I'm so glad I found this sight, just because I need to know there are people out there who understand the heartbreak of losing a pet. My dog was almost nine years old, I'd had him since he was five weeks. He was a sweet dog with the heart of a puppy but he was very hyper and difficult to control. I always felt I had failed him because I was never able to train him to come when he was loose. Because of this, he spent the last year of his life tied. He had a 20 foot run outside and a dog house. He spent the nights indoors, but even so , we often had to tie him to a leash indoors as he was an escape artist and would run for it as soon as he caught sight of the door opening. The reason for this, simply because he loved to chase cars I didn't want him to get hurt or god forbid, hurt someone else.
Sunday afternoon, the sun was shining and it was beautiful outside. The snow was melting and the birds were chirping, I couldn't take it anymore. What harm could there be in letting the old boy run for awhile? Two hours after he got loose there was a knock at the door. He finally caught a car. He wasn't dead but he was injured so badly he couldn't move and was choking on his own blood. We had no choice but to put him down. We live out in the country and the vet is a good 20 miles away, he wouldn't have made it so we had to do it ourselves, then we had to build a fire. It was absolutely heartbreaking. I've been crying for two days. I feel like I failed him, like I didn't give him enough time or attention, like I had no business owning such a beautiful sweet creature when I was ill equipped to care for him properly. I thought of finding him a home a couple of years ago but I realized that someone else would be inheriting all his bad habits and he was mine and that wouldn't be right.
Poor Tripper dog, I will miss you so, I did love you and I am so sorry if I ever neglected or hurt you. I hope you are free now bubba boy. I loved you and you didn't deserve to die like this.
How will I get over this?

I am so sorry to hear about Tripper. The deep seated guilt and sadness we feel when we lose a loved furry kid is unbearable, especially when the death is very recent.

In time the horrible feelings you are having now will lessen and not be so acute. Healing takes time and you came to the right place to find peace and comfort. There are many beautiful people here who will help you get through the agonizing task of working through your grief and doubt.

I don't think any of us ever get over such a loss when we lose someone that is loved so much. But in time the good healthy memories you and Tripper shared will be much stronger than the uncomfortable feelings you have now.

When you are ready tell us more about Tripper. Post pictures if you have them. Come here and talk and share your feelings. All of these things will help you continue your journey of healing.

May you be blessed with the peace and comfort you are seeking.

Thank you for your kind words. I really feel that I didn't give him enough attention, I was always too busy, and that is what I carry with me now. If I'd only taken a little moree time, to make sure he knew he was loved. I think he was lonely before he died and no dog should ever be lonely. That is what I carry with me now. I feel awful, but perhaps in time, I will forgive myself. I hope he has. I did truly love him.

Libby:

Tripper knows you love him. Dogs just know these things. I am so sorry about what happened. I've had dogs from puppyhood and they are always appreciative of whatever attention they get from us. Sometimes just trying to survive in life, we are busy working or whatever we have to do and we can't always provide them with the attention they would like but they do love unconditionally which means they love us and that's why for them there is nothing to forgive because they are happy with the happy times they share with us. You took care of him for 9 years..you must have many pictures and happy memories of that time. I am glad you had those years with him.

When I look back at the different pets I have lost over the years..I finally came to realize that no matter how hard we try to do the right thing...if the time comes (decided by whatever decides this)..we are helpless to stop it and we have no control over losing them.

As I said, Tripper knows you love him, and there is nothing to forgive because these beautiful, wonderful babies that come into our lives...never blame us for anything..that's why it is called unconditional love.

Take Care and post back with stories, pictures, write Tripper a letter,...whatever helps you relieve some of the pain until enough time can go by to lessen the pain.
You are not alone in your feelings for we have all gone through such losses and no matter how many times it happens...the pain is never less but what we have to learn is to cope with it. One "mom" here wrote to the effect that: The pain of losing him will never ever be greater than the joy of knowing him. It is the memory of that joy that helps us heal. I wish you peace and know Tripper will always be with you as he is a part of your heart and that can never be taken away.