Siren was a stray cat I took in six years ago. she has been a very loving cat. She rubs up against everyone, even the dogs. She was calm and happy and purred often. Saturday she got a cold and seemed miserable, so I bought some Vicks for the humidifier and promised to take her to the vet on Monday.

She was so weak by the time I got her to the vet. The vet kept her overnight on an IV. When he took a blood sample from her she stopped breathing and he had to give her a shot to get her breathing again. That was the longest night of my life (or so I thought.) The next day at work the vet called and told me she had feline leukemia and her white blood cells and potassium were sky high and that I "should let her go." I didn't understand what he was saying at first, but then it hit me like a bus.

I left work and asked me husband to come home so we could go to the vet and say our goodbyes. She didn't look much like her oldself, but I could still feel her personality shinning through. I scratched her everywhere she likes to be scratched but still no purring, I knew then that it was her time to go.

The only blessing what the putting her down seemed to cause her no difficulty. Not even a cough or a surprising yelp like I expected, but the shot just put her into a deep sleep and then she was dead. It took less than one minute.

I stayed in bed for the next 36 hours crying. Sadness is exhausting. It still doesn't seem real. She was so young. She was an indoor cat and the vet told me she probably had leukemia since the day I brought her into our home.

I lost my loving dog Lady one year ago this month and this website helped get me through that. Thank you everyone. I am hoping I can get through this as well. But I find that with each death I lose a little bit of myself and my ability to love others. I have two dogs and a cat still alive at home, that I can barely scratch because I just envision the day that I will lose them.

I hope we all get through our grief in one piece,
Becky

Becky, I'm so sorry for your loss!

Siren had the blessing of spending her last 6 years with you!! And her passing was peaceful... but I know you miss her SO much.

if it's any consolation, you'll be reunited, when it's your time to pass. in the meantime, siren is in no distress or pain, and she and Lady are together.

Love,

kathy

[/QUOTE]But I find that with each death I lose a little bit of myself and my ability to love others[QUOTE]

I understand this i really do, your trying to protect yourself from further hurt, but its ok to hurt, shows your alive and loving, the trick is to ride out the pain and be a better and stronger person at the end of it.

I know its hard and words are easy to say, but please dont close your heart off.

Love Sue