Well it's been 6 weeks since I last kissed and loved my little man.
I thought I was healing but not so.
I'm not sure what has happened but the last 4 or 5 days have been awful.
I am having a hard time coming here to the site as reading some of the posts casues my pain to feel
brand new. I was able to speak about him...now I can't without crying.
I spend a lot of time looking at pictures of Indy. I cannot believe I will never see him again.
I am still looking for him and have begun to avoid some activities that remind me of him.
Is this normal, this backward step????
Or was I fooling myself...thinking I was healing but really just avoiding.?
Need to hear if others have had a similar experience.
Thanks.
Fran

I had to avoid everything, i think it is normal for some people, I ran from anything that would remind me of what I had lost. In time I was able to deal with it but it took awhile. I could not sleep in my room, look at pictures, drive to the end of the road where it happened, it was truely awful, but gets better, never stop missing their presence but the sharp edge dulls a little. Pamela

Dear Fran,

It's hard to believe it has been 6 weeks already. I know that time hasn't been fast for you, but I can remember when you first joined us, and it seems like yesterday.

I have noticed a pattern very similar to yours here at LS. Most of us seem to go through those days when we feel "okay". We start to feel relief that the pain has subsided somewhat. Then, suddenly we are back to square one. I know that I experienced that too. It's like your body shuts down and takes a "rest" from all the pain. Then, when it is "recharged", the pain comes back. This appears to be very normal in our grieving process. Give yourself time. If reading the posts in here bring you down right now, then please take a break until you feel stronger again. We ALL understand. We'll all be here for you if you need to post and "talk".

You're in my thoughts,
Cheri

Dear Fran,

There's nothing strange about how you feel and it most definitely isn't going backward. Our babies were in our lives for years... how can we get over losing them in just weeks? Let yourself feel what you feel and don't beat up on yourself.

Tomorrow is a week since my Inky left. He was a major piece of my heart for over 13 years and and continues to be. I'm sure that six months from now I'll find myself in a puddle of tears just at the thought of him, as I do now.... it's normal. We LOVE them!

Take good care of YOU today, just as your baby would want.

Hugs,

Pat

Dear Fran,

I think your feelings are normal. Tomorrow will be one week since my Sasha left me, and yesterday I had a terrible day. I agree, it was just like the first day. I think we are the kind of people that love hard, and you don't get over that loss in a few weeks. You had your Indy for years and he was a family member.

I can't talk about Sasha without crying. I think we just have to give ourselves the whatever time we need to heal and I don't think we can say we will feel OK in a particular period of time.

I am thinking of you and hoping you will feel better real soon!

Nancy (Sasha's Mom)

Thank you for your kind words.
As always, the LS family has come through and given me the support I've needed.
So grateful we are all here for each other.
Love,
Fran

No, you are not going backwards. It just takes a very long time to come to terms with such a devastating loss.

I'm at over 8 months, and am generally ok. Sometimes I still cry for her though. The photo thing with me went through stages: first I could not stop looking at her photos, then I couldn't look at them at all. Now I can look at them fine, but if I start thinking about her for too long I stil get really sad.

I'm sorry for your loss.

Steph-
Thanks for sharing your experiences.
I really need to know I am not alone (or a little batty) in
the things I've been experiencing.
Fran

Dear Fran,

So sorry to hear you're going through a bad time. I believe it's perfectly normal to have ups and downs while grieving our precious pets. Some days I feel somewhat "normal" and others, I cry as if I just lost Rusty. I found it very interesting what Abby's Mommy's therapist said about the body protecting itself from pain. Makes alot of sense. (Thanks for sharing that info., Abby's Mommy.)

Hang in there, Fran..........

You're in my thoughts,
Lynn

Dear Fran:

What you are going through is sooooooooooo very, very normal.....
It has been a year since my Ernestine was put to sleep.......

And, after 2 & 1/2 weeks, I thought I was doing just fine........ I was feeling great............. And, after
having my girl for 2 months shy of 20 years, I thought,
"How am I doing this well?????"

I just couldn't believe it.........

Well, within like 10 days, wham, bam, I felt just as awful as I felt the day that she was put to sleep.....

I couldn't believe that I went from "doing quite well", to falling apart again........

And, many people on LS told me that what I was going through was absolutely normal!!!



(*****THIS QUOTE IS FROM ABBY'S MOMMY'S POST --- LAST PARAGRAPH*****)

I have to believe that that is what happened to me.....
(Thank you for sharing, Abby's mommy).....

What I have heard from the very, very beginning.............was...............
FOR EVERY YEAR THAT YOU OWN YOUR FURBABY..............IT DOES TAKE AT LEAST ONE MONTH PER YEAR"TO GET OVER THE PASSING OF OUR FURBABIES".....

(and, I'm not sure that we "ever get over it completely"......)

God Bless You all...

Love, Denise

Fran- I know this must be such a difficult time for you. I am at the one week mark and I can't even imagine making it to where you are right now. It probably feels like you have been missing your Indy for a lifetime. What a special soul he was. You are still grieving the loss of your little one, and that is okay. Today was hard for me, but I am hoping tomorrow will be a bit better. I am wishing you strength during this "healing" time. And that is exactly what it is...a time to heal. There is no amount of time that it takes. It is a process, like everthing else. I'm thinking of you during this time....you were such a wonderful support to me when I needed it so desperately. I love looking at Indy's picture. The big eyes and ears. What a sweetheart.

Caroline

Dear Fran,
I agree with the others - it was interesting to hear what Abby's Mommy's therapist said about the body protecting itself. There are days when we'll feel better & then we'll be back to square one again. We get so close to our furbabies, & when they are gone it takes a long time - & many ups & downs - to get over them. And can I take this opportunity to say that the photo you have of Indy is absolutely adorable - he has the cutest little face!! Thinking of you..
Hugs,
Elsie

Dear Fran,
I hope you are feeling a little better now. I know how hard we all try to work at getting better and it seems like we are. Then our heartbreak and even memories throw us for a loop. It may be some place we have been with our baby or even someone walking their dog or any other thing that starts our tears all over again. I think it will be a battle we will all face for a long time to come. It is so hard to give them up when we loved them with all our hearts. Hugs
Ann