Hello all,

I posted here a few months ago, right after losing my beloved guinea pig Peach. I found much support here during a very difficult time, and now I'm going to need it again.

In all my life, I have never loved any pet as much as I love my rat, Pearl. I know that sounds nuts; I've had so many dogs, cats, lizards, etc. but for some reason, I am more attached to Pearl than I've been to any of them. She's just over a year and a half old, and we just found out she likely has heart failure (or cancer, hard to tell). The treatment isn't working, and so now I'm just watching her struggle.

The thought of losing my Pearl is unbearable. My heart has been torn open. I would give anything in the world to heal her, to have her for just a little longer, to have her be my healthy, sprightly little rat again. I cannot bear this pain. I just keep holding her, looking at her, and can't bear that she is fading away. She isn't gone, and yet this pain and mourning is overwhelming me.

Pearl is the love of my life. I never knew I could love anything so much. Throughout her life, I had moments of dread when I thought of what it would be like to lose her. Now it's staring me in the face, much sooner than I'd ever imagined. Just a few days ago we thought she just had a cold! And now this. It sounds awful, but I feel like I wish it could have been one of my other pets...if it had to happen. Pearl is my number one, my little rat soul mate, and I can't say goodbye yet. I just can't say goodbye.

I just don't want to see her in pain. If she gets worse, I know the decision I'll have to make. I am beside myself with grief. I'll post a pic when I can, she is the most beautiful little girl in the world.

From a very, very heartbroken Katie

I'm so sorry Katie. I wish I could do something to ease your pain.

There is nothing worse than losing a little soul mate. This will kill you, but your love for Pearl will carry you through. Lean on us, and love Pearl with every fiber of your being.

I will be thinking of you.

Katie, we all understand. There is no other pain like it. Please know you are in my thoughts..

My thoughts and heart are with you! You will know what to do! Trust your heart!

I am so sorry that your Pearl is so sick.
Its just awful to watch a beloved pet decline in front of your eyes and not be able to do anything. I have been there and its just heartbreaking, I hope your baby isn't suffering.
You are in my thoughts.
Cleo 1

It isn't nuts at all. When we let our little companions into our lives they truly change who we are.

I know your pain all to well, as mine is still very much at the surface. I lost my precious bunny companion 14 days ago and the days seem to drag slowly, dragging my pain along with it.

I have not posted here for a while because I have kind of shut down. When my sweet baby boy died I thought I wasn't going to make it. So, basically I've shut down that horrific pain I had been going through the first week of Bun's death.

My dear friend, I'm afraid there will be nothing you will be able to do. This will clearly hit you hard and it will hurt. I have never felt hurt like this.

If, perhaps, there will not be many who will be able to help you, I suggest you come here, or even call a pet loss hotline, as I did.

My heart goes out to you and your little one. Bless both of you in this terrible time.


I would like to invite you to read my thread. You can read what others here said to me in my desperate reaching out from the grief I was, and am enduring. It helped then. I should probably have kept coming here a bit more, but the pain gets to be too much sometimes and I got literally worn out from crying and typing for days.

I don't know if reading my tale of woe will help you in your painful time, but reading beautiful words of support does help. If not my thread, then others here.

Take care.

http://lightning-strike.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=3771

Katie

Hi honey I remember you from when you lost your Peach. I'm so sorry it's happening again honey.

It's not nuts to love a rat, Pearl is your friend and your baby. Love is love. Just try to love and enjoy what time you have left with her. Make sure you tell her everything you want her to know. Try not to mourn her before she is gone. Ask Peach to watch for her and take care of her when her time comes.

I'm thinking of you and Pearl