Just a few weeks ago,
He was just a little fuzzy ball of fur, he barked at everything,
such a fine watch dog, always giving out free growls to everyone,
Just a few days ago,
He came up from the back seat, planted his feet and faced off an over bearing pan handler who had come to close to my car window demanding I give him money, I will never forget that, I don't think I was ever in any real danger, but the little 19 pounder was ready for anything anyway,
Just a day ago,
He would make me smile as he would charge for the car when I offered to take him for a ride, he loved to hang his head out my side and smell the air as we drove around, of course he thoroughly enjoyed making a tremendous ruckus as we drove by someone on a bicycle, don't know how many bikers went down from the surprise, I was afraid to look behind,
Just a few hours ago,
He and I would enjoy a walk around the lake, we were both a little slower, took us a little longer, but we enjoyed it just as much or maybe even more,
Just a few minutes ago,
I knew he had survived a brush with death, his age was beginning to catch up to him and his heart was growing weak, but the vet said with care, medication, and love he might have a good quality of life for a while longer, I gave him all the love I could, the only time he did not go with me was when I had to go to work,
I hated leaving him in the mornings, I thought of him often at work and I would rush home afterwards to make sure he received his medications on time,
Just a moment ago,
I rushed home from work only to find that he had passed away sometime during the day, I hate myself for that, I wasn't there when he needed me the most,
I play that day over and over in my mind,
I will never forgive myself for that,
An eternity ago,
He was laid to rest in a pet cemetary near my home, I placed his favorite toy and a picture of me in his little casket, I knew he wasn't there, and I pray he's in a better place,
Tomorrow,
I will grieve for him again, I will replay the day I left him and he left me, I will cry in disbelief that he has gone, I will remember the good times when he and I would ride in the car, or take our walk to the mail box, or startle the bike riders,
I hope its enough,
Good bye Bo

I'm so sorry that you lost your dear friend.

I know how hard it is not to be there when they pass. My girl died at the vet's. It was completely unexpected.

I too have replayed the last day over and over and OVER again. I did this to a point of it becoming an obsession. It does get easier though.

I'm glad that you found this site.

Oh, oh, oh. Another beautiful, heartbreaking story you have shared about Bo. The bicycles though . . . how cute and funny. You reminded me of things like that which Hannah used to do too. Thank you, Bo's daddy. Bo KNEW for sure how much you loved him, so please try not to dwell on the fact that you had to go to work and weren't able to be there. I know very well how hard that is, but just remember Bo knows he was loved so very much, okay? He knows.
Marcia

Hi Darrell, I can feel every pain in your broken heart that your sweet Bo is gone and you are missing him so badly. Keep coming and talking to us, and keep talking about your feelings and Bo. You could not help that you had to work and was not there with Bo. After all if you did not work you would have been a bum on the street and could not have taken care of your Bo. He knows how much you loved him and took good care of him.

The pain is so terrible but someday it will be bearable where at least you can live with it and learn to live without them. At first all I could think of was my little girls were not with me anymore and how much I missed them. Then the good memories started coming and they began to fill my broken heart where the shattered pieces lay.

Oh I still miss them both more than anything but now I laugh at some of the things they did. So along with the tears I can smile as I hold their memories close to my heart. Just hold on the pain will lessen and you will smile again when you think of your precious Bo.
Ann

Dear Bo's Dad,

I'm so very sorry that you lost your sweet Bo. It's so hard isn't it? It's so heartbreaking to think about our babies getting sick. And so hard wishing we could just bring them back, but knowing that we can't.

Please don't feel guilty though. It's such a normal reaction to do that (I know I did) but you did everything you possibly could have and provided a wonderful, happy life for Bo. You gave him proper vet care, and loved him with all of your heart. Bo was so lucky to have a Dad like you.

I was so sad that my Allie spent her last day cooped up in the kitchen, and her last hours in an emergency hospital surrounded by people she didn't know. If I had known it would be her last day, of course I would have done some things differently. But there's no way to know when death will come, and so we just have to be thankful that each minute we were given with them was filled with happiness and love. And rest assured, Bo is restored to health again. He is well, and he knows how much you love him...he can feel that love from heaven.

I found this article and found it very helpful in explaining some Biblical references to animals and heaven. I don't know if you are religious at all, but if you are, I hope this will help. http://www.americancatholic.org/Messenger/...03/Feature2.asp.

Much love,
Jenny

Thank you all so much for your support. I read the sad stories of others who have suffered a recent loss and see how you try and comfort as many as you can. God bless you for that. I know it has to be hard for you to. When I read your replies, it gives me some strength and hope for a better day down the road. Yes, I do believe in god and I have searched the web for anything that pertains to dogs/pets and heaven, so I thank you for the web site. I'm not very good at trying to console the people who have a recent loss. Maybe later when Bo is not so strong on my mind I can join with you in support of others. Until then please keep up the good work. I come to this site every morning and every evening after work. I will probably post another grief stricken message about Bo and I will probably sob again as I read through other peoples grief stricken messages, but that is what I need now, Bo was not just like a member of the family as so many put it, he was my family.
Darrell