I just got done watching the "Rainbow bridge" clip again and was once again overcome with emotion. I miss my Sasha so much right now, I am sick to my stomach . I feel like my pain gets worse instead of better with time. I look at each day as one day closer to when I get to see her again, but it is also one day further from the last time I got to hold her and that scares me. I am so scared that I will forget her. I know I could never forget her, but forget the little things about her...how she felt...how she smelled...how her sweet bark sounded when she got so excited to see me come home. I can't stand to think of how long it might be before I see her again. I'm only 30 years old. How can I go through another 50 years, or so, without her? I can't bear to think about it. If it weren't for my little girl (who was born at the same time we lost Sasha) I would just want to die. Sometimes I wonder if Sasha didn't hold out for my little girl to come because she knew I would feel that way.
I also wonder if someone can offer some words about another subject that I think about alot. Although I have experienced the loss of the 2 family pets we had growing up, Sasha is the only pet that was truly mine that I have lost (I've had her since I was 13 years old!) What happens, in say my parents case, where they have loved and lost so many pets during their lifetime. Are they all there waiting on them? I guess that brings me to the part that I struggle with. I love animals so much and can't picture life without them, but I don't want to take anything away from Sasha by making her share me with all these other animals when I finally get to see her again. { I know that probably sounds rediculous, thank God you all don't know who I am or you would probably have me committed !} I really do think about that though. I love her that much~that I would sacrifice never having another animal~so that she can be an only child for eternity. Does anyone else ever think about that or should I seek the advice of a shrink ? I am so glad that you all are here....there is no way I could talk about such things through any other means and I appreciate it .
Your friend in grief,
Kim

Kim,

Oh, just read your post and I hurt for you. Kim.... she lived such a long full life. Most dogs don't get to have what she did.
You will always love her, but she is in God's hands now. What wonderful hands to be in. I know that this sounds like words from a hallmark card........but if you relect on it, it helps.

I know that in just the short time I lost my Anna Mae I can make myself cry. I guess you can say I can bring myself to the place of sorrow if I chose. Other times it just comes on without asking. I can take her stuffed animal and smell her sent and make myself cry terrible. I can read sad poems and weep tears till they actually run dry. But when I do those things, I also am conscience that I am the one chosing to do that. I know that nothing I can say... nothing I can do.... and no amount of heartfelt tears will alter what is. I am trying very hard to accept what I cannot change and leave it in God's hands......hands that come from a power beyond our imagination. I have to leave it somewhere. Taking care of my Anna Mae is now in His job discription, not mine. I have no choice in the matter. Besides... where else do I go to put such hope? There is no vet, doctor, celebrity or man on earth that can care or love what I can't "right now" Only our maker. He is the giver of life. Not just the creator of objects....but the creator of life itself. It comes from Him and returns to Him. What better care can she be in than with the one who created her. He is the one that knows cats, dogs.. and all the beasts of the earth. He knows all their needs. He made them to need us...and he made us to be in charge of his animal creation.

I know God has promised to do away with death and has promised that there will once again be peace amongst the animals.
Here is His promise:
Revelation 21:4
"He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death, mourning or crying or pain,
for the old order of things has passed away."

Isaiah 11:6
"The wolf will live with the lamb,
the leopard will lie down with the goat,
the calf and the lion and the yearling tothether.

and a little child will lead them.
The cow will feed with the bear.
Their young will lie down together,
and the lion will eat straw like the ox.

The infant will play near the hole of the cobra,
and the young child put his hand into the viper's nest.
They will neither harm nor destroy on ALL my holy mountain,
for the earth will be full if the knowlege of the Lord
as the waters cover the sea."

Isn't that an awesome picture. Sounds a like rainbow bridge!!

Sometimes we feel we should grieve and suffer terrible heartache and pain because we feel responsible. We want to feel all the pain they felt as we feel quilty that we are alright and we perceive them to not be. But we aren't responsible. We are not the cause...we have done nothing wrong but love and be kind and God knows that. He knows the hearts of men and knows our sorrow.

As far as loving more than one....
I am not sure if you have children. I have three and love them ALL equally and very much. When I had my first, I could not comprehend loving another. The whole time I was pregnant I use to worry that I would not love the second as much as my first. But...gosh.... after it was born, I could see that I loved my new child just as much. The same with my third. Ask a mother that has had 8, 9 or 10 children and she would tell you that she would lay her life down for anyone of them. Love is not a commodity that can run in short supply. It doesn't get used up. It is always there... and enough for everyone. You'll see.

So thru your tears always keep your faith and hope. We may not understand all the woes that befall us, but all we need to do is throw our burdens to God and he gives us peace till we experience His kingdom.
1Peter 5:7
"Let Him have all your worries and cares, for He is always thinking about you and watching
everything that concerns you."
Know I love ya girl,
Golden

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{KIM}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Just a note to tell you that you are not going off any deep ends or anything wondering about the many pets at the rainbow bridge. I tend to think that our "physicality" might not be the same as it is here --for lack of better words--"on the other side". Somehow it seems that all souls and life merge only to break away and merge again ..like great gusts of energy, we are all the same and all connected in death and in life--breaking away and merging again, breathing together --stirring up sunshine and rain. Imagine your beautiful dog and my splendid cat--together as I write this ...so beautiful and young again--feeling nothing but wonderful heavenly romping bliss! Whatever "form" they take I feel so confident that they are in a SPECIAL place! People go on and on about people going to heaven..to get a reward at the end of their lives--certainly there is as good a place for our animals who were always without words but went places with us where words can't go! Those who are remembered in the hearts of their families never truly die.
My heart goes out to you. Don't worry about feeling like you are going looney. We all did at first.

Kim,

You're not crazy -- I had to smile when I read that, I really know the feeling!

The first week our kitty disappeared, I was SO angry with God. How could God send this wonderful creature into our lives and then take him away when he had shown us so much about love? It seemed like the joy had been sucked out of our lives. So I go from anger to thanks -- that our kitty came into our lives and taught us so much about love, compassion, etc. Before he wandered into our driveway and adopted us, we had every excuse not to have a pet! But we fell completely in love with his little spirit. We adopted 2 kittens from the SPCA, not to replace our baby but in away, as a tribute to him. I don't think loving one pet takes away from loving another. But you will decide when you're ready.

I have to believe that I will see loved ones, including my kitty, in heaven. I even pray that human relatives who have passed will "find" our baby and take care of him. In heaven, we have unlimited time, unlimited love...more than enough for every pet we have ever loved and ever will love again.

jane

Dear Kim,

I know exactly what you're talking about...I've had that same thought. I've often thought, there are just so many of them all over the world...how can ALL of them have a special place in God's kingdom? But they DO! Every single one of them! That is the magnitude of God's grace and glory. He creates so much love and so many special creatures who are all unique and wonderful, and it will all be perfected and realized when we go to Heaven. You could have had 100 furbabies already on Earth and they would all be loved immensely by God, and by us too when our day comes to join them. Because to me that's what Heaven must be all about...LOVE!



I believe that when we go to Heaven we will instantly be given the ability to love unconditionally and constantly and comprehensively (got that?), just as our Heavenly Father always loves us.

I know how much Sasha means to you and how much you miss her. But keep believing. Because one day it will be realized, we will understand, and it will all be worth it.

Love,
Jenny

Kim,

I was thinking about how sad you were the other day.... and just wanted you to know that I was thinking about you.
I read your posts and you are so special in the way you reach out to other people.
Hope you are doing OK
love Golden

Kim, I cannot say more than then the others have. My 1 month loss of my Abby just came on 5-28.

As you think many think you would be crazy, I guess I may feel the same way. I started watching a religious program probably about the beginning of this year. I generally don't go for the televised programs, but I really did seem to enjoy this one. Probably about 2 months before Abby passed, for several weeks, they actually talked about animals in heaven, and that God would welcome them.

As I await to see my Abby again, remembering this did make me feel better, knowing that I would one day see her again, and that she is in a better place now.

Don't ever think you are silly for your thoughts. It's better to express them.

I'm sure Sasha is awaiting you with open paws. If you choose to take on another baby, I don't think there will be any unwelcome feelings. I do have a kitten that was brought home before Abby passed, but he doesn't take the place, even though I still do love the little critter. He is something else!

I believe our hearts have room for love for many.