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Lightning-Strike Pet Loss Support Forum > Pet Loss Support > Death and Dying Pet Support
bcurrie
HI everyone and thanks for this site. I lost my cat HB yeaterday and I'm just trying to get throught the grief. H.B. ( home boy, originally homeless boy) was dumped outside of an apartment when they moved and I was lucky enough to have found him. I was a vet tech at the time and seeing as my sister (my roomie) didn't want anymore pets at that time ( we already had a peke) HB became our blood donor cat at the hospital that I worked at. He had it pretty good there, free roam of the hospital and he only had to donate twice in the 6years he lived there, saving 2 other cats lives in the process.

We use to play hide and go seek through the hospital at night and we became best friends. I eventually talked my sister into taking him about 8 years ago and he became the best cat anyone could have. Very coool cat, very Garfield like! He was so good natured, never used his claws on anyone and even let our pet bird crawl all over him.
We found out 2 months ago that he had FELV in his bone marrow and he was terminal. We were shocked because he was always up to date on his shots and never around other cats but I guess there are never any guarantees. He went into the vet hospital for a blood transfusion when he got really weak about 40 days ago and came home a new cat! Eating and drinking and playing like he use to; he loved to push us with his paw! His PCV started to drop again a few days ago and the vets had said we could keep doing the tranfusions untill basically they stopped working or something else gave up first. I brought him back in yesterday for his second tranfusion thinking it would be like last time, but it didn't work. They said it didn't take this time and he was actively killing off any new rbcs that he had just recieved. They could try again but of course no guarantees. I decided to take him home to think about it. As soon as I got him back he started to collapse and pass out. He was also very jaundiced and was starting to vomit. I knew it was time to end his suffering and brought him back to CSU and they put him down. So right now i'm dealing with the shock,denial and guilt. I know the transfusion was his last hope and it would only buy us time anyway, but I keep thnking if I just left him alone what would have happened? He had stopped eating and drinking so he eventually would have passed on his own and he was hiding and not happy anymore. Being a vet tech for over 20 years I know I made the right decision but I also know you always secound guess yourself at this time.

Anyway thanks for the outlet....
SJ J & S
Hi bcurrie not only did you give HB A life but a precious extra 40 days.
I know youll be having second thoughts now, we all do, but sounds to me like you only took a few painful hours away from him, what you did was out of love for HB and it meant that he had you beside him when he went and is no longer in pain.

Its so hard to loose our lovely pets and even harder when we have had to make that decision, I should imagine that you sister is very upset too and its nice to have someone around who feels the same as you do. Eventually youll be able to laugh at the memories but for now we know only too well how bad the pain feels, I especially found this site my life line, someone to talk to in the middle of the night, knowing I'm not alone and that everyone here understands.

Take care
Love Sue
Saki & Freyja's Mom
It's so hard to lose someone you've loved for 14+ years. I am so sorry for your loss. The fact of the matter is, it is a traumatic thing, and only time will help you get through that initial shock and despair.

But posting out here seems to help a lot of people. So does memorializing their loved one. Make photo albums or collages, plant trees or a garden site. Maybe the vet's office you're at will let you put up photos or something. Talking to people who understand helps. Crying (a lot) helps. Thinking about the rainbow bridge helps. .... Thinking about "what if's" does not seem to help....

Anyway, I am deeply sorry for your loss.

Love,
Jennifer
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