Hi there, this is my first posting here. I've come, like many of you, to share my story and find some solace in the company of people who are going through the same thing as I am.

Last Tuesday I noticed my 12-year old cat Katie (my avatar is a picture of her) was not acting like herself. I noticed a lump on her side that I hadn't felt before. I am a veterinary technician so I took her into work the next day. The vet at my clinic referred Katie to an ultrasound veterinarian. On Thursday we got the diagnosis: Katie had a massive pancreatic tumour that had wrapped itself around her left kidney and had cut off one of her ureters. The vet said the condition is extremely rare and we would have only started to see signs within the past week. She said she would be surprised if Katie made it through the weekend. I was devestated. My family and I spent Thursday night and Friday morning with Katie and Friday afternoon we took her to my clinic and I held her as she was euthanized. So in a span of 4 days, we thought she was sick, got a diagnosis, and lost her. If you had told me 2 weeks ago this would have happened I wouldn't have believed it. Katie had so much personality, so much spirit, and then bam, she's gone. I think it's because it was so sudden and unexpected that I am having such a hard time with it. She was only 12, she should have had so many more good years left. We see cats at the clinic who are 19. It's just.. not fair. Anyway, thanks for listening, I know there are others who feel the same way I do and that is comforting in itself- that I'm not alone.

You aren't alone. Your Katie is beautiful! I understand the shock you feel. You go along thinking everything is okay and you have years with your furbaby, and you just don't.

Our Moose kitty gave us a shock too. On Monday Oct 23rd, he had a great day. He felt good, had fun, ate well. He went outside on a leash and got to go out when his daddy came home from work. He came inside and asked for food, turned and walked into the living room, laid down in his favorate place, and started to scream and convulse. We grabbed him and took him to he ER, less than 1/2 hour away, but he didn't make it. He was only 10 years old. In 1/2 hour our lives changed forever.

I keep thinking, I got that before I knew he was going away. I decided that before he left. It hurts. I know how much you miss your Katie.

Here is a >>>>BIG HUG<<<<. Let me know if there is anything else I can do for you.

Love
Lori

Thank you for your reply- yes she was a beautiful girl, that picture was taken the day before she died. I know, in a way we are lucky in that we got to say a proper goodbye to her. The whole thing was just such a whirlwind. With our dog last year, we were expecting it so we got to prepare ourselves a bit more. This was such a different experience than that was.

And I can't help but think, what if I hadn't felt that lump and brought her in on Tuesday? She would have died all alone a few days later in tremendous pain. We would have found her somewhere in our house, passed away, without having said goodbye and "I love you" to her one last time. I am taking some comfort in the fact that I was able to help her die painlessly in my arms with her whole family surrounding her.

I can't imagine the shock you must have gone through with Moose, I'm so very sorry to hear about your loss as well. It's nice to be able to talk about the loss we are feeling without being ridiculed or thought less of because it's "just an animal". So thank you all.

I don't know if we ever really see it coming, even when it is clear as day. My dog was diagnosed with a congenital liver defect when she was 9 months old. The Vet said that Yorkies with this condition usually didn't live past 3 or 4 years. Well, my Daisy made it until almost 12, and although I always knew that this time bomb was inside of her, I couldn't really believe that it would ever happen. I came to believe in some way that she would always be with me, although I rationally knew that this was impossible. When she passed away, my grief and shock was overwhelming.

I can only imagine how horrible it must be when there really is no sign or knowledge of a problem and a beloved pet dies suddenly. At least I was able to really say good-bye to her and let her know how much I loved her.

I am so sorry for your loss.

Daisy's Mommy

Hello.I just wanted to say that I am so sorry for your loss.It is so shocking when it happens fast,you don't even get the time to adjust to them being sick and then they are gone.I know what your going thur, my beloved kitty Sox had to be put to sleep a month ago because his kidneys were failing.There wasn't anything they could do for him so we chose to end his suffering and let him go home.You made the only choice you could have made.You did not want to see your baby suffer.It was a act of unconditional love and it is the hardest decision you'll ever have to make.I know just how your feeling and I am so sorry that your going thur this tough time.Try to remember that your baby is no longer in pain and she is free from her failing body,happy and young again just waiting for you on the other side.I truly believe that our pets have a place where they wait for us to join them on our passing.You have my thoughts and prayers and I hope you'll find comfort in knowing you did the right thing for your baby.My heart goes out to you.Please feel free to come back here anytime.We know the pain you are in because all of us here are going thur that same pain.It is intense but time does make it better.Take care and may God bless you.Sincerely,Renee (Sox's mom)