Ive done something i NEVER thought i do.

We've decided to send Meatball on his way.

3 years ago I almost lost him to a backed up uninary tract the doctor said probably missed it
by hours. One option that was brought up on the way to the vet was putting him to sleep.
I said I would never NEVER give him up. The thought made me furious.
He was MY cat and I wouldnt give him up for anything. As time went on my look at it softened
to "If He needed it"
Until today my attitude was almost back to the 1st, but some things happened.
1: I found a way to ask my questions about my role of his Guardian protector, and got a answer that i
Believed Because they werent friends and family trying to get me in a better mood.
2: Today as i said in my last post, I believe in my heart he told me he knows where he is going and what he means to me
So tonight I plan to let him sleep with me as usual, although i prolly wont be able to sleep at all.
Its okay though i'll put in a dvd in the computer and watch it, and give him rubs all night. then when my ride gets here we'll take him to the vet and tell him about how dad loves "rubs" and animals that sit in his lap, and (best of all) he will get all the tuna he wants. (lol) Tell him I love him and will miss him. Then, deliver him to Dad.
Meatball or what my roomate calls him some "dude" was always kinda skitish cat, when company came in, he went out. or would hide in 1 of the bedrooms.
Dad on the other hand was able to hold him on occasion.
The last time we brought him home from the vet about a week ago I think, for the next 3 days he was the classic meatball, rubs all the time even when i was in the middle of something.
(hehe) he sent some instant messages out for me by walking on the keyboard. Purred in this high-pitched "Im happy" purr.
Crawled under the sheets to play "blanket of Death" with any fingers that happen to poke them or any toes he happen to see from under them.
Unfortunately, the week led to todays desicion. But, those 3 days I think will be the most cherished moments I will have of him because he was sick for months and to see him like that was amazing, it helped me alot. It was just all too brief.
I realized today its for the best, and tonight im surprisingly calm If a bit talky.

He is to me, your pets were to you, "The best cat in the world"
Again thanks for listening. David

David, you are an amazingly strong person. I wish you lots of peace and serenity tomorrow as you help Meatball over the bridge. I've never had to do that and I don't know that I would have the courage. But from reading everyone's posts on the subject, I know there's a LOT of support here.
I'll be thinking of you tomorrow.
Audrey

David, Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you as you set your precious Meatball free from pain. As you give him the gift of freeing him from pain your dad will take him in his arms and give him those rubs. I am just so sorry he could not stay longer with you.
Ann

David--

You are a loving and selfless person and I know what a hard decision you've had to make. And I know that Meatball realizes what incredible love you have for him. Enjoy and make the best out of your last night (on earth) with him. I am so grateful for the last night I spent with my kitty Felix before he passed on. I will never regret the time we had and I gave him as much love as could have possibly given (he gave me that and then some).

He'll always be your baby boy.

Post as often and as much as you need to. It helps and we're here to support you.

You both are in my thoughts,
Krystal

David,
I am so sorry you have to make this choice for Meatball, but I do believe you are doing the right thing. Having had to do this before, I think I understand how much in pain you must be, and I hope you can find some solace in knowing you are relesing him from pain. I hope you can find the support you need from this group. I am so very sorry.
~Toni