Hi all - a tribute to my cat, who was put to sleep today after complete kidney failure:

Sept. 1991: Katie Belle is born but she's not my cat yet.

March 1992: The cat yet to be named is rescued out of a tree by the fire department - kind person brings her to vet.

Someone I work with asks, anyone want a cat? I say yes. The last pet I owned was 16 years before, a dachsund, who died of food poisoning. Very traumatic. But a cat, well, a cat's different, right? She's a gray brown American short hair with a distinct V on her head.

Somewhere around 1994: we live in the old section of a city, a townhouse built around 1812 - Katie Belle can get onto the roofs and literally walk from building to building. There's tall trees next to the building. Occasionally, she swipes bats from the trees and brings them into the house. Once she got a bird inside. Another time a locust.

around the same time: she chased a bird and ran right off the roof - fell about 12 feet. Life #1.

also around same time: gets out and probably spends the night locked in nearby warehouse and runs out when they open the door. The next day someone comes to say the hairdresser down the street found a cat and is feeding it tuna fish. Yep - it's Katie Belle.

Katie Belle and her friend, The Kid, a big tomcat, are taken by us to the Outer Banks for vacation. I'm worried because I'm out on the beach and she's laying on our cottage rental's back porch with nothing to keep her from running away (no leash). I try to put her inside the house but she yells at me - she wants to stay in the sun. I oblige her (the first of many such obliges). She remains on that porch the entire day without running. That's when I know: she's my cat.

By the time she's 7/8 she calms down. She's an inside cat but occasionally can't resist trying to break free. Sometimes she's gone for hours. Once I put her litter box outside and I wake up at around midnight to find her on the back porch.

She moves three times, eventually to a little house in the country.

Along the way, I start calling her various nicknames: Little, Dippy. Dippy sticks, because she is a dippy cat, but that was part of her appeal. We fight all the time, about her being on the bed while I'm fixing it; laying down in the middle of a space so it's hard to walk past her. All good natured fighting.

Two years go: diagnosed with the beginnings of kidney disease. Placed on K/D diet.

Three weeks ago: about a month shy of her 16th birthday. She stops eating and starts looking very thin and sunken around the back thighs. We buy her Friskies turkey and giblets which seems to perk her up. She doesn't seem as coordinated as she was and barely acknowledges us when we call her name.

Yesterday: husband takes her to vet; she's dropped to 8 pounds. Vet says she doesn't have long and we decide the only humanitarian thing to do is put her to sleep - since the rest of her days would be spent hooked up to machines and maybe on meds - and we couldn't put her through that.

Today we miss her terribly. There was no one to say good bye to this morning when we left for work. I look in all the spaces she used to lie in and I see her everywhere. She was my little friend.

In a week we'll get her ashes. We'll keep them for a while but maybe when the sadness ends will scatter the ashes in the garden.

I know of others who have lost pets and replaced them immediately. There's no replacement for Katie Belle right now. I think we'll probably get a dog.

Thanks, all, for paying attention.

I'm so sorry you lost your Katie Belle, your Dippy. She sounds like a wonderful cat. They are such hunters and bring such excitement into your life. You took on her pain so she could go and be happy. She is hunting something somewhere now.

It's hard to be without them, we miss them so much. I can tell you loved your Dippy sticks, loved the things she got into. I think the thing I miss the most about our Moustache kitty, who passed four months ago, is his demanding. It was delightful.

When you feel like it I'd love to see a picture of her.

Thinking of you and Katie Belle

I'm so sorry for your loss of your Katie Belle. She sounds like such a wonderful cat and had a very good life with you.

I know how hard it is to make the decision to let them go. It is the hardest decision I ever had to make. Katie Belle is free and happy now and will be waiting to see you again someday.

I would love to see a picture of your girl, when you're up to posting it.

Thank you all for your kind words.

One thing about Katie Belle - she had a temper. She mauled the vet 2 years ago, (despite our warnings to him that he'd get swiped at as soon as she was out of her carrier - he laughed it off; well, she told him) - anyway, I think as a very senior cat (more senior than I realized) she was very crotchety and less tolerant of strangers. She'd only let my husband and I touch her.

My point is: my husband was the one who took her to the vet yesterday because he had the day off. I had to work. so I got his phone call at work and I said tell them not to put her to sleep until I could get there to say good bye.

Well, true to form, my Katie Belle tried to maul the nurse as she was taken out of the cage. She was probably terribly afraid but it was very characteristic of Katie Belle, to come out with her claws ready.

And I said to myself, good for you Katie Belle, you go down fighting.

Ah, well. Sorry I have no photos - I'm not digitally hooked up at home (I'm at work now). About 10 years ago I painted her and I dug that out from storage this morning and hung it.

Katie Belle was herself, that makes her special. I say it too, good for you Katie Belle, 'Do not go gently into that long night'.

Love

Dear Katie Belle's mom, I just had to write to you and tell you how sorry I am about your beloved kitty passing away.I understand the heartache you are going thur.My baby boy Sox had to be put to sleep back on Oct. 13th for kidney failure.He also had feline diabetes and was 16 years old.We still miss him every day but I know we did the right thing for him.You did what was best for your baby too so please don't ever feel guilty about that decision.I know everyone always says that time helps to ease the pain but it really is the truth.You'll never forget her and she will always live in your heart but as time goes by you'll be able to remember her with smiles and laughter instead of with tears and sadness.I hope you'll come here whenever you need a friend to talk to.We all be here and we understand the pain you are experiencing.You'll be in my thoughts and prayers.Sincerely,Renee (Sox's mom)

This girl was quite the character, my Nala has a similar personality and we all love her for it. A tough but so sweet girl.

I don't blame Katie Belle, I dread dentist & doctor appointments and there are a few times with some of the insensitive ones if I had claws I would have done the same She sounds like she was a tough girl but she had a tender heart. You done what you had to do to keep her from suffering, I know after we put down Leo I second guessed whether I had done it too soon even though the vet told me his liver was failing. After so many years it is so hard to say goodbye, these little furry creatures really get to our hearts.

It sounds like Katie Belle had some wild adventures and a interesting life.. and was loved by her people. Eventually those good memories will outnumber the sad ones. The painting will be a wonderful tribute to her. Our thoughts are with you.

Thank you for sharing your Katie Belle's story with us. I am very sorry for your loss.


It's not that we "replace" them. I still think about Simba everyday and remember him in my heart. He was the first pet I had and my best friend. He taught me all about loving a pet and being loved in return. It is something that I want with me at all times now.

Only you will know when it is right to get another pet, cat or dog. Remember, there is always a new best friend out there waiting for you to give him/her a good loving home.

You know what really hurts? I was so certain Katie Belle was coming home from the vet Monday I never really acknowledged her when I left for work that morning - I guess I was sort of in denial.

I thank you all for your kind words - we await her ashes now. The vet tells me she was put to sleep right after I left her - I'm glad for that.

My husband and I plan to go out to an animal rescue this weekend - and yes, Simba's Daddy, it is that unconditional love that you want back. Problem is, I'd be expecting a cat to replace KB's personality and I don't want the cat to suffer because she's/he's not KB. Does that make sense?

I ran a name past my husband this morning - how about Lula Belle for another cat? He said absolutely not.

But I still don't think I can deal with another cat (or dog) until we handle KB's ashes. Has anyone else had a cat/dog cremated? What did you do with the ashes? I'd really like to know.

Katie Belle's Mommy

For me, getting the ashes back was a good thing. My baby was home, safe with me. My hubby and I went together to get them and I held the box close to my heart all the way home. I can put it in his favorite places, like in the window in the sun or in the bedroom when we sleep. When I am really lonely and sad for him I still hold him close to my heart.

We bought a small curio cabinet and put his urn on top, and some of his toys, his dishes and some pictures inside. We want to be cremated when we go and we plan on getting an urn big enough for us, Moose, and the cat kids we have now. When we get the big urn we will put his ashes in it, and scatter some in the backyard he loved so much. I think his daddy wants some ashes to put in a vial he can wear.


It does make sense. No another pet, cat or dog won't be like Katie Belle, it will be it's own special being. A relationship takes time. You have to take them and love them as they come, not as you expect them to be. You think you can't and then one day you notice they have put their little claws in your heart and you love them for them.

Love

Moose's Mom said it best with relationships taking time. We just got a new little guy only two weeks after the loss of our Leo. He does not have the wonderful quirks our Leo had but has some other unique behaviors of his own that endear him to us... and he is just so young yet and learning to respond when we talk to him. It does help ease the pain having him around and his own personality is beginning to appear and a bond has started with us.

I still miss looking into the eyes of that wonderful 'old soul', but it took time for that bond and it strengthened by the year. Everything takes time and if you ever get another one you will probably love it for its own personality and look.