Its been one year ago today that I lost my (cat) baby, Sparky to liver cancer. As some of you may know from my past postings, its been a hard year. Sparky, like a lot of your babies, was my baby, my soul mate and we had such a bond that even death can't break. It has taken me quite awhile to get back on my feet, but not a day that goes by that I still don't quitely, grieve for him. I've been through everything from questioning religion to talking to an amimal communicator. No matter what I try or how much I cry, it just doesn't change the fact that he is gone from this life. They say that time will heal my broken heart, but I still think that my heart will never heal, it just seems to me that you just grow to accept it, because thats all you can do. I've done some positive things, I've adopted two beautiful kittens and I still have the dog that was my mother-inlaws. (She died less then 24 hours after Sparky did). I've also given money to help with research for felines and dogs (morris animal foundation). I am trying to get on with my life and appreiciate all the wonderful times that I had with Sparky, we had a short 17 years together. The most important thing I guess that I have learned is that I know that I will be with him again, when my time is finished.

I am so thankful for this web-site, knowing that I'm not alone, makes a world of difference. Thank you again for listening.

KDH,

I too have questioned and thought about all the things you have. I also thought about using an animal communicator to talk to my kitty on the other side, but I decided not to because I can guess what the answers will be already. I didn't think it would be useful or make me feel better. I hope you got what you expected out of your session. As for religion, the only answer that I come up with is that all things have been preplanned and that only God knows when and how. I envy you that you've had 17 years together. If only I could have had half of what you had.

I'm glad you adopted 2 kittens and that you have the dog. I have also adopted a kitten about 1 week afterwards. It was the best decision I made and I don't think I could have survived mentally with all the thinking and mourning I was doing. She made the house less empty. At first I didn't think I would warm up to the kitten but she is just a little character and makes me smile. Your kitties will never take the place of Sparky but they will bond with you and be your family too.

After I had told a co-worker about what had happened regarding the loss of my cat, she replied "he is at peace" and that made me feel a lot better. I truly believe that your Sparky is at peace too. I read on a web site of an animal communicator that animals have no fear and concept of death. To them it is a natural part of the life cycle. If only we humans could accept this as easily. It's still hard for me to accept. Especially when the loss didn't come naturally, but I keep on telling myself "only God know when and how" and that keeps me going. I think if I didn't find any solace in God I would be on the verge of a nervous breakdown because the unanswered question that I think a lot of us have is "why?" and only God knows why.

KDH, we all share your pain. There is a light at the end of the tunnel and I believe that when our time is up on earth we will be reunited with our loved ones again. I know it will come true!

Sincerely,
ttran05

I remember your past posts -- they helped me a lot. My cat Saki also died of liver cancer, about 6 months after you lost Sparky.

So it has been about 6 months since I lost Saki... and yeah, it still hurts. Sometimes I try to explain to people who are new on the forum what happens with time, but it is so hard to explain. The pain does not go away-- it gets easier to manage. I think you are right-- some acceptance comes, but the heartbreak does not heal. You learn how to cope with the pain, but it is still there.

I've also got a couple new kitties. When they snuggle with me, it makes me smile. They are fun to play with, too. Tim is madly in love with our new dog Hathor, but whatever new love or joys we have-- they can't replace or change what we had with our former furbabies.

I do have faith that we will meet again, that they are at the bridge. I have to believe that. I think if I didn't I really would lose my mind.

Love,
Jennifer