I had to make the MOST difficult decision of my life on June 15 2005.....I had my little love put to sleep.
Oh God, how I miss her....she was my best friend. When we meet again, I hope she knows I did this out of pure love for her and a bit of me died with her. I knew this day would come, and I knew it would be hard, but not like this. I have never cried this much...my eyes hurt. My heart is broken. I loved Tomi so much and wish I could have her back. Even as I sit here to write this I am crying for you baby.
Please know I loved you very much...you brought me such joy. I miss your talking and even your begging. I think about you sleeping in the sink, getting a drink of water from the shower and of you putting your paw across my hand while you would sleep on me. I miss your beautiful little face.
After 20 years with you, I feel as though my right arm is missing. I see something move, and look to see if it is you, and then I remember and another bout of tears come.
Tomi, please know I loved you and that you are greatly missed.
Love you baby

I'm so sorry to learn of your Tomi's passing. LS is a wonderful site with lots of people that really care and understand what you're going through. The first days are the worst. It's been three and a half months since I lost Qorqui and I still think I see her now and then, or feel her bang against the end of the bed at night.

You may want post something in the "Death and Dying Support" section as there seems to be a lot more people active there and you will get better response to your posts. I don't know how I would have made it through the first week without the wonderful people here.

How lucky you were to have had 20 years with Tomi. I'm certain she knows how much you love her.

Take care of yourself,
Tim