It's odd, reading through the posts here I feel such a sense of sadness and grief for everyone, knowing how we all loved our babies. But when I post something, it seems to help me feel better.

I'm at work and just came back from a meeting where I made a bit of a scene.

Whenever I was feeling down, and Qorqui would try to comfort me, I would sing a little nonsensical song and pet her as she sat on my lap.
Baby puppy, my baby puppy, my little baby puppy dog.
Baby puppy, little baby puppy, I really love my puppy dog.

Well, for no reason I can think of, that song popped into my head during the meeting. I choked back the tears and bolted out of the conference room. Once in the hallway I lost it and headed for the restroom to try to compose myself.

On the way back to my desk, I ran into some of the folks from the meeting and had to explain what "that" was all about. As near as I can tell, there's several folks here that now think I'm a nut, and a couple that realize that this grouchy old guy actually has a heart.

Anyway, I needed to get this out or I'll be spending the rest of the day, and night, sobing.

Thanks for being here!
Tim

Tim,

You are not a nut case.. I wish there were more caring people like you in this world today. I used to sing to Bubba all the time. When I changed the sheets he used to help me by running his paws on the sheets like he was getting out the wrinkles. I had a silly song I used to sing to him when we did the sheet changing ritual! I think it just shows the love and compassion you have in your heart.

Kim

Tim,

I have to say that is the sweetest little song I've ever heard and it made me cry. I used to sing to my Allie and it went a little something like this...ahem....Ohhh, my Allie-boop boop; Is the cutest girl in all the land; And I love her so; She's my little baby girl; Allie, Allie etc. etc. It would change every time but that was the gist. Thanks for sharing your song -that made my day. ~Jenny

Tim - Your song was precious!!! How lucky Qorqui was to have had you for a dad!

I used to sing to Rusty all the time and I still sing to my dog, Heidi. My son says, "Mommmmmmmm" but I sing anyway If you're nuts, then all of us here are (and I wouldn't have it any other way!) At least now some of your co-workers no longer think you have no heart

Lynn

Tim,
Every time I see Qorqui I have to laugh. She is the prettiest dog I've ever seen, other than my Rosa of course. I know you loved her so much, as I am sure she loved you. I have to share a story about crying. I lost my Rosa on Good Friday. I did not eat until Monday afternoon when I decided to order a pizza. Well, I went to pick it up. The kid behind the counter was about 18 y/o and said "how are you sir?". I started cying like a baby and said "nottttttttttttttttt goooooooooooooood" his response was "are you here for a pick up?" Now I can laugh about it, but at the time it wasn't funny. Just hang in the Tim. We can all heal together. bye for now Rusty :-))

Dear Tim,

I find it so endearing that we all sang to our babies. I actually wrote 2 musicals for Shiloh. Both musicals, "Shiloh-A Dog and Her HB (human being)" and "Shiloh the Sequel - In Search of Her Lost Tail," consisted of a bunch of short little songs that I would sing to Shiloh.

As far as feeling silly about what happened today...please don't. Some people will understand your tears, and others, no matter how hard you try and explain, will never understand. Remember, you're grieving the loss of a very dear friend...you're going to have breakdowns every now and then...allow yourself those breakdowns and be gentle with yourself when they happen.

You're in my thoughts.
Kathleen

There are people who just don't understand our feelings when you lose the one you love. That's ok............that is their problem.
Those folks who saw you...... thinking you have a heart............only cared about you. They probabely knew you have a special heart because Qorqui was a part of your life and you may have shared part of the joys with someone you work with.

Yes, out of no where...........your emotions will cause tears in thinking of Qorqui. It happens to me, as well. It is amazing............how this awesome love lives on in our minds and hearts...............and I love every moment of it.

It is good that you write and continue to share your your thoughts, feelings and experiences here.

We too...........may be nuts.......if judged......call it as they will...........but everyone here has the biggest heart in the whole world and I am soooooo proud to be a animal lover and a part of this wonderful group of friends

I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels silly. I know exactly how you feel and though my "tragedy" only occurred early this morning, I can already imagine there will be some folks at work that will regret crossing my path thru no fault of thier own.

Hi Tim,

Oh boy, do I know what you are talking about!
I used to cry at work alot the first month after losing my Rachael. It became so "common" to my co-workers, that I noticed people would walk up and talk to me like nothing unusual was happening with me when tears were staining my cheeks. They all soon accepted that I would have bad days and they "allowed" me to cry without making a scene.

Your post reminded me of the song I used to sing to my Rachael. I used to sing the song "I love you a bushel and a peck....etc." I haven't sung that song, or even thought of it since Rachael passed. I find that strange. I guess in my mind that was only Rachael's song. Thank you for reminding of me of that memory.

I just love the picture of Qorquis! Such a beautiful little girl

We're always here for you Tim!
Cheri

Tim,

Hmm... sillly? I think not! You loved Qorqui and you miss that little sweetheart. That meeting was probably a snore fest (as the one's I've been attending lately are) and your mind wandered right to your angel. Yep... that would trigger the tears for me!

That song is so sweet!! We had our "Inky Baby" song and still sing it at least twice a week!

If you're silly, then we're all riding around on that same nut truck!!

I had two songs I used to sing to Ellie. I would cuddle her up in my arms and hold her right up close to my face, rock her in my arms like a baby and then sing to her.
One song was,
Oh, she is, yes she is, sweeter than jam but nicer.
If, she was mine, I think I, could almost manage to eat her.
The second song was
Daisy, daisy give me your answer do, etc.

Why those two songs? Heaven knows! She would always lie completely still, looking up at me while I was singing 2 inches from her little face. She seemed to like it.

I'm sure your little Qorqui loved his song too, Tim. There will sometimes be moments and memories that just catch you somehow and bring you to tears. It is so so hard to lose a furbaby who is such a beloved part of the family. I hope so much that the people at work understand and are able to be supportive and realise what a very difficult and painful time it is for you.

My thoughts are with you.
with love
jilly