doing some better. But 17-1/2 years of a best friend take some getting used to being without.
Thanks for the picture and update on how you're doing.
Ginger
I hope that your days are getting a little easier to handle. With all those memories that creep up unexpectedly, life can really be hard to handle. That photo is great! Makes me wonder, do they let YOU drive?
I also yearn for that soft fur to stroke. and the affectionate response from my cat. Stroking the paw print just does not help. However, I found that there are a few other things that are helping me, in addition to reading these entries.
I bought all the Gary Larson "The Far Side" editions that were in our local bookstore. When I feel low at work or at home, I pick one up and they always make me chuckle. It feels good to laugh again.
I am working on a blog (with the help of my step-daughter), to post photos, of my cat and other things. It is a new experience, and writing narrative about each photo is very gratifying because it brings back good memories.
I don't watch Animal Cops anymore-it is too depressing.
My husband and I are walking more.
The point is that when you are able, do those things that give you a little pleasure, which does not lessen the love or loyalty you have for Simon. Perhaps you might silently, or not, talk to him throughout the day (which I do with Felix), and it is disappointing that he can't answer. Think of that film, "Oh, God", when George Burns says, "You talk, I'll listen." It has been said here before, as long as you keep the memory of him in your heart, he will never truly be gone. Take good care of yourself.
I also yearn for that soft fur to stroke. and the affectionate response from my cat. Stroking the paw print just does not help. However, I found that there are a few other things that are helping me, in addition to reading these entries.
I bought all the Gary Larson "The Far Side" editions that were in our local bookstore. When I feel low at work or at home, I pick one up and they always make me chuckle. It feels good to laugh again.
I am working on a blog (with the help of my step-daughter), to post photos, of my cat and other things. It is a new experience, and writing narrative about each photo is very gratifying because it brings back good memories.
I don't watch Animal Cops anymore-it is too depressing.
My husband and I are walking more.
The point is that when you are able, do those things that give you a little pleasure, which does not lessen the love or loyalty you have for Simon. Perhaps you might silently, or not, talk to him throughout the day (which I do with Felix), and it is disappointing that he can't answer. Think of that film, "Oh, God", when George Burns says, "You talk, I'll listen." It has been said here before, as long as you keep the memory of him in your heart, he will never truly be gone. Take good care of yourself.
Frank,
I'm not much for the whole " 5 stages of grief thing", I think it is simplistic and just a little too pat. But, here's a stage of grief I recognize:
Instead of an armed enemy that comes into your life with fire and sword to destroy, grief gets to be like that tedious relative, or acquaintance, you can't shake. It shows up at your work. It invites itself to dinner; you run into it at the mall. Sooner or later you learn to duck it...you know it's there...you know there will be times you can't avoid it, but you learn you can live with it.
I'm so sorry about your adorable Simon.
My tenderest sympathies,
Dayna
I'm not much for the whole " 5 stages of grief thing", I think it is simplistic and just a little too pat. But, here's a stage of grief I recognize:
Instead of an armed enemy that comes into your life with fire and sword to destroy, grief gets to be like that tedious relative, or acquaintance, you can't shake. It shows up at your work. It invites itself to dinner; you run into it at the mall. Sooner or later you learn to duck it...you know it's there...you know there will be times you can't avoid it, but you learn you can live with it.
I'm so sorry about your adorable Simon.
My tenderest sympathies,
Dayna
QUOTE
Instead of an armed enemy that comes into your life with fire and sword to destroy, grief gets to be like that tedious relative, or acquaintance, you can't shake. It shows up at your work. It invites itself to dinner; you run into it at the mall. Sooner or later you learn to duck it...you know it's there...you know there will be times you can't avoid it, but you learn you can live with it.
I don't know about you, Frank, but I think this was one of the most realistic and profound things I have seen here. It really seems to be the way it works.
I did not lose a friend the way you did, but my wife and I were at the vet's when a couple of guys came in with the exact same thing that happened to their dog...so we got to see that grief up close, and it was bad. You know, we always expect to have a long life with them and grow old with them, and to have something like that happen is kind of a sneak attack. There's no way to be ready for it. It will always hurt, but hopefully all the happy memories will show up sooner or later and start to dull the pain.
Frank, I'm so sorry about the loss of your Simon. I lost my Winston December 15th in almost the same way. I was taking him on his morning walk - we were happy and playing together. All of a sudden he jerked out into the street to get a piece of food he saw, and he slipped out of his collar and was instantly hit by a delivery truck - also, like your Simon, gone instantly. I still have nightmares of that image; it re-plays over and over again in my head. It's been over a month, and I find that it's getting harder not easier for me. Winston, like your Simon, was everything to me. He made me laugh, he cheered me up when I was sad - he was everything! After feeling crappy for days, I needed help - I found this site on my google search for how to cope with the loss of a pet. It has helped me alot knowing that others are feeling exactly what I'm feeling, that I'm not alone, and that I'm not crazy for crying daily over my Winnie.
I love that picture of Simon and Jake. I am glad you have Jake. I found it harder when I didn't have any other furbaby in my home after I lost one.
It hurts so very much and we all have felt that hurt. You are not alone ...the pain you feel...we all share with you. Kind of makes it all a little bit easier.
Write anytime you feel like it and tell us some stories about Simon that is a memory that makes you smile. Post more pictures if you feel like it...we all love to look at pictures...pictures are the good, happy memories that are priceless. We don't think about it when we take the picture but later on, we realize it was important to do.
It is only natural when one loses a best friend to feel so many emotions, it seems overwhelming but in time we learn to control the tears, the grief....and then some days out of the blue, we can be overwhelmed again...that's natural too.
I am so very deeply sorry about Simon but I am glad he was a part of your life..that you two were able to enjoy much together. We know that the pain of losing them is never greater than the joy of knowing them and it is that joy that lets us survive the physical loss in time. We, however, keep them in our hearts forever and miss them and love them for eternity and we hope we all are reunited one day in the place they call Heaven cause if they aren't there, it wouldn't be Heaven and as a member once said...if they aren't there...I want to go where they are. I echo that thought.
Hugs, Frank....it is okay to do whatever makes you feel better, whether it is to cry, to vent, etc.
There is no hurry to do things...time has a way of going by no matter what we are doing.
Take care...I wish you peace and healing and know that in time those wishes will come true.
Judy
It hurts so very much and we all have felt that hurt. You are not alone ...the pain you feel...we all share with you. Kind of makes it all a little bit easier.
Write anytime you feel like it and tell us some stories about Simon that is a memory that makes you smile. Post more pictures if you feel like it...we all love to look at pictures...pictures are the good, happy memories that are priceless. We don't think about it when we take the picture but later on, we realize it was important to do.
It is only natural when one loses a best friend to feel so many emotions, it seems overwhelming but in time we learn to control the tears, the grief....and then some days out of the blue, we can be overwhelmed again...that's natural too.
I am so very deeply sorry about Simon but I am glad he was a part of your life..that you two were able to enjoy much together. We know that the pain of losing them is never greater than the joy of knowing them and it is that joy that lets us survive the physical loss in time. We, however, keep them in our hearts forever and miss them and love them for eternity and we hope we all are reunited one day in the place they call Heaven cause if they aren't there, it wouldn't be Heaven and as a member once said...if they aren't there...I want to go where they are. I echo that thought.
Hugs, Frank....it is okay to do whatever makes you feel better, whether it is to cry, to vent, etc.
There is no hurry to do things...time has a way of going by no matter what we are doing.
Take care...I wish you peace and healing and know that in time those wishes will come true.
Judy
So sorry, Frank, about your Simon. These things always happen so unexpectedly and quickly, you don't have time to react. Sometimes you blame yourself. You wish you could go back in time. I also did not know of this website until a week ago when I lost a pet, the people here are very supportive. All I can suggest is, if your mind keeps trying to replay the accident, you're just torturing yourself needlessly. There was nothing you could have done, little guys like that move at the speed of light! Try instead to replace that image with an image of Simon running in a park, or coming to see you when you come home. He is cute, and looks like a real little character!
Hi, Frank
Just checking to see how you are doing.
Judy
Just checking to see how you are doing.
Judy
Thank you to everyone who has shown concern and helped me through this difficult experience. We take one day at a time, and realize that there's nothing to take the pain away. I learned that you just have to face it head on and get through it. I miss Simon very much each day, and now that the weather is getting nicer, I think about how much he would want to go out and run and play. I still hear his excited tone of voice coming from the back seat of the car each time I drive into the park we used to go to. I try to block it out of my mind because of the pain that the memories bring on. But I'm alright and I hope to get stronger as each day passes.
Everything is relative. There was an article in our local paper the other day. The circu.mstances described in the article are similar to what I went through, with a much more tragic ending. This easily could have been me. I thought that I had it bad until I read this article.
Thanks again.
Frank
Here's the article: Click here for a PDF file: MAN DIES TRYING TO SAVE BEST FRIEND.
Click to view attachment
Everything is relative. There was an article in our local paper the other day. The circu.mstances described in the article are similar to what I went through, with a much more tragic ending. This easily could have been me. I thought that I had it bad until I read this article.
Thanks again.
Frank
Here's the article: Click here for a PDF file: MAN DIES TRYING TO SAVE BEST FRIEND.
Click to view attachment
You are learning to heal..I can tell from what you say. That really was some story, wasn't it..and no one can explain to that dog what happened.
Yes, one day at a time....helps work for so many things in life.
I don't know if you want to block Simon's voice in the car....if....you can smile hearing it and saying to him things like...Boy, we sure had some great times, didn't we, buddy? Words conveying a good emotion because there were more good times than sad times. Dwelling on the good and thinking of them as good helps the healing process.
Sure, at times we still break down and become overwhelmed with grief..but we are thankful as those times are fewer than the memories that make us smile. We can't change fate but we can change the outlook fate forced upon us.....to a happy one thinking of our boys and reminding ourselves just how glad they were a part of our lives cause we now have those memories forever and no power can take those away.
Peace and healing...it comes with time..but we never ever forget these special best friends who taught us so much in our lives. And who will live in our hearts forever. We will love you forever and miss you forever but thank you, thank you, for entering our lives.
Hugs and healing..and a special Hug to your Angel, Simon.
Judy
Yes, one day at a time....helps work for so many things in life.
I don't know if you want to block Simon's voice in the car....if....you can smile hearing it and saying to him things like...Boy, we sure had some great times, didn't we, buddy? Words conveying a good emotion because there were more good times than sad times. Dwelling on the good and thinking of them as good helps the healing process.
Sure, at times we still break down and become overwhelmed with grief..but we are thankful as those times are fewer than the memories that make us smile. We can't change fate but we can change the outlook fate forced upon us.....to a happy one thinking of our boys and reminding ourselves just how glad they were a part of our lives cause we now have those memories forever and no power can take those away.
Peace and healing...it comes with time..but we never ever forget these special best friends who taught us so much in our lives. And who will live in our hearts forever. We will love you forever and miss you forever but thank you, thank you, for entering our lives.
Hugs and healing..and a special Hug to your Angel, Simon.
Judy
Dearest Frank;
I am so sorry of your loss. Simon seemed like he was special!
I can only say how sorry I am, as I am dealing with my own loos, and I hope my Jasper is playing with Simon right now as I write this to you! My big Ole' Rotti loved little dogs, he would try to "mother" them, yes you read that right, my male rotti, would try to mother little dogs, he was always so afraid something would happen to them; that he would try to herd them!
You have my deepest sympathies and if you need to talk I am here!
Lisa Consider yourself Hugged from me! And your Simon hugged from my Jasper!!!!!!!!!!! xoxo
I am so sorry of your loss. Simon seemed like he was special!
I can only say how sorry I am, as I am dealing with my own loos, and I hope my Jasper is playing with Simon right now as I write this to you! My big Ole' Rotti loved little dogs, he would try to "mother" them, yes you read that right, my male rotti, would try to mother little dogs, he was always so afraid something would happen to them; that he would try to herd them! You have my deepest sympathies and if you need to talk I am here!
Lisa Consider yourself Hugged from me! And your Simon hugged from my Jasper!!!!!!!!!!! xoxo
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