Two weeks ago today at this time I was holding my darling Furry's head & waiting for the Vet to come to end her pain. And 30 minutes from now all the life had gone from her. I know that she is at peace, but I don't have any religous faith so it makes it harder to find comfort. But through my tears I suddenly realised that I was so fortunate to be here to comfort her right at the end & I'm sure that she knew I was with her at the last. Even though those are horrible memories it would have been terrible not to be here.
If it had been the next day I would have been at work, & may have been too far away to get back to say goodbye to her. My husband would have been here with her but it wouldn't have been the same. I always said we were joined at both hips!
The roses are in bloom on her grave & the softness of the petals reminds of her silky soft ears, so every morning I stroke them as I used to stroke hers.
R.I.P. Dearest Furry Furskin.

Dear Furry's Mom,

remember the anguish of reliving those last hours of Spike's life....at the 1-week anniversary, the 2nd and third...then on the same day each month. Aug 23 will mark his 3-month anniversary, and I still cry every day over losing my very best friend.

The horrible memories will take a while go to away, which is a little confusing...or maybe unfair is the word I'm looking for. Spike and I were together for 14 years, and only during his last six months did his ill health decline at a rapid pace. It seems so logical that I should remember all of the good times, yet the last days, hours and minutes are the easiest to recall and the hardest to dismiss.

All we can do is what you are already instinctively doing...try to balance the pain with gratitude. I woke up this morning with tears in my eyes and sadness in my heart. Going back to sleep was impossible, so I switched on the TV and, without even selecting a channel, I caught the last 10 minutes of the perfect sermon by Joel Osteen, my favorite religious TV personality. He was telling me that, while I cannot prevent negative feelings and emotions from surfacing, I can definitely choose how I respond to them.

Shortly after Spike's death I came upon a saying in a greeting card that I adapted into a little prayer. Whenever sadness threatened to overwhelm me, I would repeat....."Rather than mourn the absence of Spikey's flame, let me rejoice that it burned so brightly for so long". This would always bring me back to a place of gratitude, reminding me how blessed I am to have had this precious light in my life.

Withing you peace today....

Juanita.....Loving Mom of Spike

Dear Juanita,
Thank you for responding so quickly to my message - your reply gave me comfort at a very low time. I have read how much you love your Spike & know I am not alone.
Judith