I have been looking in on this site for quite some time, but this is my first post. I must admit I have been doing my posting on another site, and although they are truly wonderful there, there just isn't much activity there.
No one around me, although they try, really understands my depth of pain, and I really need someone who does. As I am sure many people here do, I feel like I have lost a child. I had my German Shepherd, Sasha, for 16 wonderful years. Other than being a little stiff on cold days she was perfectly healthy for 15 of those years. My family always joked that she would outlive all of us! Well, in her 16th year,her age caught up with her and the arthritis got pretty bad. We tried every drug on the market and even went way over the recommended dose there toward the end (we knew at that point we had nothing to lose), but even that was not helping anymore. I guess it was so hard because everyone says that they will "tell" you when they are ready. Sasha didn't. She still had an appetite, still showed as much joy and excitement to see me as ever, and even still squeaked a toy every now and then. The thing is, her hips had gotten so weak, when she would walk her feet would drag, and sometimes her back end would just fall under her. She couldn't stand for very long before her back end would start to slowly sink towards the floor. She was having a hard time gettting up and down and had to be in pain, but never showed me any signs, so I continued to be in denial. Well, one day I came home and she was sprawled out on the kitchen floor shaking and panting. She must have been trying to get a drink or something to eat and her hips must have given out. She didn't have enough strength in them to to get her traction on the tile floor and had just exhausted herself trying. I immediately got her up and onto the carpet where I just held her and broke down from the reality check. It was too much for me to see her like that. Knowing how scared she must have been. I asked my husband (who had been with me for 13 of those 16 years of Sashas life) if he thought she was ready to go. He looked at me and said "She has been ready, it's you that needed time". I want to believe she was ready. She went very peacefully when we had her euthanized. She was laying with her head in my lap, and although I know from her shaking that she knew what was happenning, she was very brave. I hate to think she was scared, but my husband said as smart and aware as she was of things, he was sure she knew what was happenning ,and,like any of us would be, was just nervous about the unknown, but not scared. I can only pray he is right. I did what I thought was best for her, but I will always wonder if there was something else we could have tried or done. It haunts me, since she never did show any signs of being unhappy in life, that I did it too soon.If I did do it too soon, does she forgive me.?. I hate to think that she is wondering why I did that to her, wondering what she did wrong for me to do that to her. Even after 10 months it is so painful. She was THAT dog. You know the one that comes along once in a lifetime? We all have them I think. The one that will always outshine the rest and hold a special place in our hearts forever. She was my canine soulmate, and I am forever changed by her.
Sasha's tribute http://www.in-memory-of-pets.com/personalt...te.asp?ID=49686
I would also like to share this beautiful animated version of "Rainbow Bridge"--A real tear jerker- http://www.indigo.org/rainbowbridge_ver2.html
Thanks to all for taking the time to read this.
Your friend in grief,
Kim
Full Version: 10 Months And Still Guilty
Kim,
This is also my first post, and I just spent about 30 minutes replying to you, and managed to somehow lose it before I got it posted. Sigh.
I just want you to know that I recently faced the same dilemma you had to. I was owned by a 13 year old, 100 lb. ball of love. The best damn Golden Retriever ever. The best DOG ever, if you ask me.
He also suffered from severe arthritis, and had been on supplements and Ascriptin for years. It was later discovered that he also suffered from a degenerative neurological syndrome, also, and was losing control of his rear end. I want you to know that I tried EVERYTHING (short of surgery, I didn't think he would recover) to keep him here with me, and I feel like I waited a little too long to let him go. I think no matter what your cir%%stances, the second guessing rips your heart apart. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. At the end, my boy could not walk. For his last three days, he couldn't get outside, couldn't go to the bathroom by himself, and he was incontinent in the house. He was a VERY proud dog, and I have to believe that humiliated him. You saved her from that. You were there for her for 16 years, and you were there for her up until the very end. I really believe there is "that" dog for all of us, and I also believe that they KNOW they are that special dog.
A friend told me that he believes that when I put my boy "to sleep", that he thought he was just lying down for a nap on the floor with me (I had it done at home), and he thinks he's still there. For some reason, that really helps me. I hope it helps you. If faced with the same dilemma again, I would do it sooner, rather than later. You made the right choice for her.
Take care,
Lynn and Taylor (at the bridge)
This is also my first post, and I just spent about 30 minutes replying to you, and managed to somehow lose it before I got it posted. Sigh.
I just want you to know that I recently faced the same dilemma you had to. I was owned by a 13 year old, 100 lb. ball of love. The best damn Golden Retriever ever. The best DOG ever, if you ask me.
He also suffered from severe arthritis, and had been on supplements and Ascriptin for years. It was later discovered that he also suffered from a degenerative neurological syndrome, also, and was losing control of his rear end. I want you to know that I tried EVERYTHING (short of surgery, I didn't think he would recover) to keep him here with me, and I feel like I waited a little too long to let him go. I think no matter what your cir%%stances, the second guessing rips your heart apart. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. At the end, my boy could not walk. For his last three days, he couldn't get outside, couldn't go to the bathroom by himself, and he was incontinent in the house. He was a VERY proud dog, and I have to believe that humiliated him. You saved her from that. You were there for her for 16 years, and you were there for her up until the very end. I really believe there is "that" dog for all of us, and I also believe that they KNOW they are that special dog.A friend told me that he believes that when I put my boy "to sleep", that he thought he was just lying down for a nap on the floor with me (I had it done at home), and he thinks he's still there. For some reason, that really helps me. I hope it helps you. If faced with the same dilemma again, I would do it sooner, rather than later. You made the right choice for her.
Take care,
Lynn and Taylor (at the bridge)
Kim--
As someone who has also lost a beloved pet you need to know you are NOT alone. The guilt and "what if's" will tear you apart if you let them. It sounds like you were a wonderful owner who devoted 16 years to making sure your baby was loved and protected. In the end, you gave that dog the ultimate gift - letting him go with dignity. There is no shame due you for that. I really do believe that many animals hold on beyond their time simply because they don't think their owners can face life without them yet. They hold on until WE'RE ready ( as if that's ever truly possible) to be strong enough to let them go. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Please picture your beloved baby in a better place, free of the pain of arthritis, running and playing - just waiting for you to join him.
Sincerely,
Terri
As someone who has also lost a beloved pet you need to know you are NOT alone. The guilt and "what if's" will tear you apart if you let them. It sounds like you were a wonderful owner who devoted 16 years to making sure your baby was loved and protected. In the end, you gave that dog the ultimate gift - letting him go with dignity. There is no shame due you for that. I really do believe that many animals hold on beyond their time simply because they don't think their owners can face life without them yet. They hold on until WE'RE ready ( as if that's ever truly possible) to be strong enough to let them go. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Please picture your beloved baby in a better place, free of the pain of arthritis, running and playing - just waiting for you to join him.
Sincerely,
Terri
Lynnn
My husband always says " you second guess yourself that it was too soon, yet if you had waited for her to get to the point she was suffering without question, you would never forgive yourself." So I guess your right...damned if you do,damned if you don't. I'm very sorry that you had to deal with this, too. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.
My Sasha was a very prideful and dignified lady, so I know it would have been her worst nightmare if she couldn't go outside to potty. I'm sure your baby was the same way and you have that knowledge to feel sure you did the right thing. It is so selfish of me to think that if I would have waited until that point it would have been easier....but can it ever be "easier"? Thanks for caring.
My husband always says " you second guess yourself that it was too soon, yet if you had waited for her to get to the point she was suffering without question, you would never forgive yourself." So I guess your right...damned if you do,damned if you don't. I'm very sorry that you had to deal with this, too. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.
My Sasha was a very prideful and dignified lady, so I know it would have been her worst nightmare if she couldn't go outside to potty. I'm sure your baby was the same way and you have that knowledge to feel sure you did the right thing. It is so selfish of me to think that if I would have waited until that point it would have been easier....but can it ever be "easier"? Thanks for caring.
Oh Kim.... my heart goes out to you hon! last week i had my baby Pretty Girl put to rest after being hit by a car, which was an accident from a door being left open. it killed me, and even though she was at deaths door i still carry the guilt for not letting them operate. i didn't care of the cost, this was my girl! my most loving pet the one that caputured my heart and pains my soul now that she's gone.
i could not be in the room with her, because seeing her hurting tore me up as it was. you were brave to be there in sashas last moments. i carry guilt from leaving her alone with the vet in her last moments.
you did the right thing, her body gave out and she could not go on the way she was, it would only have gotten worse then your guilt you feel would be even more trying on your heart and soul. i had a dog growing up that was our favorite. his name was boggey and he was half german shepard and half coyote, yep i said it right 1/2 coyote........ he was 16 same age as my older brother at the time, when we put him to rest. everything you said tugged at my heart because he did the same thing. his hips would go out from under him and he would try to go outside to take care of business and leave a mess cause he could not walk. he had about 3 heart attacks and we had to lift his hips so he could walk. it was heartbreaking but we come to realize that he was 112 yrs old. he had a great life. our dogs are now running and playing and have brand new bodies with no ailments whatsoever. set free your guilt Kim~ you have done no wrong, you gave your dogs life back, i am sure sasha is very thankful and greatful to you for sending her to a life with no pain?.... sasha understands you did the right thing as pretty girl understands i did the right thing for her as well. grieving with you,
~lori~ heartbroken1
i could not be in the room with her, because seeing her hurting tore me up as it was. you were brave to be there in sashas last moments. i carry guilt from leaving her alone with the vet in her last moments.
you did the right thing, her body gave out and she could not go on the way she was, it would only have gotten worse then your guilt you feel would be even more trying on your heart and soul. i had a dog growing up that was our favorite. his name was boggey and he was half german shepard and half coyote, yep i said it right 1/2 coyote........ he was 16 same age as my older brother at the time, when we put him to rest. everything you said tugged at my heart because he did the same thing. his hips would go out from under him and he would try to go outside to take care of business and leave a mess cause he could not walk. he had about 3 heart attacks and we had to lift his hips so he could walk. it was heartbreaking but we come to realize that he was 112 yrs old. he had a great life. our dogs are now running and playing and have brand new bodies with no ailments whatsoever. set free your guilt Kim~ you have done no wrong, you gave your dogs life back, i am sure sasha is very thankful and greatful to you for sending her to a life with no pain?.... sasha understands you did the right thing as pretty girl understands i did the right thing for her as well. grieving with you,
~lori~ heartbroken1
Dear Kim,
I'm so sorry about the loss of your precious Sasha. I looked at the web-page you set up. She was such a beautiful girl. I have a 3 year old female German Shepherd, who is for me THAT dog so your post touched me very deeply.
As the others have said, please don't feel guilty at all. You gave Sasha a wonderful, long life and absolutely did the right thing at the end. She knew you were there for her and how much you loved her. Don't doubt that for a second. I also think that for those who can't stay with their pets during the euthanasia process, that's OK too. I've had 2 other dogs and I couldn't bring myself to be with either of them at the very end.
Again, my sympathy to you and your husband. My thoughts are with you.
That Rainbow Bridge site you posted..... Each time I see it, the tears just flow. We all must believe that our precious pets are in a place quite like that, just waiting for us.
Sincerely,
Lynn
I'm so sorry about the loss of your precious Sasha. I looked at the web-page you set up. She was such a beautiful girl. I have a 3 year old female German Shepherd, who is for me THAT dog so your post touched me very deeply.
As the others have said, please don't feel guilty at all. You gave Sasha a wonderful, long life and absolutely did the right thing at the end. She knew you were there for her and how much you loved her. Don't doubt that for a second. I also think that for those who can't stay with their pets during the euthanasia process, that's OK too. I've had 2 other dogs and I couldn't bring myself to be with either of them at the very end.
Again, my sympathy to you and your husband. My thoughts are with you.
That Rainbow Bridge site you posted..... Each time I see it, the tears just flow. We all must believe that our precious pets are in a place quite like that, just waiting for us.
Sincerely,
Lynn
My heart goes out to you ~ it is the worst thing in this world that I have ever experienced to have to make that decision about my pets, because my ultimate goal is to protect them forever ~ and I know (but never wanted to admit) that is not possible when there is a serious illness that has reached the incurable stage ~ however I do think that we have protected our sweet babes so innocent and pure, from the indignity and suffering that would have been the inevitable end ~ In a selfless act of love ~ we move forward to take away the pain and surround them with a cloud of that golden love that forever binds our spirits together ~ and transform in a spiritually powerful way. One thing that I have learned over the past months is to be open to the intangible ~ they who have left us in earthly form are there behind the veil ~ I have felt this ~ we are all guided by the grace of God to find them if we can just be open to the way of the intuitive and enter that cloud of unknowing where we can then be healed. May you have the grace of healing and be filled with love ~ this is what I hope for ~ this is what springs forth in the darkest night of my grief ~ I am so sorry for your loss ~ Sincere Comfort and Thoughts, Kathryn
Kim,
It is by far the hardest thing I have ever done. I second guessed myself for the first month thinking I did it too soon ... if only I could find the right drug, if only he "felt" a little better surely he could walk again, etc. Taylor had other problems aside from the mobility issue, he had an enlarged heart, an enlarged liver, and some mysterious infection that multiple antibiotics wouldn't touch, and they suspected he had laryngeal paralysis, but everything else got him before I could even begin to confront that. I felt that if we could just get that under control he would get up again, eat again, wag his tail again. But that didn't happen, and I felt like I was letting him down. That it was up to ME to make him better ... and I had failed him. But, the cold hard reality is that they just don't live long enough. That to make him stay around in that state was not being his friend. It has completely devastated me, but it freed him.
And, now, I second guess myself for waiting as long as I did. I force myself to think about it, &%^yze it, try to figure out what I was thinking, etc. ... I go from "how could I do that to him?" to "how could I make him live like that?" ... it's a roller coaster I'm sure you're familiar with. Your husband knows you well ... any way it happens, you feel like you could have, should have, done something different. How can you not when you love them so much, and they can't tell us what they're feeling. You loved her for 16 years, and I have to believe you knew her very well, and made your decision accordingly. I hate hate hate hate what I did. But I did it for him, and you can find comfort (hopefully) that you did what you did for HER, and that's exactly what you should have done.
Lynn and Taylor
It is by far the hardest thing I have ever done. I second guessed myself for the first month thinking I did it too soon ... if only I could find the right drug, if only he "felt" a little better surely he could walk again, etc. Taylor had other problems aside from the mobility issue, he had an enlarged heart, an enlarged liver, and some mysterious infection that multiple antibiotics wouldn't touch, and they suspected he had laryngeal paralysis, but everything else got him before I could even begin to confront that. I felt that if we could just get that under control he would get up again, eat again, wag his tail again.
But that didn't happen, and I felt like I was letting him down. That it was up to ME to make him better ... and I had failed him. But, the cold hard reality is that they just don't live long enough. That to make him stay around in that state was not being his friend. It has completely devastated me, but it freed him. And, now, I second guess myself for waiting as long as I did. I force myself to think about it, &%^yze it, try to figure out what I was thinking, etc. ... I go from "how could I do that to him?" to "how could I make him live like that?" ... it's a roller coaster I'm sure you're familiar with. Your husband knows you well
... any way it happens, you feel like you could have, should have, done something different. How can you not when you love them so much, and they can't tell us what they're feeling. You loved her for 16 years, and I have to believe you knew her very well, and made your decision accordingly. I hate hate hate hate what I did. But I did it for him, and you can find comfort (hopefully) that you did what you did for HER, and that's exactly what you should have done. Lynn and Taylor
Dear Kim,
I'm so sorry for the loss of your sweet Sasha. My heart goes out to you. She was a beautiful girl. I am so happy for you that you had 16 wonderful years with her -but I wish you'd had many more. I admire you so for your bravery in letting her go when you knew it was time. Poor girl and her hips...my little Allie, although only two years old when she died, had very feeble hips and sometimes I am thankful that she went early before her hips got too bad. She was on glucosamine chondroitan and it was helping her, but I'm pretty sure eventually she would have had to have surgery.
It is so hard to accept but we must believe that Sasha and Allie and all the others are running and jumping and playing, and we will see them again one day!
Love,
Jenny
I'm so sorry for the loss of your sweet Sasha. My heart goes out to you. She was a beautiful girl. I am so happy for you that you had 16 wonderful years with her -but I wish you'd had many more. I admire you so for your bravery in letting her go when you knew it was time. Poor girl and her hips...my little Allie, although only two years old when she died, had very feeble hips and sometimes I am thankful that she went early before her hips got too bad. She was on glucosamine chondroitan and it was helping her, but I'm pretty sure eventually she would have had to have surgery.
It is so hard to accept but we must believe that Sasha and Allie and all the others are running and jumping and playing, and we will see them again one day!
Love,
Jenny
Lynn,
I am so sorry your Taylor had to deal with so much. I can't imagine what it must be like to see your baby in such a state of illness . Your words have really helped me more than you know. When you say that I knew Sasha best and made a decision accordingly..it is painfully true. It is hard to live with the guilt of losing her, but I don't think I could live at all if I would have let her get to a point of misery before I let her go. Knowing that I could have stopped it. I guess for coming from the pound at only 5 weeks old, after being found by a farmer in a box on the side of the road(with a litter of puppies that were not as fortunate..Sasha was the only one still alive) she didn't have it too bad 
. I really feel like she was sent to me from God. I was only 13 years old and was a volunteer at the animal shelter on the weekends (all I really did was give the dogs baths and give them one-on-one time..but I felt important !) Anyway, of all the babies that came through there, and as many as I would have LIKED to take home, something told me that I HAD to have her when she came in. Luckily, my parents love animals as much as I do and German Shepherds happen to be their favorite breed, so I had it in the bag 
! I hate to think of how different her life would have been had she gone to someone else who didn't love her like I did. I just can't imagine her being able to live chained to a doghouse or something 
. I guess that was never a question in God's eyes-he already knew who her forever mommy would be...for that I will be forever thankful!!!
Thank you again for reliving your pain so I can try to heal.
Your friend in grief,
Kim
I am so sorry your Taylor had to deal with so much. I can't imagine what it must be like to see your baby in such a state of illness
. Your words have really helped me more than you know. When you say that I knew Sasha best and made a decision accordingly..it is painfully true. It is hard to live with the guilt of losing her, but I don't think I could live at all if I would have let her get to a point of misery before I let her go. Knowing that I could have stopped it. I guess for coming from the pound at only 5 weeks old, after being found by a farmer in a box on the side of the road(with a litter of puppies that were not as fortunate..Sasha was the only one still alive) she didn't have it too bad . I really feel like she was sent to me from God. I was only 13 years old and was a volunteer at the animal shelter on the weekends (all I really did was give the dogs baths and give them one-on-one time..but I felt important !) Anyway, of all the babies that came through there, and as many as I would have LIKED to take home, something told me that I HAD to have her when she came in. Luckily, my parents love animals as much as I do and German Shepherds happen to be their favorite breed, so I had it in the bag ! I hate to think of how different her life would have been had she gone to someone else who didn't love her like I did. I just can't imagine her being able to live chained to a doghouse or something . I guess that was never a question in God's eyes-he already knew who her forever mommy would be...for that I will be forever thankful!!!Thank you again for reliving your pain so I can try to heal.
Your friend in grief,
Kim
Jenny,
What happenned to your little Allie that she passed so soon? I'm so sorry. We don't have them long enough to begin with, but when their lives are cut short it just devastates me .
I know all too well about glucosamine. We had Sasha on Cosequin, Rimadyl, Creatine, MSM,Perna,and DMG. If they made it, we bought it. We were spending about $300.00 a month on supplemnts alone! No complaints though, she was worth every penny. I still have all those bottles in the cabinet where they have always been. I kept them with my vitamins and we would take them "together" every morning when we got up. I just could'nt bear to see the cabinet empty I don't think, so there they still sit. I look at them every morning when I take my vitamins and it just kills me, but I can't throw them out either...no win situation I guess.
My thought are with you and Allie....I hope she and Sasha are enjoying their "new hips" together and running faster than ever
.
Kim
What happenned to your little Allie that she passed so soon? I'm so sorry. We don't have them long enough to begin with, but when their lives are cut short it just devastates me
. I know all too well about glucosamine. We had Sasha on Cosequin, Rimadyl, Creatine, MSM,Perna,and DMG. If they made it, we bought it. We were spending about $300.00 a month on supplemnts alone! No complaints though, she was worth every penny. I still have all those bottles in the cabinet where they have always been. I kept them with my vitamins and we would take them "together" every morning when we got up. I just could'nt bear to see the cabinet empty I don't think, so there they still sit. I look at them every morning when I take my vitamins and it just kills me, but I can't throw them out either...no win situation I guess.
My thought are with you and Allie....I hope she and Sasha are enjoying their "new hips" together and running faster than ever
.Kim
Kim,
Your words help me, also!!! I've been reading the pet loss and grief boards since April 7, and it helps to hear other's stories, I think. Especially when you read a story that is similar to your own ... and can empathize completely with what that person is going through. That's why your post jumped out at me. I knew exactly what you were feeling ... (well, not exactly, of course.)
My dog was a shelter dog, too. He was in the Detroit animal shelter ... I have no idea how he ended up there. I volunteered for the Golden Retriever rescue group, and was a foster mom for a few short months. I had decided that it just wasn't for me, and asked the rescue group if I could volunteer in other ways, that I just couldn't be a foster home. Well, two days later they called me BEGGING me to take this dog, he had nowhere to go, etc. Oy. Well, needless to say, I agreed, and fate took over. It was love at first sight. On both our parts. We were made for each other, lol. I also think about what would have happened to him if I hadn't agreed to pick him up that day. I think he was pretty darn happy to come home with me to a couch and homecooked meals every night. Yes, I cooked for my dog. He also had skin allergies and a thyroid problem, and dog food never sat well with him. The dog's vet records were a novel. People who knew us said he was "Taylor-made" just for me. They didn't even know the half of it.
Just keep remembering your special bond ... and why you made your decision, and know that she trusted you with her well-being. For good reason, I don't think it's the norm for a German Shepherd to live 16 years. You were a fantastic mommy to her. Taylor deteriorated so fast, it was all such a rush, it felt like. He was doing fine ... needed a boost to get up but then could get around OK, was still happy, then WHAM. He had an enlarged heart his whole life, and by itself wasn't life threatening, but then they age and all the other problems start cropping up, and to treat one, you just aggravate another ... pain killers for the arthritis destroy his liver but if he doesn't get pain killers he can't move .. what do you do??? You make all their decisions for them, and at 16 years, sounds like you did a damn good job.
Good thoughts.
Lynn and Taylor
Your words help me, also!!! I've been reading the pet loss and grief boards since April 7, and it helps to hear other's stories, I think. Especially when you read a story that is similar to your own ... and can empathize completely with what that person is going through. That's why your post jumped out at me. I knew exactly what you were feeling ... (well, not exactly, of course.)
My dog was a shelter dog, too.
He was in the Detroit animal shelter ... I have no idea how he ended up there. I volunteered for the Golden Retriever rescue group, and was a foster mom for a few short months. I had decided that it just wasn't for me, and asked the rescue group if I could volunteer in other ways, that I just couldn't be a foster home. Well, two days later they called me BEGGING me to take this dog, he had nowhere to go, etc. Oy. Well, needless to say, I agreed, and fate took over. It was love at first sight. On both our parts. We were made for each other, lol. I also think about what would have happened to him if I hadn't agreed to pick him up that day. I think he was pretty darn happy to come home with me to a couch and homecooked meals every night. Yes, I cooked for my dog. He also had skin allergies and a thyroid problem, and dog food never sat well with him. The dog's vet records were a novel. People who knew us said he was "Taylor-made" just for me. They didn't even know the half of it.Just keep remembering your special bond ... and why you made your decision, and know that she trusted you with her well-being. For good reason, I don't think it's the norm for a German Shepherd to live 16 years. You were a fantastic mommy to her. Taylor deteriorated so fast, it was all such a rush, it felt like. He was doing fine ... needed a boost to get up but then could get around OK, was still happy, then WHAM. He had an enlarged heart his whole life, and by itself wasn't life threatening, but then they age and all the other problems start cropping up, and to treat one, you just aggravate another ... pain killers for the arthritis destroy his liver but if he doesn't get pain killers he can't move .. what do you do??? You make all their decisions for them, and at 16 years, sounds like you did a damn good job.
Good thoughts.
Lynn and Taylor
Lynn,
All I can say is thank you. It really means a lot to hear someone, other than friends or family because you feel like they have to, say that I was a good mommy to my Sasha. I know in my heart she lived like royalty, but it is still good to hear it sometimes .
"Taylor-made" for you......how cute is that
! It really brought a smile to my face and I needed that right now . Thank you for taking in "just one more" foster baby and giving Taylor the opportunity to know your love . I wish they all could be so lucky.
Thanks for taking the time to share.
Your friend in grief,
Kim
All I can say is thank you. It really means a lot to hear someone, other than friends or family because you feel like they have to, say that I was a good mommy to my Sasha. I know in my heart she lived like royalty, but it is still good to hear it sometimes
. "Taylor-made" for you......how cute is that
! It really brought a smile to my face and I needed that right now . Thank you for taking in "just one more" foster baby and giving Taylor the opportunity to know your love . I wish they all could be so lucky. Thanks for taking the time to share.
Your friend in grief,
Kim
Dear Kim, I totally understand the pain and the guilt that you feel. Your furbaby sasha was very beautiful. I was only with my sweet boscoe for 8 short months. But some how it seems like it was an eternity. I know he to was my soul mate. I do feel guilty for his death. If only I had let him run that night maybe my boscoe would still be here with me today. But his life came to a tragic end, but I continue to beat my self up for that. I having been questioning so many of the people around the corner from me to see if anyone can shed some light on it all. But no one seems to know anything. I just keep crying, and praying that maybe someday he might come back to me. Sounds crazy uh???? I wish I had more time with him. I really do believe that we can learn so much from a furbabies. I wanted to write more about feeling so empty but I got so choked up. I feel your sorrow and my prayers go out to you and everyone who has felt the lost. They do become like our childern , and lots of ways they are. They are totally dependent on us for everything. It is a huge commitment. I don't know when I will ever be ready to get another furbaby. Hopefully your heart will start to heal. Peace to you Kim Tina
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