Shandy has been gone for less then a week, as with most of you, the loss was sudden and unexpected. For some the loss was over a period of months, for others it was over in the blink of an eye, for me it was over in 2 weeks, no matter what the time frame, the pain is still real, it is still the same for all. My girl was getting old, 12 yrs is the normal life of an English Setter, some have lived to 13 or 14, but not many. I guess Iam lucky that she lived her full life with me and although she died of cancer, it is something that alot of old dogs die from, people as well. Maybe it was her way of leaving, rather then withering away with arthritis and a host of other painful sicknesses that old dogs suffer from. I don't think that watching her fall apart due to old age would have been any easier. as a matter of fact, I think it would have been harder on me. My girl let me know it was time, she was not in pain, I did not try to keep her, or prolong her life for my sake, I loved her to much for that. I knew it was time to let her go. Yes my heart breaks and I wish it was 3 weeks ago, or a month ago, but that still would not change the fact that she was an old girl. I had a dream the first night without her, she was sitting contently by my chair in my home office while I scratched the back of her head, just like we had done so many times before. I did not speak to her, nor did I look at her and she did not look at me. It was all very calm and peaceful, this I believe now, was my dog saying that all is well and I will always be by your side. Iam at peace now with all that has happened. I gave my girl the best life imaginable, never mean, never hurtful, always just love and attention. My heart still hurts, I will always miss her and I will proably cry every now and then, but she had a good life, just like all of you have given your friends a good life, filled with love and attention. This is what you have to remember. Be gentle on yourselves, life is full of hardships and accidents, there is no reason to make it harder, by blaming yourselves for something that was out of your control. No one means to leave the door open, no one means to leave chicken bones out, no one means not to be home, or not to notice that their friend has a tumor, no one means to do anything that would hurt their most trusted friends. Remember this, for in remembering the love, attention and good life you gave them, you are remembering how much they deserved it, for giving it all back to you. Be gentle with your thoughts, with your heart and your memories. Peace and Happiness to all of you.


Kerry

Hi, Kerry-

You made some excellent points in your post...thank you. Sometimes in the midst of deep grief it's hard to see the truth, and as you basically said, none of us would have ever put our precious furry friends in harms way on purpose.

Thanks again,
Kathleen

Thank you, Kerry, for the gentle kind reminder. We all need that sometimes. I do understand how much you still miss your precious Shandy.
love,
Marcia

Thank you so much! I am living with so much guilt due to the door not being completly shut. I took my baby from an abusive life and gave her a great loving life. I will always love her and need to get over my guilt.

That was absolutely a wonderful post. None of us would purposely harm our pets, and we do what we think it right. We can't be there 24 hours a day, and do the best we can.

I am glad you were able to spend so many years with Shandy. It sounds like you made the most of them.

If we decide to get another, that is what we have to do. Make the most of the time we spend with them.