Thanks to the few persons (and you know who you are ) who have been incredibly supportive during this difficult time. To respond to the countless criticisms and skeptical remarks, I have none. Only this, I don't owe anyone an explanation or count by count recollection of all that transpired w/my cat Max. Everything happened so fast, he declined w/in hours of having him home and I felt that the best choice for him was to put him down. I am still grieving and this forum has made it only harder.
I wish you peace-

Dear catlover...............I hope you will reconsider and come back to us very soon. Please don't let what people say here make you feel any worse than you already do. Just because someone expresses their opinion here doesn't make their opinion the truth for anybody but themselves.

I feel horrible for what you must be feeling and I actually have thought about leaving here myself as a result of how bad it made me feel to see what otherwise loving people had to say to each other that came across as mean spirited.

This forum has been a truly wonderful experience for me up until now. We all need to embrace each other and remember what we first came here for. All of us came looking for comfort and understanding. When I read someones post, and it brings up bad feelings, I take a cooling off period and then take another look at myself and why I am feeling that way. Often when people read other peoples stories, particularly when it hits close to home, it stirs up their sadness and sorrow again out of the grief and sorrow they have suffered with the passing of their loved furry kids.

Perhaps we can all forgive each other and learn from our mistakes. I hope and pray that we can all get along and say what we have to say in a more loving and respectful way. Let there be peace in this forum once again so that we can freely talk to each other with the love in our hearts.

Hugs and comfort to you catlover......Beth

Catlover,
I haven't been coming around a lot lately but I would like to say that I am so sorry for your loss of Max and for the experience you had here in this forum. I would ask you to reconsider but I would be such a hypocrite if I said that I would after going through everything that you have. During your mourning, you must do what will make you healthy and sometimes traumatic first impressions stick with us so I do understand. I wish you so much peace in your grief and I hope that you will find comfort.

Take care of yourself-

once emotions calm, anyone who has decided to leave should come back to help with their grieving process. that's why the site is here. we ocassionaly have flare-ups, it is the nature of a forum such as this.

catlover2, I would like to offer my sympathy to you and your family in the loss of Max.

I only wish your experience here could have made you feel better. Often times we forget that people are grieving and very vunerable. Words written can be misunderstood or even hurtful. No one here knew Max the way you did. And only you could make the best decision for Max. Trust me we all go through the guilty....what if's. We can only do so much for our pet's....and then it's out of our hands.

On any discussion board people offer their opinions. Some people offer them in a mild manner. Other's not so. Just remember that it's only an opinion.

I wish you well as you grieve the loss of your friend Max.

Ah no. That's sad to see. Emotions do run high on a forum like this; we are all grieving. My Bono has been dead 17 months, and I'm still grieving. I don't think we ever get over these devatating losses.

I read your posts; my Bono was also 8-years-old when he died; far too young. He was my puppy. He had congestive heart disease, and eventually went into heart failure and passed away in an oxygen tank at the vets. Would I have euthanised him if he had have come through his final ordeal at the vets? If the quality of his life was gone? Yes I would. Euthanising a terminally ill animal is one of the most selfless acts we can give to our pets.

I worked in a veterinary clinic, and there were so many animals left suffering by their owners, who could not bear to euthanise their animals, wanting them to die naturally so they would not feel directly responsible for their death. So every week the animals suffered, and every week, I broke my heart for them, wishing their owners would put their animals first and end their suffering. You spared your Max his suffering, and took on his suffering yourself. For now you are heartbroken ... But he is at peace.

I think you probably knew he'd continue suffering, even in expert hands ... and that's why you returned for him. Of course your posts were hard to follow; it all happened at once for you. What a horrible couple of weeks you went through.

I like what you said about him being in your life before your hubby and kids. So was Bono. I'd had him since I was 14, long before I met my fiancé and had my son. That always made him that bit more special, like Max to you I'm sure.

I was fortunate that I did not have to euthanise Bono ... I'd offered him every treatment available. On the day he died, the vet told me 'There is no more medication we can offer Bono', but still I begged his vets to help him, and whilst he died in the oxygen tank, I sat at home (my biggest regret) terrifed to return to the vets because I knew I'd have to sign that piece of paper ...

But he died on his own.

That was 16th October 2006. I am not on this site as often as I was, mostly because I now have a baby. But I'll always be a member; it helps me to speak of Bono. Without a site such as this, I'd have noone to talk to about him.

Pay no heed to posts which upset you. And please take care. x

Catlover2, I'm so sorry for the loss of your baby. It's hard enough to have to go through that without having to deal with judgements and criticizing opinions. I know because I've been on both sides here. We are all just human and I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive us if we have come across too harshly. I also hope that you give us another chance to show you that we do care about what you are going through. Regardledss, I know that you have to do what you have to do.

Take care
John

Love Them I have to reply to your comment here because poor Bue's Mommy has been censured, right after your post. You say: " If you are in pain we don't know about, please tell us. " Thank you for this opportunity, Bue's post being closed, I have no choice but to come back to the most appropriately titled thread to clarify something for all aboard and it can not be a pm since you represent so many readers here who according to what you say are backing you.

So here comes the integral post that you were priviledged to write before the unjust cut off


When LoveThem speaks of "others" it's really me that she is targeting just like I was targeted with the "some people" in the previous Catlover post, "Thanks for your Support with my Max" When Love Them pretends to have been a victim and claims she only asked a question re read the thread: http://lightning-strike.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=4475
provided LT hasn't modified it as she has done in the past)and figure out for yourselves if Love Them's style of questionning was (a) compassionate and loving or ( confrontational and accusatory, figure it all out from the soapbox conversations that were going on Joanne's thread at the same time as Love Them was giving CatlOver the third degree. About the pm's you seem to be getting Love Them if there is such a 'number' of members who you seem to represent and speak for, why the hell are they all hiding behind you instead of posting on their own. I have received a number of supportive pms as well but I don't make this into a gang up affair.
I also think that both Joanne and Love Them could have been a bit more tolerant and just let the thing go before it was closed considering the recovery from the April 1 surgery that Bue is going through for the less than last two weeks. Some way to help someone heal. Same for Catlover, some way to welcome someone who was deep in grief. Good Grief some of you just don't get it at all do you.

censorship is invalid. i was merely quelling the situation before it became a human pissing match, which are typically worse than a cat fight. both parties had the chance to make amends prior to the thread closing, that's the only intent. i play no favorites here. the thread can be reopened once people act like adults.

toonie, as i said in email, i wish you well in your travels. we will leave the light on should you decide to return.

this thread, too, is now closed. i will continue closing threads or deleting negative postings at my discretion. rehashes of this topic may result in banning of any and all individuals involved. i do not have time nor patience to deal with this matter any further. i detest personal attacks or he-said-she-saids in public, it shows weakness on the part of the poster.

if it is time for some of the board's longer-term members to move along, so be it. i also wish you well.