My very best friend and constant companion has suc%%bed to Splenic Hermangiosarcoma. I have done EVERYTHING to save his life (including removing his spleen) but we both lost the battle. He has no quality of life now. He has stopped eating and cannot get up the stairs as of yesterday. I have an appointment at 10:00am this morning with the vet and in all probability it will be his last day because he can never live as a dog ever again.
This is perhaps especially hard on me. I live alone and work from home and my dog has been a constant at my side for the past 8 years. When I left the house, he was with me almost ALWAYS. He was the best dog I have ever owned and incredibly of good nature, stunning in looks, smarter that some people I have met and loyal and loving above all else. He is a stumpy tail 1/2 masked Blue Merl Blue Heeler named Cowboy.
I'm having a hard time dealing with putting him down but as I tried to be the most responsible pet owner ever, I can't just let him waste away.
When he was diagnosed I knew there was little long term hope but that did not stop me from trying. I had a battery of Vets see him in both Holistic and medical practices. I changed his diet to a combination of cooked meets and fresh veggies and Hills ND. He got his medicine everyday without fail and on time. I fought, he fought, we both lost and I did not gain months but two weeks after his spleen was removed.
My house is quite this morning, he is in the other room as I type this. I'm trying to imagine coming home today to an empty house. I'm trying to celebrate his life but all I can do is cry.
I'm so sorry Cowboy, if there was anything in the world I could have done, I would have done it. You enriched my life beyond words. You always made me smile and I was always so proud of you for the personality you are. Your passing will not go un-noticed as I will make a donation in your name to the Dog Cancer institute. You will never be forgotten by all who knew you and I promise to see to that. I love you too much to see you suffer and as I always wanted only the best for you, I cannot let this just take you for the sake of one more day for me to be by your bedside. Just know that you did not live in vain. Your presence bought smiles and laughter and above all else real joy to everyone who was so privileged to know you. You're illness has taught me a new appreciation for life in all forms and this may be the greatest contribution you gave to me. I thank you for bringing me life and sharing your life with me. I was the one who was gifted by your presence and you will always have a very special place in my heart and my memories. Whatever happens this morning, I want you to know what you mean to me.
Love,
Dad