I just started a graduate class this week. One of the assignments is to write a personal narrative about an important personal event. Of course I needed to write about my Jordan' s recent death. I'd like to share my story with you all here, even though it is just a first draft. I'm still thinking of a title. Next week we have to share our story with the entire class and I am terrified. Not only because of the writing but because it is such a personal subject. Well, here goes....

“He has lost the sparkle in his eye. He has given up.” The words hung on my shoulders like a thick wet towel. I suddenly became very aware of my contact lenses. Were they fogging up or was I going to pass out? “This isn’t happening,” I remember thinking as I quickly sat down on the small red rug in the examining room. “Come here, boy” I whispered in a crackely voice. Jordan’s black body swayed slightly as he walked the few steps over to my husband and I. We lovingly ran our hands over the top of his head and caressed his silken velvet ears. I put my lips to the spot in between his eyes that I had kissed a million times before. The brown eyes that had always conveyed gentleness and love now looked back at my own tear filled eyes. His eyes seemed almost unfamiliar to me. Perhaps it was the weight loss over the past few weeks or perhaps his eyes were wide from pain. Regardless of the reason, the vet was right. They had lost their sparkle.
My heart shattered as we said our good-byes to Jordan. I watched both in horror and in relief as his heavy, labored breathing quietly and quickly changed to slow deep breaths and then stopped. My sobs began to take on a life of their own as I felt his last breath brush against my cheek and evaporate into the air. “He is gone. I’m really sorry,” the vet said as he slipped out of the room.
To me, Jordan was no less valued than any other family member. He was more than “just a pet.” He was my shadow; my constant and loving companion. Jordan protected me, made sure I was never lonely, listened to me without judgement, played with me and always made me laugh.
Jordan was right at my feet through all of my adult life. When my husband knelt down on one knee with a ring in his hand, whose black nose pushed its way under his arm and up into my face? Jordan! Whenever I walked through the door he was always waiting for me, wagging his whole body in utter joy. He made me feel like I was the most important person in the world. Jordan sat with me through the very early hours of labor as I tried to let my husband get a few extra hours of sleep before we drove to the hospital. I’ll never forget the perplexed look on his face as I did my Lamaze breathing. “Hee-hee! Whoo-whoo!” Jordan always got up with me in the middle of the night to feed my newborn daughter. Whenever I nursed my child, Jordan would lay on my feet holding one of his toy stuffed animals in his mouth. I guess he wanted to nurse, too! He watched me with concern in his eyes when she would cry. He shared with me every magical moment of being a first time mother.
When it is my time to leave this life, what kind of mother will my children say that I was? Will they say that I was always there for them and loved them unconditionally? That I protected them and never let them feel lonely? Maybe they will say that I listened to them without judgement? Yes, indeed. Jordan was certainly more than “just a pet.”

As "my girl Lucy" is laying right beside our computer as I type this, I re-read your "personal story"......

Please, may I say again, "ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT"!!!!!!!

Yes, your beloved Jordan was much, much more than "a pet"............

All of you............."YOU WERE A FAMILY", (and, a precious one at that)!!!

God Bless!

Love, Denise

WOW.

Tears flowed as I read your story. I am so glad you will be sharing it with others. For those who don't already "feel" for animals, I believe it will even influence them.

What a wonderful Mom you are.

And you are a very gifted writer---a true genius with words. The mark of a great writer is the ability to engage the reader to the point where s/he is in your shoes and is momentarily unaware of the boundaries between his/her world and yours. I think you've accomplished this task brilliantly!

Let us know how the reading goes!!! I can hardly wait to hear.

Jordan is proud of you as a writer---and especially as a Mom.

That was absolutely beautiful. Thank-you so much for sharing it with us.
Jackie