My poor little kitty was very sick and had to be put to sleep on Monday. She was dying, so it was the right thing to do. I miss her so much and feel like I won't be able to go on without her. She gave me so much joy. I can't even bear to vacuum because then I will erase her paw prints from the carpet. I just keep sobbing uncontrollably. She was the best cat ever. How do I go on without her? I miss taking naps with her. I miss her sitting on my lap, begging for treats, smelling her little kitty cat head. If anyone has any advise on how to get through this, I would appreciate it. Laurie LKSutton@sbcglobal.net

I had to edit this....the message description shows November 10, 2001, but should be 2003.

Hi Laurie. We will all help you get through this. Please tell us more about your wonderful fur baby. Name, color? I lost my baby of 19 years on May 1, 2003. I have still not washed the blanket where she slept under the table. I just dont want to wash away her hair that is on it. The blanket does not have her scent anymore (I think I smelled it so much that it is now scentless) I also made the choice to let my girl go peacefully in my arms at the vets. We made the right choice by helping them go to the Rainbow Bridge where they will never feel sick again. Your baby is in your heart and soul forever. Try to make it a point to think of a happy memory once a day and in time your tears will subside and happy memories will make you smile. Hugs to you
Kimberly
***if i can only be with you in my dreams, i want to sleep forever***
Tay-Tay and Mama's boy I miss you-thanks for the butterflies

I didn't vacuum or clean for two weeks and I sobbed a lot too. Then I would go through frantic runs around the apartment looking for whiskers to keep - I put them all in a "memory box".

You know how I got through it? I kept lights on during the evening and I never went to bed early. I hugged my pillow and my spouse and my friends. I posted a memorial to my pets on a rainbow bridge site. I kept all of their bowls and collars and brushes and put them in the box.

Then....

I waited until the pain started to fade a little bit - where I wasn't crying EVERY single night.... and I adopted another little furry baby. That was 5 months later. Not a replacement, just so that the love that was in my heart could find another place to go. Another little one who needed a Mommy and a place to live.

I think we get used to having all of this "love" from our hearts go pouring out and bouncing back from our furbabies and when it suddenly stops it leaves a big void.

Thank you Kimberly and DJ. You both are such a big help. I'm on my fourth day, and I'm starting to "see the light". The hardest for me right now is being home. I keep expecting my little furry girl to jump up in my lap. Even though my spouse is here, the house feels so empty. You both are so very kind. It helps tremendouly to talk to someone who knows what I'm going through. My little Cici was nine years old. She was a little gray tabby with a bit of tan/peachy patches. It kinda looked like she had a little mishap with a bit of paint. And had great big golden eyes that at times appeared green. She's had a series of medical problems over the past couple of years and I would have done anything for her (and I did). But she recently developed fibrosarcomas that could not be treated. I miss her terribly. To me, she was the best, kindest, friendliest kitty in the world. And she WILL be forever in my heart and soul. Thanks again. Laurie

Hello Laurie
I'm so sorry about Cici, you’ve already found that it’s a little easier today than it was yesterday, it takes a long time, and we have to be patient with ourselves and let ALL the grief out.

Someone said to me that it takes at least one month for every year that we loved them, so I guess weve all got a long road ahead full of tears, smiles, and memories.

Love Sue

Thank you so much Sue. This support has helped me tremendously. The words are comforting and to know I'm not alone helps too. Thanks.

Janice, I just sent you an email. If you don't get it. Please feel free to email me. And, NO, you are definitely not alone.

Take care,
Laurie

Laurie and Janice,

Just cry. Sob. Scream. Be as sad as you need to be. For the first month after, I couldn't go in public bc I couldn't stop crying. Every morning when I'd wake up, I'd remember, and start to cry, and I'd cry al day until I fell asleep. I started to get worried about all that crying, afraid I might NEVER stop. But eventually, the tears slowed. I skipped an hour, then an afternoon, and eventually a whole day. Now, I only cry a few times a week, and its short lived when it happens...

Looking back, I think that first month was very healthy. I think I needed that time to grieve, to grieve 100%. I think if I had not done that, then I'd probably still be crying a lot more now...

Taking care of their remains helped a lot. Getting an urn and a headstone. Visiting Freyja's gravesite, and touching Saki's urn... I made a collage of photos of them in frames and doing that helped. Posting out here helped. Talking about it to people who understood helped. I donated some money to a veterinary school to get memorial bricks put up at the school. I made a memory box. Sometimes I still find things to put in it. It was hard to start cleaning.... It still is I guess. About three months after they died, I decided to wash the sofa cover. That was really painful bc it had so much of their furs on it.... I have this dry erase board that I've always made to do lists on, and when saki was sick, I had the board filled with "Hold saki" as my things to do... I just erased that this past week...

I am so sorry for your losses of Cici and Mittens. Know that they are loving you still as they romp and play at the Bridge where they have no pain, only joy. You will see them again when you get there.

Love,
Jennifer

Bless you Jennifer.