Its been a little more than a month, that I had to put Schatszie, my Weimaraner since a puppy, to sleep, and I came across this site, whereby, it was of some relief to know that I'm not alone in dealing with what seems to be a 'non-ending' grief period. I got Schatszie as a puppy, my second Weimar, and spent countless days training her in field and obedience. I had an excellent relationship with my other female Weimar, but Schatszie was way different.....She was crazy about me! She absolutely could not stand to be out of my sight. Thanks to my Parents, they watched over her while I was at work. When I would leave, she would stand at the front gate and stand there awaiting my return for hours/all day, until my Parents called her back in. In 1997 my Parents moved as well as I, and my new location provided me 5 acres for Schatszie, but the situation of her standing at front gate still persisted, every day....when I would return from work, there she would be, standing at gate looking down the road, awaiting my return, regardless of weather conditions. You see, I've never been married, and after numerous dead-end relationships, living alone, Schatszie was my everything. In 1997, I got tired of my profession, started a small business in home, whereby I could spend most of my time with Schatszie. She went every where with me in car, if weather permitted, to the store....dentist....you name it. Two years ago, she went on Thyroid medication, followed up with a high ALP Liver problem, and then followed by chronic renal failure. I started her on Science K/d food, and in Jan. 2005, my Vet gave her ~3weeks. She had no outward signs of kidney problems, except for mustle wasting in hind legs, and occasional mustle fatigue after exercising. With no for-notice, at 5:00AM on April 4, she woke me up next to my bed, with heavy panting and salivating, followed with a seizure. I rushed her to vet...they did IV's, but the seizure(End Stage Renal Failure) left her immobile....no mustle strenght, due to uremia of blood. I took her home, stayed up all night with her for 2.5 days, taking her outside to urinate etc., until both she and I were total;ly exhausted. She quit eating at the last, and I definitely knew it was time to do the hardest thing I would ever have to do in my whole life, next to burying my Parents, and that was call the Vet to come and put Schatszie to sleep....Put my Best Friend I've ever had in this life to sleep. Ladies and gentlemen, I know I'm among friends here when I say this,......"It is Hell On Earth, Living alone at 50 Years Old, and your BEST FRIEND, THE ONLY ONE YOU'LL EVER HAVE THAT LOVED YOU THE WAY SCHATSZIE LOVED ME, and THEY ARE GONE. I had already pre-fabbed her burial box, but I also had a 2'x3' granite slab inscribed, "Schatszie".....Jan. 22, 1993 - Arl. 6, 2005......"our Memories Together Will Never Fade,"....."But Your Absence Will Never Heal"......."I Love You Schatszie". To all of you that have lost 'Your Best Friend', Its a long rocky road to getting over grief. You are basically on your own. No one wants to really understand or hear about such. My greatest fear at present, is that I'll never get over this, and will never be able to get another Weimaraner again, without expecting her to be just like Schatszie, which of course, there will never be another Schatszie. My Heart goes out to all of you grieving. Our "Friends" just don't live long enough do they? Earl

Dear Earl,

I cried as I read your post about Schatszie. She sounds like she was such wonderful friend and companion. I can empathize with the loss you're feeling right now because your relationship with Schatzie sounds so similar to my relationship with Shiloh.

You are amoung friends here...people who understand the special bond that exists between humans and their furbabies.

I'm so sorry for you loss.
Kathleen

PS - you're right...our friends don't live long enough. Shiloh had lymphoma and died shortly after her 5th birthday.

Hi Earl, My heart goes out to you as I read the story of your precious Schatszie. It is hard to get over the loss when they have been the love of your life and just like a child to you. She loved you just as much as you loved her. It will take a lot of time but the pain will get better. However even though the pain lessens we keep on missing our babies so much. I love the granite slab and the words of love you added to it, it show your great love for her. No Earl, they do not live anywhere near long enough in my opinion.
Ann

Earl, I too cried as I read your post. We DO understand. I love Weimeraners. They are close to my breed, German Shorthairs.
I'm 33 and I had my Jasmine for about 10 years...a third of my life was spent with her in it. She was my life, my love. She was there through so many life changes, trials and tribulations. My constant in this world. I do have another one, Bailey and he is 8, and he sounds more like Schatszie in personality. I'm so thankful I have him. But as independent as Jasmine was, we had a bond that was deep.
No, there won't be anohter Schatszie, but since I do have Bailey, I can say that each bond we have with our pets is unique and special. In time, I'm sure you will love again and find the companionship that only pets can give us.
It is hard when you feel like no one in your "real" life wants to hear or understand what you're going through. You have to choose wisely who to confide in. But rest assured you are safe here.
I also love the ingraving on the concrete....so special.
I'm so sorry for your loss and please keep coming here and sharing stories of Schatszie.
Audrey

Hi Earl,
My heart just broke for you as I read your post. And I could so relate to being 50ish and having buried my parents..and then my best friend...my best friend that helped me through burying my mom and dad. Now I struggle with the same things you discribed. I wish you Peace. Pamela

Dear Earl,

My heart goes out to you. I know exactly what you mean, knowing that Schatszie is so irreplaceable. I am so very sorry for the loss of your sweet girl. But I do believe that there's hope for a love that is just as strong in the future. I know that's probably not something you can even think about right now, but I can tell you that two months ago I thought that I would never be able to love another dog again as much as I loved Allie. But two weeks ago I adopted a puppy. The first time I looked at her I saw something in her eyes that told me she needed me. She has some similar characteristics (both looks and personality-wise) to Allie, but she is very different in a lot of other ways. But I love her more and more each day, and I know that I'll be able to form a strong bond with her. I won't ever have the exact same bond with her as I did with Allie. My friendship with Lucy will be as unique and special as she is -however I know there will be just as much love between us. I pray that one day you'll be able to find that special love again too.

You're right, Man's (and Woman's) Best Friend just doesn't live long enough. I only had two years with Allie, but I know even 100 wouldn't have been enough. There is light at the end of the tunnel, so hang on. I'm glad that you have come here to share your grief. You will meet some wonderful people here who will help you tremendously. I know that without the support I found here, I wouldn't be where I am right now in this awful, devastating process.

We're here for you,
Jenny

Earl,
No our "friends" don't live long enough....... I'm so sorry you lost your best friend Schatszie. You are not alone in your grief, we are all here for you. We each know the pain of losing a beloved furbaby.

As for adopting another furbaby.... No you'll never find another one just like Schatszie but you'll find one that you will love for different reasons and they'll love you too.

Time really does heal, maybe not all but it does heal. Take it one day at a time and know that our thoughts are with you.

Hugs,
Dawn

Hi Earl,

I meant to name you in my post in another thread, but it was getting out of hand so I decided to reply to you directly.

I know what it's like to have a little furry pal that goes everywhere with you, and waits for you to return home when she can't go with. Qorqui EXPECTED to go with me whenever I left the house. When she couldn't she gave me this look like I was abandoning her and I always felt guilty about leaving her home. When I would come home from work or wherever I had been without her, she'd be at the front window watching for me, then when I'd come in the back door she'd come running, say "Roo-woo" and, for lack of a better description, body check me. Then she'd run off and find whatever toy it was time to play with.

I had no idea how I was going to make it at first. This site helped me gain the strength to get back on a reasonably normal routine. In time I was able to entertain the idea of another Corgi, and a little while later I got up the nerve to take a trip to see if there was "anyone" out there that might fit into my life. As it turned out there was. At a little place south of Oklahoma City, a 12ish week old little black headed tri colored Corgi now named Kali selected me from all the humans she could have had.

I'm sure it's different for everyone, and only you can determine if the time is right. But I do believe that you will be able, in time, to get another female Weimaraner. When you reach a point where you won't expect her to be like Schatszie. I may have pushed it a bit because there have been times where Kali would do something like Qorqui did and it would hit me pretty hard, but now that Kali's own personality is coming through and I see all the differences I appreciate her for how she IS different rather than hoping for sameness.

This site really can help you heal. Stop in and post how you're doing that day, or help others, or just read the threads.

Tim

Earl, I think that you have found this site in itself is a blessing. To know that you are not alone in what you are feeling, when some others don't seem to care sometimes in everyday life, goes a mile.

I had many different responses to my loss of Abby, through family and friends. I think some just felt they needed to say something, but really can't comprehend what our babies mean to us. Fortunataley, I had a few that actually could let out some feelings, knowing I was so down.

My heart goes out to your for your loss of Schatszie. In reading your post there was a true love and bond between the two of you.

It is so hard to say goodbye to them. For myself, I try to remember the many good years we shared together, instead of the final days. I think that has helped me.

Words cannot express how truly sorry I am.

Midwest

Dear Earl,

After reading your heartrending story, I was overwhelming with sorrow and sadness. How well so many of us know the searing pain of our fur baby's absence.

My beloved German Shepherd, Shep, lived with us for over 13 years. He was an adorable puppy that grew into one of the most fantastic creatures I've ever known. Oh, the fun we had with him! One day he wandered out of the yard and was gone for what seemed an eternity. My youngest sister, who was barely six at the time, sobbed unconsolably for him until she collapsed on the sofa and fell asleep with his bone clutched in her little fingers.

We all were a wreck--my whole family! We searched the neighborhood frantically but no Shep. Finally, later that night, my Dad had walked to the end of the block and was again whistling for him and calling him when he heard the jingle of his collar and saw him trotting toward him. He was overcome with anger but so glad to see him that he couldn't bear to scold him. He laughed and cried when he told us that Shep spied him and began to slowly ease toward him, almost crawling on his belly because he knew he wasn't a good boy. I can still to this day feel the exuberance, the joy, the relief of having him back, safe and sound. I still give thanks to God for bringing him back home.

He did everything with us. He was the biggest clown and the most ferocious watch dog. He knew minutes before my Uncle Bill (his soulmate) arrived at our house that he was on his way. Bill would take him for long runs in a nearby wooded area. The memories we have of Shep bring a richness and goodness to our lives that no material wealth could ever bring. My Dad would invite the neighbor kids to pile in the car and off we'd go for ice cream. In between all of us in the back seat was this big, lovable German Shepherd. Yes, you guessed it, Shep would always get his own dish of vanilla ice cream and the sight of him eating ice cream in the parking lot never failed to illicit laughs and off the wall comments. He was a born entertainer!

Earl, Shep didn't experience the painful illness that your beloved Schatszie did. Nor did we have to go through the desperation of trying to help her. One day Shep couldn't get up and he couldn't hold his bladder. I'll never forget the painful, pleading look in his eyes. He was such a dignified dog. He would have rather held his bowels and bladder to the point of bursting than to mess the house. In his eyes I saw his request to please let him go. It was the hardest decision we've ever made. My mother and us kids had paid to see a beautiful horse event that evening and although none of us truly wanted to go, we forced ourselves to go. We sat in the audience sobbing. I'm quite sure people around us thought we had lost our minds. The event was wonderful, but all we could see was Shep's beautiful face and know that he would not be there when we got home.

My Dad cried for weeks. I'd hear him sobbing in the bathroom with the door closed. He was a strong, manly man but he was also a deep feeling compassionate soul who was overwhemed by grief in losing our beloved Shep.

Shep has been gone from us for more than 35 years but his memory is so indelible it's like I can gaze off into the distance and whistle for him and see his beautiful ears perk up and look into those wise eyes and he is with me again.

Earl, I am so sorry for your pain. I want you to now that men who experience such deep feeling and are not afraid or ashamed to express it, show a rare depth of compassion. It is not often that we encounter such men. Showing emotion is not a sign of weakness but a display of true courage and strength.

We all wish there were words we could say that would sooth your aching heart and take away all the pain. Words seem so inadequate at times but words are all that we have to give you at this moment.

As you so eloquently spoke, there will never be another dog as magical, as special, as your beloved Schatszie. How could there be? But....there will be another dog, special and magical in his/her own way. A dog that will capture your heart, just at the right time, and you will find yourself in love all over again, willing to open your heart to whatever time and experiences this new dog will bring to your life.

Only you will know when the time is right, Earl. You have a selfless, generous love to give and you have every right to express it again. Schatszie would want you to be happy, I'm sure. And although you may not find yourself even considering these thoughts for a very long time, think of her wanting you to love again--and you will!!!

The road to healing is different for every soul. No one can say when, or how long. Only you will know. I found this site by accident and it has been a true blessing. I've loved all animals since I was a tiny child. My mother swears I came into the world saying "Horsey, Mommy, Horsey! I have 10 cats in my care and two Arabian horses. I've been deeply involved with, and commited to animal rights' issues for most of my adult life. I know the pain of loss all too intimately. It never gets more tolerable no matter how many times you say goodbye to a dear animal baby. My heart is so calloused from breaking and healing that I marvel that it still beats. But as long as I can feel and make a difference, I will love animals with all my heart and will try to reach out to others who are hurting.

You will find solace and encouragement and understanding here, Earl. If we could reach out and hug you and cry with you, we would for we know all too well the pain you are enduring.

Come as often as you need and never be afraid to pour out your heart. Tells us fun stories of you and Schatszie. It's amazing how cathartic that can be.

May God comfort you in your grief. You are not alone. We will hold you up in our thoughts and prayers.

With great love and sympathy,

--Susan
~ a voice for the voiceless ~