Full Version: My Duke Just Passed This Afternoon
HI everybody, I just had to put my Dog Duke to sleep this afternoon. Duke was an older Dog (about 12). Very large Shepherd/lab. I adopted him about 10 years ago from the local animal shelter. Duke had been slowing down for a while, but still quite active for an older dog. Today I had him out for a walk and his legs went all wobbly and he collapsed and couldnt get up. I took him to the Vet and after some tests they found out he had Cancer all through him. I had to have him put to sleep. Right now Im in Shock, this has happened so sudden I dont think I fully realize it yet.
Ive been putting Dukes stuff away(his bowl, bed, Toys, leashes etc so I dont have to look at them all the time. I just cant believe this, I had him out for a walk by the Beach yesterday and he even went for a little swim. Im just devastated right now. Please help Pals.......... David
David,
Sorry this has been so very sudden. But the decision you made was a gift to your Dog Duke. The great gift of letting him pass to the Rainbow Bridge with ease. No more pain or suffering. You let him go peaceful. Some people keep them hanging on just to satify themselves.
I know it is hard right now and telling you this won't seem to help any, but time will ease you pain. It is very fresh for you right now. Everyone here will listen and help you through this tuff healing process. Talking about it and telling us of your memories when you are ready may help you also.
Sending you and your angel Duke many hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Come back and post when you feel like it.
Sorry this has been so very sudden. But the decision you made was a gift to your Dog Duke. The great gift of letting him pass to the Rainbow Bridge with ease. No more pain or suffering. You let him go peaceful. Some people keep them hanging on just to satify themselves.
I know it is hard right now and telling you this won't seem to help any, but time will ease you pain. It is very fresh for you right now. Everyone here will listen and help you through this tuff healing process. Talking about it and telling us of your memories when you are ready may help you also.
Sending you and your angel Duke many hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Come back and post when you feel like it.
Hi David,
I'm so sorry to hear of Duke's passing. It sounded like you really had no idea that he was gravely ill until it just kind of happened. That must have been extremely difficult to deal with. I'm sure you are just walking around in kind of a fog, in disbelief of what just happened. Please know we are here for you, and feel free to type about anything you want, it has helped me some.
I had about a week's notice that my cat Fraffy was gravely ill. I put her down the day before Thanksgiving. I still am in disbelief.
I'm sending you many hugs David. It's a very very difficult thing to deal with.
Melanie
I'm so sorry to hear of Duke's passing. It sounded like you really had no idea that he was gravely ill until it just kind of happened. That must have been extremely difficult to deal with. I'm sure you are just walking around in kind of a fog, in disbelief of what just happened. Please know we are here for you, and feel free to type about anything you want, it has helped me some.
I had about a week's notice that my cat Fraffy was gravely ill. I put her down the day before Thanksgiving. I still am in disbelief.
I'm sending you many hugs David. It's a very very difficult thing to deal with.
Melanie
David,
I am so sorry to hear about your wonderful Duke. I know you must be in absolute shock to have him seem OK one day and then find how it had spread so thoroughly.
I took my Flossies blankets off my bed that she slept on the day I took her to put her to sleep before I took her just so I wouldn't have them there to look at when I went to bed that night. A few days later, I put her pink one that I carried her to the vet in back on the bed so she could come lay by me if she needed to visit. So I know how hard it is to see those things that remind us of them.
You know, I'm not sure what is the worst way for a pet to leave us. Suddenly or a long lingering illness? It is not an easy thing either way but watching them suffer with something like cancer is difficult at best. I watched a cat waste away, keeping her comfortable and trying anything to get food & water down her. I thought I'd know the right time to take her and she struggled to stay alive till I got home one night from work. She died a difficult death in my arms one block from the vet. I felt so guilty for waiting too long. I especially did not want her to suffer. I lost a dog that was with me outside planting flowers to another dog being walked on a leash but could not be controlled by his teenage walker. I tried to pry his jaws off my poor little dog but saw him go limp.
10 years is such a long time and I think the longer we have them we get to know what they like, don't like, how to tell what they want when they act a certain way. All the cute things they do, how they love us without reservation, are ALWAYS so happy to see us come home. Heck, I told my hubby that I had Flossie longer than some kids are with you and definately longer than many marriages last. There is just something about a pet that cannot really be explained I think.
I had a dog named Duke as a teenager. Australian Shepherd. I've always wanted another one like him. I've had German Shepherds too.... wonderful dogs. If I were rich and had lots of space I guess I'd have tons of dogs & cats..... Except I have a very hard time when I lose one.
Everyone here has some sort of loss so knows the pain you are feeling right now. Lots of people around us do not understand the connection between man/woman and his/her dog/cat.............. but all of us here do. I hope happy memories of your many years together will bring you some comfort in the days to come.
Post some pictures of Duke when you feel up to it. Ginger
I am so sorry to hear about your wonderful Duke. I know you must be in absolute shock to have him seem OK one day and then find how it had spread so thoroughly.
I took my Flossies blankets off my bed that she slept on the day I took her to put her to sleep before I took her just so I wouldn't have them there to look at when I went to bed that night. A few days later, I put her pink one that I carried her to the vet in back on the bed so she could come lay by me if she needed to visit. So I know how hard it is to see those things that remind us of them.
You know, I'm not sure what is the worst way for a pet to leave us. Suddenly or a long lingering illness? It is not an easy thing either way but watching them suffer with something like cancer is difficult at best. I watched a cat waste away, keeping her comfortable and trying anything to get food & water down her. I thought I'd know the right time to take her and she struggled to stay alive till I got home one night from work. She died a difficult death in my arms one block from the vet. I felt so guilty for waiting too long. I especially did not want her to suffer. I lost a dog that was with me outside planting flowers to another dog being walked on a leash but could not be controlled by his teenage walker. I tried to pry his jaws off my poor little dog but saw him go limp.
10 years is such a long time and I think the longer we have them we get to know what they like, don't like, how to tell what they want when they act a certain way. All the cute things they do, how they love us without reservation, are ALWAYS so happy to see us come home. Heck, I told my hubby that I had Flossie longer than some kids are with you and definately longer than many marriages last. There is just something about a pet that cannot really be explained I think.
I had a dog named Duke as a teenager. Australian Shepherd. I've always wanted another one like him. I've had German Shepherds too.... wonderful dogs. If I were rich and had lots of space I guess I'd have tons of dogs & cats..... Except I have a very hard time when I lose one.
Everyone here has some sort of loss so knows the pain you are feeling right now. Lots of people around us do not understand the connection between man/woman and his/her dog/cat.............. but all of us here do. I hope happy memories of your many years together will bring you some comfort in the days to come.
Post some pictures of Duke when you feel up to it. Ginger
QUOTE (Flossie's Mom @ Dec 5 2008, 11:10 PM) 
David,
Thanks everybody for your kind words. I dont what to say right now. Im a single guy and DUke was my Best Friend. In the whole 10 or more years I had him we only spent one night apart. Duke had been slowing down quite a bit over the last while but I had no idea he was so sick. Right now I cant think of anything except how much I miss him. At this point I guess I still am in Shock and disbelief.
Im just glad that Duke went quickly and didnt have to go through operations, all sorts of medications etc.. I got Duke originally from the Local SPCA. YOu never have seen a happier dog the Day I brought him home. I guess maybe some good can come from this as some very lucky Dog at the Shelter will be coming to very loving home. Some people say it may not be the right thing to get another dog right away after a loss, but in my case I believe it will help me. I'm sure Duke would not want me to be unhappy. Thanks so much everybody................. David
I am so sorry to hear about your wonderful Duke. I know you must be in absolute shock to have him seem OK one day and then find how it had spread so thoroughly.
I took my Flossies blankets off my bed that she slept on the day I took her to put her to sleep before I took her just so I wouldn't have them there to look at when I went to bed that night. A few days later, I put her pink one that I carried her to the vet in back on the bed so she could come lay by me if she needed to visit. So I know how hard it is to see those things that remind us of them.
You know, I'm not sure what is the worst way for a pet to leave us. Suddenly or a long lingering illness? It is not an easy thing either way but watching them suffer with something like cancer is difficult at best. I watched a cat waste away, keeping her comfortable and trying anything to get food & water down her. I thought I'd know the right time to take her and she struggled to stay alive till I got home one night from work. She died a difficult death in my arms one block from the vet. I felt so guilty for waiting too long. I especially did not want her to suffer. I lost a dog that was with me outside planting flowers to another dog being walked on a leash but could not be controlled by his teenage walker. I tried to pry his jaws off my poor little dog but saw him go limp.
10 years is such a long time and I think the longer we have them we get to know what they like, don't like, how to tell what they want when they act a certain way. All the cute things they do, how they love us without reservation, are ALWAYS so happy to see us come home. Heck, I told my hubby that I had Flossie longer than some kids are with you and definately longer than many marriages last. There is just something about a pet that cannot really be explained I think.
I had a dog named Duke as a teenager. Australian Shepherd. I've always wanted another one like him. I've had German Shepherds too.... wonderful dogs. If I were rich and had lots of space I guess I'd have tons of dogs & cats..... Except I have a very hard time when I lose one.
Everyone here has some sort of loss so knows the pain you are feeling right now. Lots of people around us do not understand the connection between man/woman and his/her dog/cat.............. but all of us here do. I hope happy memories of your many years together will bring you some comfort in the days to come.
Post some pictures of Duke when you feel up to it. Ginger
Thanks everybody for your kind words. I dont what to say right now. Im a single guy and DUke was my Best Friend. In the whole 10 or more years I had him we only spent one night apart. Duke had been slowing down quite a bit over the last while but I had no idea he was so sick. Right now I cant think of anything except how much I miss him. At this point I guess I still am in Shock and disbelief.
Im just glad that Duke went quickly and didnt have to go through operations, all sorts of medications etc.. I got Duke originally from the Local SPCA. YOu never have seen a happier dog the Day I brought him home. I guess maybe some good can come from this as some very lucky Dog at the Shelter will be coming to very loving home. Some people say it may not be the right thing to get another dog right away after a loss, but in my case I believe it will help me. I'm sure Duke would not want me to be unhappy. Thanks so much everybody................. David
I am so sorry to hear about your wonderful Duke. I know you must be in absolute shock to have him seem OK one day and then find how it had spread so thoroughly.
I took my Flossies blankets off my bed that she slept on the day I took her to put her to sleep before I took her just so I wouldn't have them there to look at when I went to bed that night. A few days later, I put her pink one that I carried her to the vet in back on the bed so she could come lay by me if she needed to visit. So I know how hard it is to see those things that remind us of them.
You know, I'm not sure what is the worst way for a pet to leave us. Suddenly or a long lingering illness? It is not an easy thing either way but watching them suffer with something like cancer is difficult at best. I watched a cat waste away, keeping her comfortable and trying anything to get food & water down her. I thought I'd know the right time to take her and she struggled to stay alive till I got home one night from work. She died a difficult death in my arms one block from the vet. I felt so guilty for waiting too long. I especially did not want her to suffer. I lost a dog that was with me outside planting flowers to another dog being walked on a leash but could not be controlled by his teenage walker. I tried to pry his jaws off my poor little dog but saw him go limp.
10 years is such a long time and I think the longer we have them we get to know what they like, don't like, how to tell what they want when they act a certain way. All the cute things they do, how they love us without reservation, are ALWAYS so happy to see us come home. Heck, I told my hubby that I had Flossie longer than some kids are with you and definately longer than many marriages last. There is just something about a pet that cannot really be explained I think.
I had a dog named Duke as a teenager. Australian Shepherd. I've always wanted another one like him. I've had German Shepherds too.... wonderful dogs. If I were rich and had lots of space I guess I'd have tons of dogs & cats..... Except I have a very hard time when I lose one.
Everyone here has some sort of loss so knows the pain you are feeling right now. Lots of people around us do not understand the connection between man/woman and his/her dog/cat.............. but all of us here do. I hope happy memories of your many years together will bring you some comfort in the days to come.
Post some pictures of Duke when you feel up to it. Ginger
Hi Dave, I'm so sorry you lost your buddy Duke. It is the hardest thing in the world to let go of something we love and cherish so dearly. It is ok to put away his things for now. In time you will want to put them in his special place. You had no idea how ill he was and you had to make the hardest decision so quickly. My heart aches with yours for that, for I too had to make it quick.
You are so lucky to have had many happy years together as best buds. Duke is now a special angel free of pain and yet always with you. I hope being here at LS will help you find peace and healing. When you are feeling up for it we would love to see pictures or read about a happy memory..Hugs.. Ann
You are so lucky to have had many happy years together as best buds. Duke is now a special angel free of pain and yet always with you. I hope being here at LS will help you find peace and healing. When you are feeling up for it we would love to see pictures or read about a happy memory..Hugs.. Ann
QUOTE (ann @ Dec 6 2008, 02:28 AM)
Hi Dave, I'm so sorry you lost your buddy Duke. It is the hardest thing in the world to let go of something we love and cherish so dearly. It is ok to put away his things for now. In time you will want to put them in his special place. You had no idea how ill he was and you had to make the hardest decision so quickly. My heart aches with yours for that, for I too had to make it quick.
You are so lucky to have had many happy years together as best buds. Duke is now a special angel free of pain and yet always with you. I hope being here at LS will help you find peace and healing. When you are feeling up for it we would love to see pictures or read about a happy memory..Hugs.. Ann
thanks so much Anne and Joanne and Flossies Mom and everybody. Its going to take some time to get over this. I have had to put a Dog to sleep before. About ten years ago. I adopted Duke shortly after this. Weve had some Fabulous times together. When Im feeling a little better I'll tell some great stories about our adventures. At this point I cant bear to even look at his picture, but I will post some when I feel like I can. Right now I have very big hole in my heart. Thanks everybodyYou are so lucky to have had many happy years together as best buds. Duke is now a special angel free of pain and yet always with you. I hope being here at LS will help you find peace and healing. When you are feeling up for it we would love to see pictures or read about a happy memory..Hugs.. Ann
............................ David
Oh David. I am so sorry for you and your poor Duke. I know exactly how you feel: my just over 2 year old cat Iggy was killed by a car Monday night and I feel like I keep waiting for him to appear around every corner, at the sink to beg for water, on his favorite chair on the back deck. Then it hits me all over agin that he is gone, forever. It is just such a shock when they go without any warning. Your brain just can't accept that this wonderful, beloved pet who was here just today is gone without any time for you to prepare yourself for them to be gone. You just keep thinking it isn't possible.
I don't know if you are ready to hear this, but while the way this happened is awful and incredibly painful for you, it was so much more merciful for Duke than if he had suffered for a long time with the cancer. It is just so much harder for you... and I completely understand that. At least Duke was spared something in his passing and you can hopefully take some comfort in that; my Iggy was perfectly healthy before he was hit by that car...
I have done so much reading (and have posted on this site and received SO much help and healing and comfort... you have come to the right place to go though your grieving process) about losing animals and loved ones suddenly, tragically... it causes the absolute worst kind of grief and often comes with a heavy dose of guilt (I have been suffering a LOT from this: all the "what ifs") and depression too.
I have already gotten so much support on this forum: the people here are exceptional, not just in their love of animals, but in their empathy and compassion for us pet parents too. You can say anything, ask anything, post pictures of Duke and have other people admire him (this really helps, somehow!), and generally just hold onto this like a lifeline. I haven't been able to respond to anyone until you, because I have been suffering so much... but when I read about Duke, I just had to respond. You *will* heal, but it will take time. I suggest you do what I did, when you are able: read other people's posts, especially the ones that are similar to yours in some way. You will find them saying the same things you are feeling, and you will feel you have found a community of support. You have.
This forum is amazing. It helps me get out of bed in the morning without my Iggy. I will check in on you in the morning. Try to remember all the good things about Duke, look at pictures, and try to get some sleep. A big hug for you from Florida.
I don't know if you are ready to hear this, but while the way this happened is awful and incredibly painful for you, it was so much more merciful for Duke than if he had suffered for a long time with the cancer. It is just so much harder for you... and I completely understand that. At least Duke was spared something in his passing and you can hopefully take some comfort in that; my Iggy was perfectly healthy before he was hit by that car...
I have done so much reading (and have posted on this site and received SO much help and healing and comfort... you have come to the right place to go though your grieving process) about losing animals and loved ones suddenly, tragically... it causes the absolute worst kind of grief and often comes with a heavy dose of guilt (I have been suffering a LOT from this: all the "what ifs") and depression too.
I have already gotten so much support on this forum: the people here are exceptional, not just in their love of animals, but in their empathy and compassion for us pet parents too. You can say anything, ask anything, post pictures of Duke and have other people admire him (this really helps, somehow!), and generally just hold onto this like a lifeline. I haven't been able to respond to anyone until you, because I have been suffering so much... but when I read about Duke, I just had to respond. You *will* heal, but it will take time. I suggest you do what I did, when you are able: read other people's posts, especially the ones that are similar to yours in some way. You will find them saying the same things you are feeling, and you will feel you have found a community of support. You have.
This forum is amazing. It helps me get out of bed in the morning without my Iggy. I will check in on you in the morning. Try to remember all the good things about Duke, look at pictures, and try to get some sleep. A big hug for you from Florida.
Dave-- just checking in on you! How are you doing? Big hug!
I am sorry for your loss , i lost my best friend tuesday night , he got hit in the road. this has been the worst week of my life i had him 5 years and 3 weeks a rescue as well , the love of my life
i send u hugs and know that u r not alone
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i send u hugs and know that u r not alone
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QUOTE (Canadadave @ Dec 5 2008, 09:43 PM)
Ive been putting Dukes stuff away(his bowl, bed, Toys, leashes etc so I dont have to look at them all the time. I just cant believe this, I had him out for a walk by the Beach yesterday and he even went for a little swim. Im just devastated right now. Please help Pals.......... David
Our animal friends follow the rules of Nature, and in Nature, it is never good to show weakness or illness. And they cannot talk.
Miles had cancer, but till the last few days, she struggled to purr and "Look Normal".
When I saw the XRays, I nearly fainted. When I came home alone, I did two things I never did before:
1) I grabbed a bottle of Scotch and drank from the bottle.
2) I threw away everything that was hers-I could not bear to see them. I SHOULD have donated her special food to a shelter, but....
Maybe it was symbolic grieving or acceptance or closure, I am not sure. My wife said I never smiled or laughed again till Iggy came, but it still messes me up to see reminders of Miles....even the bad ones like destroyed woodwork, but now at least I can smille about some of the crazy and nasty things she did.
It has been 9 months now.
I'm so sorry about Duke. In my lifetime I have had 2 German Shepherds and one Shep/Boxer mix so I understand a lot of what you are saying about Duke. To me mine were all special and wonderful in their own way but my very first German Shepherd I got as a puppy and she made it to age 10 when one day she stopped eating and I immediately took her in for an x-ray and...yes..she was full of cancer tumors and I had to make that terrible decision right then. She never showed it but I can't believe she wasn't suffering when I saw the x-rays.
I think it is harder when it is unexpected (you take them in to the vet, expecting to bring them home with you) and within a few seconds..that alternative is taken away because above all, we truly never want them to suffer and they can't always tell us what is happening, which makes it all the harder to make that decision that is so very final.
The good things you said...about getting Duke from a shelter (a rescue)....having him for 10 years and as I remember....10 seemed like such a short time, the happy, healthy times that you had him for...those memories will help you work through your grief. I understand getting Duke shortly after another had passed away....I always do that myself....I am addicted to that unconditional love and I also feel protective about those who have no homes and so, I open my home time and again.
I also put away my dogs' dishes, collars, leashes...but to this day (which is many years later), I still have them and while newer dogs used them..they will never be thrown out. They are too big for my cats to have used but I feel a sense of comfort having them still with me.
It is normal to feel so very lost and alone but know this, when you come here ...you are never alone. You are among people who have gone through and some are right now going through the same feelings you are. This is the time the pain of missing them, of everything seemed to be happening all at once....is the most intense. Everything you feel we share because we have been there. It is okay to cry, to vent....time and time again. It is such a tremendous hard loss.
One Mom here said it best for me: The pain of losing him will never ever be greater than the joy of knowing him. That thought and the happy memories I am so grateful to have had....really has helped me. The pain never goes away completely because we will miss them forever and the pain and missing them cannot be separated.
Remember you are not alone. Come here and write your thoughts and feelings. There are many here waiting to help. There is always someone listening.....
Hugs for you and your boy, Duke. He is part of your heart and that is one place where he can never leave you.
I wish you peace and healing...but it takes time and it takes baby steps...but we are here with hands held out...ready to show you the roads that have helped us go forward with healing.
Judy
I think it is harder when it is unexpected (you take them in to the vet, expecting to bring them home with you) and within a few seconds..that alternative is taken away because above all, we truly never want them to suffer and they can't always tell us what is happening, which makes it all the harder to make that decision that is so very final.
The good things you said...about getting Duke from a shelter (a rescue)....having him for 10 years and as I remember....10 seemed like such a short time, the happy, healthy times that you had him for...those memories will help you work through your grief. I understand getting Duke shortly after another had passed away....I always do that myself....I am addicted to that unconditional love and I also feel protective about those who have no homes and so, I open my home time and again.
I also put away my dogs' dishes, collars, leashes...but to this day (which is many years later), I still have them and while newer dogs used them..they will never be thrown out. They are too big for my cats to have used but I feel a sense of comfort having them still with me.
It is normal to feel so very lost and alone but know this, when you come here ...you are never alone. You are among people who have gone through and some are right now going through the same feelings you are. This is the time the pain of missing them, of everything seemed to be happening all at once....is the most intense. Everything you feel we share because we have been there. It is okay to cry, to vent....time and time again. It is such a tremendous hard loss.
One Mom here said it best for me: The pain of losing him will never ever be greater than the joy of knowing him. That thought and the happy memories I am so grateful to have had....really has helped me. The pain never goes away completely because we will miss them forever and the pain and missing them cannot be separated.
Remember you are not alone. Come here and write your thoughts and feelings. There are many here waiting to help. There is always someone listening.....
Hugs for you and your boy, Duke. He is part of your heart and that is one place where he can never leave you.
I wish you peace and healing...but it takes time and it takes baby steps...but we are here with hands held out...ready to show you the roads that have helped us go forward with healing.
Judy
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