Our beautiful German Shepherd died last night. I guess it was just her time. She was never sick, never infirm. Today was just like every other day. We brought all the dogs inside twice today when it rained, and she was just fine. After the rain was over, the dogs went back out. Sissy ate all her food and settled down for a nap in the sun, and she was still there when my son went out to bring the dogs in for the night. It was later than usual, and I wondered why the dogs weren't barking to come in - Sissy always knew when it was time to come in for the night.

My husband got a body bag from work (he's a funeral director) and our lovely girl is in the garage sealed in the bag. Every time one of the neighbor dogs bark, I think it's her. I keep wanting to go out to the garage and check, even though I know she's really dead. And I don't know what to do with her now. We just moved to a really small town from the city. In the city, I'd know where to go and what to do, but I don't know what to do here. I want to have her cremated and keep her ashes, but I don't know where to go.

One of my other two dogs is the same age as Sissy, and I am so scared that we'll lose Penny now, too. I don't think I can bear it. When the rest of our girls are gone, I don't think I want any more dogs. This is just too hard. My son is devastated. We got Sissy before he was two years old - he doesn't remember a life without her, and it breaks my heart that he had to be the one to find her dead.

I know she was old, and I know I should be grateful that she went so peacefully and naturally, but I had no idea that it would hurt so much to lose her.

Dear Mmholt,

I am so very sorry for you. I wish there were words to ease the pain, but if you read the items posted on this forum, you will learn that the pain may not dissapear, but al the same the words from others who feel the same can give you great comfort. It did a lot of good to me.

It's a terrible thing, loosing your furry friend and I can imagine that your son is also devastated. Give yourself time to grief. I think your Sissy just knew it was time for her, however dreadful that is for us who stay behind.

I had my dog cremated as well, I felt it was my duty to give Guinny a good fare-well like that, like we would do with humans, and again, it did not ease my pain but it felt right and I got to see him one more time (he had left from living to being dead in the vet's car in less than 10 minutes and the emptiness I felt those terrible first days were just unbearable).
Perhaps you can contact a vet in your vicinity, he or she should know where you can go to say goodbye to Sissy.

I wish you a lot of strenght.

Essy

Dear MMHOLT, I am so sorry for your loss. I had my beloved 11 year old mini schnauzer, Fritz, put to sleep two weeks ago yesterday and my heart is most definitely broken. Fritz taught me so much more then I taught him. I got him from a rescue and thought that he needed me, but I was wrong...it was me that needed him.

I am unsure of your location, but if you click on the website: http://www.aplb.org, you should find a list of resources for cremation based on your state.

Also, there is a children's book by Cynthia Rylant called, "Dog Heaven" that might help with your son. I first read it in the vet's office and ordered a copy for myself from half.com. It is very sweet, simple and comforting.

Again, I am so sorry for your loss.
Tracey

Thanks, everyone. I called a vet, and they were able to give me the number of a pet crematory about 35 miles away. That was such a long drive - I'm so glad my husband was able to come with me. The whole way there, I kept thinking of how much Sissy liked to ride in the car. We picked out a red urn for her ashes - her collars & leashes have always been red.

We always said that we'd do the right thing and have our girl put down when she got too old or ill to be happy. In my heart, I know it is a gift from God and our good girl that we didn't have to make that decision. She never was ill or crippled, just a little stiff in the mornings. She could still see and hear and she had all of her teeth. I know she had a good appetite up to the very end, since her bowl was empty. We weren't with her when she died, but I don't think she struggled at all - she looked like she was napping in her sunny spot, except the sun had gone down hours before. I know I should be grateful, but oh, to have just one more day. Even 5 more minutes, just to say goodbye. Oh Sissy, mia Sissita - I miss you so much, and it hasn't even been a whole day yet.