Hi...I just found this site and need some words of encouragement. Last night my cat TJ died in my arms. He has been my best friend for the last 22 years. My husband got him for me right after our honeymoon at the animal shelter. He has been with me for all the milestones of my life including the birth of my children. I had TJ longer than my son. TJ was diagnosed with CRF in March. I started giving him Sub-Q therapy on a regular basis along with Gaviscon. Last Monday I took him to the vet because he was getting weak...diagnosed with anemia as I suspected. He was started on Winstrol and seemed to be improving. However, over the weekend something seemed to change. He was extremely tired but still eating small amounts. I spent all weekend and all day Monday with him lying on the couch comforting him. If I would get up to get something he would lift his head to see where I was. He didn't seem to be in pain and wanted to be held. Last night at 9:25 as I was holding him...he looked up at me...took a few last breaths...and was gone. This morning we buried him in my flower garden near the deck that he loved to lie on. I can't believe that he is gone. I knew the time was near and I had him a very long time but it hurts so bad! How am I going to cope?

Lisa...NOAH'S ARK

It doesn't matter how long we have with our loved ones, when their time comes it is always difficult.

Time will ease your pain, but in the meantime try to dwell on all the wonderful moments you shared. The cuddles, purrs and playtimes

And remember that in the end, you were the last living being that he saw.

Hi Lisa,

I am so sorry to hear about your beloved Tj and I know that it hurts greatly. It is never easy to lose them even when we know they have had a great life and I know this from my own lost back last September when I lost my old boy Smokey after 17 great years. I still miss him, as I am writing I am wiping away the tears, and I know that he will always be in my heart and soul. Every one deals with this in their own way and for me, not having Smokey to take care of made things harder for me and so, shortly after I lost him, I adopted 2 kitties to take care of. It doesn't take the pain away it just makes things a little easier, for me , to deal with. Just know that it will get better, never goes away completely, but it does get better. The other thing that helps me, is believing that my boys are waiting for me at rainbow bridge and one day we will all be reunited and I will be whole once again. Take care of you and take what ever time you need to heal. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

LouAnn Needham
Mother to: Jacob (passed), Smokey (passed) Ziggy, Quinton, Tyler & BobCat

Thank you both for replying to my message...I was afraid no one would. I used to be a member of another board called purr-fect paws...but that board no longer exists. All of us members had become very close. I think I have found another caring and understanding board. My heartfelt sympathy to you both on your losses. It sure is hard going through this. Even though I have 4 other cats, 2 dogs and 2 rabbits does not make it any easier. Muffin...another one of my cats who is 19 was diagnosed with cancer in April...one month after TJ was diagnosed with CRF. So I am also dealing with that. It's so joyful having furry friends until they get sick and we lose them.

Thanks and hugs to you both...
Lisa...NOAH'S ARK

How blessed you are to have TJ for 22 years! You were such a good mom to him. Of course, 122 years would not be long with such a precious friend. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Helena

Thursday is my birthday...a birthday that I have celebrated with TJ for the last 22 years. I told my family that there is to be no cake, gifts or anything this year. How can I celebrate my birthday when my baby is gone. I feel terrible...all of you are also going through such intense grief...that I'm finding it hard to write about TJ and ask for help. Please forgive me if I seem selfish. My heart really goes out to all of you. At 9:25pm tonight...it was 24 hours that TJ passed away. I can't stop counting the hours. One minute I seem fine and able to cope...the next minute I'm crying like a baby.

Lisa...NOAH'S ARK

Dear Lisa,

TJ sounds like such a wonderful friend and companion. You were both so lucky to have shared each other's lives for 22 years! Wow!

Whether we have our furbabies for 2 months, or 2 years, or 22 years, it just never seems long enough.

What you're experiencing right now is very normal. I remember the first week after both Shiloh and Hobbie died. I counted hours, then I counted weeks, then months. As time passes you'll find that your pain will heal. You'll still have days when you miss TJ to your absolute core, but as time passes you'll also find that the wonderful memories you have of TJ will bring you comfort.

In these first days and weeks I think it's important to express your thoughts and saddness. This is a wonderful forum, with caring people who will embrace you and your grief.

The most important thing you can do for yourself right now is to give yourself time and space to grieve and heal.

You and TJ are in my thoughts.
Hugs,
Kathleen

I know exactly how you feel. One second I'm fine, I keep thinking "it's okay, you have a modeling job to look forward to, it's your senior year, it'll all be fine" and then the next second I start bawling and find myself grabbing my bottle of Aderol ( for my ADHD) to keep me from getting depressed

Its really hard since the pain is so raw ( we lost Midnight yesterday after 12 years) but we are all here to support you and support each other. Thats the way we all cope with greif is to talk about out furbabies and help others greive with a loving and supporting community.

All of my love and prayers,
Norko

Hi Lisa, I'm so sorry for your loss. I felt very sad for you when I read what you wrote about TJ. He sounds like a truly beautiful spirit. Its great that you had so many blessed years with him, but I know it doesn't take the pain away. --He is/was your baby after all.
Its such a horrible time to go through--I know. I'm suffering the loss of my precious Angel, who I had for 5 wonderful years, and who I lost very, very tragically last Saturday to an accident.
Its completely ok to write about your own personal experience, its, after all on your mind nearly all the time --you have to talk about it to be able to heal, I think, in time.
I also have to relate to your counting the hours (and days). Last night was my one 1 week mark. Last weeks Tuesday was when I last saw my baby alive, he came to my brother's bed as I sat there --needed an evening cuddle. He looked into my eyes lovingly one last time before I had to leave to go to my own place. (My 2 cats were in the care of my mother for July, now I only have 1 to take home with me )
I remembered it suddenly as I was going to sleep. Needless to say, I was crying hysterically, and couldn't fall asleep. I then remember that he died alone, possibly in terrible pain... and I have a lot of difficulty forgiving myself for not being more careful to tell people to keep the windows and door shut.
I don't know if I can write more, feeling miserable...

many hugs and strength, to deal,
-Anna

Hi, Lisa - I wanted to respond because you left such a nice post for me yesterday (mine was the post about losing our Bubba Jack last Thursday to CRF). I know exactly how you feel....i really do!
I got Jack when i was 19 years old, and he has been with me through all of my adult life!! He saw me through happiness, sadness, new apartments, new roommates, new cities (he even rode on a plane right under my feet when i moved out of state!) He met my husband with me (which was one of the greatest things for me because he FINALLY had a daddy!!), he planned a wedding with me......he was even AT the wedding! Every memory I have from 19 years old to now somehow includes him. He was truely a part of my heart and my soul. And now.....i feel like part of my heart and soul are missing. It's so hard to cope, i know. It's only been 6 days since Jack left, and every minute is a struggle. But....for the first time i woke up this morning and instead of visions of him sick or flashes of that terrible day last Thursday coming into my head....i had an immediate recollection of back when he was a kitten and i had several friends over at my apartment.....and Jack came trotting out of my bedroom to greet all of our visitors with my wonderbra in his mouth! I found myself laughing like i haven't laughed in weeks!!! It was a wonderful feeling.

I know it's still so close to losing our babies.....but as time goes on, with some amazing graces, we'll be able to only think of all the wonderful things. Even the things our babies did that drove us nuts will become blessings. I have to believe that, because i had a small glimpse of it this morning. Just give yourself all the time you need to grieve, and try and focus on those AMAZING 22 years!!!! That's how they stay alive in our hearts and our souls. And don't forget.....your are not alone.

lots of hugs and good wishes
-Vikki :>) aka unagirl

Hi Lisa,

I know today must be very hard for you, as I know that when I lost Smokey back in September, I had a very hard time with my birthday, in November, and with Christmas. I always have loved going shopping for Christmas gifts, but this past one it was like 4 days before that I finally did my shopping, and it wasn't much fun. It has almost been a year and I don't cry every day now, but it does tend to get you right when you don't expect it.

Just know that you have people hear to talk to and they do understand what you are going through. Take care and come back as often as you need to.

LouAnn
Mother to: Jacob (passed), Smokey (passed) Ziggy, Quinton, Tyler & BobCat

LouAnn...thank you for thinking of me today. It is a very rough day. I wanted to drive to the mountains today but I'm having car trouble so I was afraid to make the trip. It's a brand new car...just my luck!
Hope things are getting better for you also.

Lisa...NOAH'S ARK